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Published: September 3rd 2011
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day 5 tues
In the morning Hayley was properly sick (not just hungover, which was my initial thought) and was in no state to do anything that day. However, she told me that it would be pointless for me to just stay at the hostel with her all day watching her sleep so she suggested i go out to see La Boca. I spoke to our two french friends Luke and Miriam because they had said they were going to go there too and agreed to join them.
However, unbeknownst to me Luke and Miriam were in the midst of a massive fallout with each other and Luke had decided he was going to shit her off and go his own way...starting with a flight to Los Angeles that evening! (i like his style). So, what ended up happening was that just me and Miriam went to La Boca together, leaving our respected travelling buddies at home.
La Boca was an area of the old town with small buildings that had been painted in bright colours and cobbled streets. La Boca itself was really nice but it was marred by the unhibited tourist tackiness. Everywhere there were shops selling
tourist tat and restaurants with Tango dancers outside to lure in tourists. There was even a very convincing Maradonna lookalike charging outrageous prices for a photo with him. We looked around La Boca for a couple of hours and then headed back to the hostel for some lunch. Hayley was still ill at this point and was not keen on going out for food so, low and behold, i found myself as the third wheel having dinner with the two feuding frenchies! Over dinner i don´t think i stopped talking in a desperate bid to avoid any uncomfortable silences. It worked! and the dinner was relatively painfree.
After dinner me and Hayley chilled out for a bit and then in the evening i was extended an invitation to a pool competition at a bar in San Telmo by Benji. How could i refuse! So (with her blessing) i reassured Hayley that i wouldn´t be too late getting back because it was just a few chilled drinks and i left her to sleep off her tummy bug as i made my way over to the bar. It was a little place with no sign outside, just two bright red doors
(which took me a while to find due to my colour blindness). It was owned by an american bloke called Lucas who had moved to Argentina 9 years ago. Lucas was also just about to open a kebab shop round the corner that would sell doner kebabs (something that they don´t have in South America). Me and Benji both lost our 1st games and were knocked out, but we spent the rest of the night chatting to the locals and playing an excessive number of England vs. Argentina pool games with two locals called Gonza and Sebastian!!
When i got home, i entered the dark dorm room and quietly climbed into bed to hear a quiet voice say..."You´re Late." I was...it was 7am...so much for a quiet one!
day 6 weds
The next day we both felt pretty fresh (suprisingly) and we made our way to Recoleta, a small part of the city where the famous cemetary is located. First, we walked to the massive steel ´flower´sculpture which opened and shut once a day to imitate a real flower. I thought it looked pretty cool, but as Hayley caught sight of it she exclaimed in a
familiar voice saturated with boredom "It´s a bit shit really isn´t it!"
We promptly moved on to see the art museum round the corner. Upon walking in we were greeted by a lovely lady who spoke in very fast spanish. I attempted to tell her politely that we didn´t speak Spanish ( "No Hablo Espanol") but i managed to get my tenses mixed up and actually said ("No Hables Espanol) which translated to "you don´t speak Spanish!". She just chuckled and waved over her mate who told us the entrance to the museum was to the left.
After the museum we headed over to the Cemetary, which was like a little miniature town with all the musoleums. It was kind of creepy because you could see all the coffins in each musoleum. Some of the musoleums were really extravagent, whilst some where in a dire state or repair. We visited Evita´s grave at the cemetary and then decided we had had enough of death and headed back to the hostel...with the aim of having a juicy steak, because even though meat is murder...it´s tasty tasty murder.
That evening we went to a steak house called La Brigade, which was banging!! Even the menu´s were made from cow hide with the fur still on!
day 7 thursday
The next day we headed to Palermo by bus. The buses only take coins but the problem is that there is a such a massive shortage of coins in Argentina that it is a real challenge to get enough change! Shops will actaully undercharge you so they don´t have to give you change!
Anyway, we got there in the end (after mussing our bus stop in Palermo) and we went to the Botanical Gardens, which were beautifully described in the guide book, but were in fact..."a bit shit really" as Hayley so adeptly put it.
We decided to indulge our childish side and went to the zoo instead. They actually had a great selection of animals; including a Polar bear (which was very sad), a white tiger, hippos, giraffes, elephants and a very angry monkey! After the zoo we went to the Evita museum, which showed videos of her various speeches and displayed items of her clothing etc (Hayley loved it).
That evening we went to a tango lesson which included a show and meal afterwards (with unlimited wine!). The tango show was great! and the teacher was really funny. He taught us 3 basic moves...1. the square, 2. the ócho´ and 3. the Tango Pose. Everybody´s tango poses were highly amusing! The tango show afterwards was very impressive! and was made even better by the copious amounts of wine.
After the Tango Benji came over to the hostel and we played some pool. And then at the last minute we made a smap decision to go to Club 69. What a club! It was jsut one main room with bars on either side and a stage up front. When we got there there was a breakdance crew dancing to electro music. After an hour or so a new act headed by an overweight transvestite took to the stage dessed in Indian sari´s. Then, for about 3 hours, the act didn´t bust a single dance move...instead they dry humped each other all over the stage. It was so surreal! At one point i looked around the dancefloor and not one single person was dancing, they were just standing gawping as 2 girls and 1 guy pretended to have a threesome. All in all, it was a wicked night and me Benji and Hayley got a cab home around 7am.
day 8 friday
The next morning we DID NOT feel great! In fact i don´t think i have ever felt so bad...and what´s worse was that i couldn´t just curl up in bed all day because we had to check out at 10am!! Needless to say we strung it out until 11.30am until we actually left the room but it was still waaaay too early!
We only had one thing to do that morning, and that was to send some of our clothes home because we had overpacked. Over the course of an hour we managed to find an empty corona box to put the clothes in, walk to the stationaers to get sellotape and then make the 20minute walk to the post office (all the while trying not to barf everywhere). When we got to the post office, and the conversation resembled something like this:
Ben: I want to send this to england.
Bitch: What is in the box?
Ben: Clothes
Bitch: Are they new clothes?
Ben: No
Bitch: Then you can´t send them!
Ben: What!?...they have to be new clothes! You can not be serious!
Bitch: Yes...NEXT PLEASE.
I could have broke down then and there...but i kept it together until we reached the hostel where i slept off my rage and watched a rubbish documentary about some shite musician called Daniel Johnston. At 7pm we threw our stuff and our bedragled bodies into a cab and got a bight bus to Mendoza (1st class again!).
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