Day 43

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I’ve only been exploring Wellington for one day, but I already love the vibe. It’s packed with quirky cafes and bars, and vintage shops and boutiques. I’ve been struck more than once by perfect presents for people back home (birthday presents) but I’m torn as to whether or not to get them at this point. I found some beautiful books, but they will be too heavy. I found a lovely lovely accessory that will suit a certain someone perfectly but it’s a little out of reach in terms of my budget. I’ll dwell on it, and possibly return tomorrow.

Going back in time a bit: I spent my last day in Taupo sleeping, eating, reading and… cleaning. I knew I needed a lot of sleep so I asked for a single room. They were all out, but offered me a double for the same price. They were short of cleaners that day so as a kind of afterthought the guy asked me if I wouldn’t mind helping them out for a few hours - in return my accommodation would be free. I cleaned for just over two hours and got a double bed for free. Best night’s sleep so far this holiday it was absolute luxury.

I joined a new bus with new people the following morning. Having said that, I did already know a few - for example Nayheli (that is OFFICIALLY how you spell her name) and Chris (an American with San Diego tattooed on his back in case he forgets where he’s from). We went to River Valley, which is where they filmed Rivendell in Lord of the Rings. We stopped off at two great waterfalls along the way. The first one was in the Tongariro National Park, which was where I did my long walk - and it was used in Lord of the Rings as Gollum’s pool. The other one served as “The Most Dangerous Thing You’ll Do in NZ”. Needless to say, every guy on the bus did it and every girl sat and watched (and ate their sandwiches). It was a 6m (or so) high waterfall, with a pool at the bottom so deep that no one had ever touched the bottom. The driver led the way, followed by the others. They jumped off one by one and everyone prayed that they would resurface (there were some pretty hairy moments where they were sucked back under again). There was one bloke in particular who managed to belly flop off the top of the waterfall.

River Valley was nice; a lodge embedded in the valley, next to the river (surprisingly). There was no signal on mobile phones and no internet, which was undeniably pleasant. We went for a swim in the freezing cold river (more jumping off various precipices and belly flopping) then had roast beef with all the trimmings for dinner - including Yorkshire pudding. It’s times like those that you really appreciate the fact that you’re in a group of predominantly British people. We spent the entire evening reminiscing about home and food that we miss. We’d all rather be out here though!!!

That night there were two sleeping options:
1. Sleep in one of a limited number of bunk beds (which I did).
2. Sleep in the crudely named “orgy pit”. There were four double beds laid side by side on two layers. The idea was that you just throw yourself on and keep yourself warm from the heat of other peoples’ bodies.
Most of the guys slept in the orgy pit - hoping for an “accidental” sleepy fondle of the nearest girl, no doubt. However, all the girls immediately opted for the bunk beds, so it turned into a girls room and a boys room.

We spent the evening (after the amazing meal) playing poker. I know the rules pretty well, but I’m not that good or experienced. There were three other girls playing at my table who had never played before. However, there was a Swedish guy (do you call them Swedes?) opposite me who claimed to have funded his travels through poker. He showed no mercy or chivalry, quickly making him the least popular person on the bus. However, karma came back around and bit him on his bum because he was beaten by an Irish guy (I tipped him off about the Swede’s playing antics, I feel responsible for his victory).

The next day, I went horse riding - not rafting as originally planned. I had a gorgeous horse called Rico (named after a rugby player - what else?) who, aside from bolting regularly, was perfectly behaved. There was another girl who had ridden before, but the other three were beginners (and within that three there was a Japanese girl who barely spoke English and just squeaked constantly because she was clearly scared of horses. How. Annoying.). It would have been nice to do more challenging things, but that’s life. The scenery was stunning and they seem to farm deer in NZ. I spoke to the girl in charge of the trek about how you can horse ride in NZ and you don’t need any qualifications or anything, and there is so much room (coupled with Kiwi Kindness) that it’s very easy to put your horse in anyone’s paddock. I would love to have a horse in NZ, I can’t think of any better place to go riding.

I went for a shower after riding, and it was rather painful because there was minimal privacy (if you craned your neck while in the shower cubicle, you could see everyone elses’ goolies). On top of that, the shower head was placed so low that I had to crouch under it for any water to hit me. The drive from River Valley to Wellington was about 4 and a half hours. I was trying to listen to an audiobook but the man’s voice was so soothing that I slept the whole way through. The driver (Rich) clearly got very bored while driving because he sporadically made announcements which were big fat lies. For example:
1. (while driving through a small village). OK guys, we’re here in Wellington now (everyone wakes up and starts looking around). To your left you can see the government buildings (actually a small house) and look, there’s the prime minister!!! Hi Ginny! Ginny?!?!? Ah well, she’s still upset about that night…
2. Do you see that tall grey concrete pin over there? (pointing at a water tower). This is right where the fault line is, and that pins the two tectonic plates together. Anytime the plates move, they just screw it in a few more metres.
3. (while driving into Wellington). Guys, don’t forget to go to the currency exchange before you take the ferry to Nelson. That one in particular charges 0% commission for Kiwi Experience passengers when you change your money into South Island Dollars.
4. (when we were originally heading to River Valley). So this bridge has a weight limit, I usually get people to get out when I drive over it. I’ve done it with 20 people in the bus before and we were fine. We’re running a bit late now… It’s not that far to fall anyway I think. (He drives to the middle of the bridge and stops…) Oh actually it is pretty deep, I reckon we would all die.

The Kiwi sense of humour is fantastic though, as I’m sure you can tell. A lot of it seems to be in aid of making British girls scream. When we were black water rafting, Aaron (one of the guides) stopped and screamed, then started rubbing his foot. All the girls immediately go “Oh no, are you ok?!?!?”. He said “Oh, it’s just those eels, they bite HARD”. Cue assorted girls screaming and writhing in their tubes. I’ve heard so many stories of other Kiwis doing the same thing. Like bungy jumping, they tell you to take your time and then when you get to the point of no return (i.e. when jumping off the ledge) they yell “NO!!! WAIT!!! STOP!!! OH MY GOD WE FORGOT TO…!” Or in the abseiling black water rafting thing that some people did, they would pretend people were 20m from the bottom, then drop them on their butts.

Last night I went out for some drinks with people from the bus. The nightlife in Wellington is apparently fantastic - I’m not so sure, but it was Tuesday night!! I ran into Michael and Andreas from skydiving (among many other things). I think I might be a bit in love with them both (in an entirely platonic way). They are just very, very nice people. I got pretty bored pretty fast though and had to deal with not waking up 9 other people in my room (epic fail) and getting into the top bunk (which is so high that I reckon I could strap a man on my back and skydive from it). I’ve moved into a bottom bunk now though, so that won’t happen again. Tomorrow is another day in Wellington - I’ll probably go back to the Te Papa museum. The day after that I travel across the Cook Strait and make the journey from North Island to South Island!!! Can’t wait!

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