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November 25th 2009
Published: November 25th 2009
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A Thoroughbred On SteroidsA Thoroughbred On SteroidsA Thoroughbred On Steroids

Feral Mike was offered the use of this bike for the Round Taupo Race. It's an oldie but a goodie, but with 14 gears and none of them very low he decided he was no match for the bike. He's no thoroughbred and nor is he on steroids.

Introduction by Lance Armstrong

Howdy y'all,
It gives me great pleasure to write this introduction to Feral's latest blog. You see, he and I go back aways. We've shared the excitement of the Tour de France for years - he sat on the couch watching me on tv and offering advice. Now he's doing some pedaling of his own, and taking part in some event called the Round Taupo Race this weekend. We've also both shared a passion in the past for Sheryl Crow. I got over her, but I think Feral still has a soft spot for her. Anyways, there's some common ground.

What is different about us is that Feral has always wanted to be a star - unlike me. That's why he's worked in television all those years - hoping someone some day would put him in front of the cameras and he would become a household name. Sadly, it hasn't happened. So now he's hoping he might become an internet star with this blog thing. I'm inclined to humour him, so I've sent off his web address to Sheryl and a few of the boys on the team. I'd like to suggest you do the same
Mountain Bikes with ExtrasMountain Bikes with ExtrasMountain Bikes with Extras

Here's a rear luggage rack. But what constitutes "extras" should be left deliberately vague so competitors, organisers and lawyers can argue until next year's event.
- drag out those contact lists and fire off the address to anyone you think might be interested. Here's the link:

Feral, all the best for Taupo. Remember, no drugs but shortcuts are good. By the way, did anyone ever tell you you look just like Mick Jagger - only younger and more handsome? I bet all the girls do, eh.
Have a nice day,

Round Taupo Race: A Late Category: By Feral Mike

With just a couple of days to the start of the big event, I'm having a crisis. I say the start of the event because I may not finish the same day. It may take me two days or even longer. But despite that, I have a plan to get onto the winner's podium.

Narrowing the Field to Get a Fighting Chance

I'm going to ask the organisers to introduce a new category. It's to be called:Mountain Bikes with Extras.
I won't insist that the organisers stipulate exactly what the extras are, but typical extras might be front and rear luggage racks and a heavy duty bipod stand. That should narrow down the number of entries in this new category and give
First to his Own Cut LunchFirst to his Own Cut LunchFirst to his Own Cut Lunch

The wine and glasses are missing, but here's a start for a picnic lunch half way round lake Taupo.
me a fighting chance.

Rules Vague On Purpose

I think the rules as to what constitutes extras should be left deliberately vague. That way there can be all sorts of arguments after the event - a bit like the America's Cup. Everyone can threaten to have each other disqualified and the lawyers will get plenty of work, and it will keep us all entertained until next year's event.

The Ultimate Extra

There is just one extra that I think should automatically guarantee a rider into this category. It's a handlebar bag containing a packed lunch, a bottle of wine, two glasses and a red and white check tablecloth. I think that would show a degree of flair that may be missing among the lycra crowd. I intend to carry this particular extra, and I'll probably stop and have lunch when I see a nice seat overlooking the lake at the halfway point - around 80k. And if someone cares to join me, I've got that spare glass. Even if I don't make a podium finish, this approach will guarantee that I'm first to my own cut lunch.

Hitching a Ride

I'm also going to ask the organisers if they are
Beast of Burden Gets MiffedBeast of Burden Gets MiffedBeast of Burden Gets Miffed

When the Beast heard he might be dropped from the race in favour of a Thoroughbred on Steroids, he threatened to break down once the NZ Tour resumes. He's calmed down, but is trying insist that whenever his named in mentioned in blogs it should be highlighted in capitals. Feral Mike is considering this demand.
going to have a "bus of shame" that scoops up the tail enders - a bit like the Auckland marathon. If they do, I'll probably catch it. After a couple of glasses of wine I'll be ready for a nap. I can do that on the bus, and then arrive at the finish fresh and relaxed and ready to party. And after all, it's really all about the party. Isn't it?

Stats at a Glance

Total Distance Travelled So far: 1708 kilometres
Maximum Speed: 60.6 kph on road into Taupo
Longest Daily Run: 123 kilometres


26th November 2009

I won't be there in person, but I'll be cheering you on all the way around, in spirit. It'll be me giving you that little push up that gnarly hill round the back of the lake, and I'll be the one shouting, You Can Do It, when you're ready to give up. Do it for the rest of us here at 3, still stuck inside on a beautiful day, wishing we were with you. GO MIKE!
26th November 2009

Thanks Chris
It's a bit daunting, but I've just been searching the Round Taupo website and their novices training schedule only gets to 120k. So clearly someone thinks that's enough to get round. It'll be fun. Thanks for all your support to date. Cheers, FM.
26th November 2009

Crazy much??
Dad your blogs are getting more loopy by the day, Im glad your in the civilised metropolis of Taupo with the non-crazy Ross (hmmm...) and Sarah for a while!
26th November 2009

Taupo Cycle
Good luck Mike - hope the Taupo trip treats you well - have a glass of red for me at the half way mark! Jen
3rd December 2009

Go Mike
What an amazing thing to do. Is there a book in this?...Take care

Tot: 2.084s; Tpl: 0.054s; cc: 12; qc: 48; dbt: 0.0271s; 1; m:saturn w:www (; sld: 1; ; mem: 1.3mb