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Published: November 27th 2005
The Look Of The Condemned Men
I think it was the glare, but we seem somewhat less than thrilled at this point.Warm Water, Large Sphere, Grassy Knoll ... Rock & Roll!
This is quite possibly the craziest thing I've ever done. And the most fun thing, too.
So you here's the deal: You drive out to this field. The first clue that something is amiss is when they hand you clothes other than your own to change into.
After you change and try to figure out what to do with your underwear, you drive to the top of a hill where a rather raffish figure, undoubtedly someone who couldn't get hired on at Sizzler, is squirting water into something that looks like a human-size hampster ball.
He puts a rubber mat into a hole in the ball that looks about the size of your left thigh, then tells you to stand over there, take a good run and dive head first into there. (Actually, with the accent it sounds like, "Stahnd ovah theyah, tekk a gud run ind dife hid fust intu theyah.")
You follow his directions, hoping to: (1) not miss the thigh-shaped hole, (2) make it all the way through the thigh-shaped hole on the first try, and (3) make it through the thigh-shaped hole
And They're Off!
At this point we may have still been standing. on the first try with your shorts still on, because you decided less was more when settling the underwear conundrum.
Luck smiles upon you, and you make it into the hampster ball with your entire body and your shorts. You land face first into the hampster ball, which is full of (thankfully) warm water. Your partner, in this case Rusty, follows suit while you look for a place to stay clear of his arrival.
The raffish local color pokes his head into the ball and asks, "You did sign the release form, right?" (aka ... "Ya did sahn t releyes fum, raht?") Seriously. And the person at the counter has already told you that you can't sue them.
All concerns over legal liability settled, you're then sealed in and told to walk forward in the water-filled hampster ball. Before you can think, "And then what happens?" ... you find out. The ball begins to careen down a hillside.
At this point, you last about two more steps before gravity takes its toll, and you are flung against: (1) your partner, (2) the roof of the ball, (3) the wet floor of the ball. This is where
Jill Came Tumbling After
Not so much standing anymore. things are no longer in control. The ball picks up speed. Balance is a luxury you no longer can afford. There are sheets of water (still thankfully warm) hitting your face so hard that you can't keep your eyes open. When you scream, however, you get a refreshing drink.
Eventually you collide hard enough with your partner that your bodies are fused together into one big, tumbling, wet mess. This is when you realize what the inside of a washing machine feels like and figure that the hill is only so long.
It turns out that the hill is indeed only so long. It also turns out that the only way out is the way you took in. The departure is eased because you are now sopping wet in someone else's clothes. It is also done sans humility in front of everyone who's waiting to go next. Sort of like exiting through the gift shop, only in soggy shorts. And rather than worrying about the lack of underwear, you're still happiest that the shorts are still on.
That, my friends, is Zorbing.
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Erica de Jesus
non-member comment
SO COOL!
Kenneth! I saw this on the amazing race and thought it was the most fun thing ever! So cool that you did it!