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Published: August 7th 2007
THE KIDS
Travelling with kids is ultimately one extraordinary pain in the butt. They expect to be fed, they expect to be sheltered and they expect to have the latest new release DVD rentals at their fingertips. Not only are they expensive, they are noisy, high maintenance creatures that want to sit in the car when it’s time to walk and they want to walk when its time to sit. That’s putting it mildly, not only do they want to walk when it’s time to sit in the car, they want to run, jump, pinch, pull, writhe and wrestle when its time to drive.
On the bright side it’s not always like that. Sometimes they sleep!
Often, well almost often, there is a harmony between Jordan and Quin that does surprise even us. Be it hours of cat’s cradle, singing nursery rhymes (true story!), playing clothes pin basketball because they were locked out of the house or just reading together. A bond has developed between the two that neither will admit and neither will forget.
The disharmony on the other hand, rarely surprises us. The one thing it does do, is drives us crazy. Drive is a key
word here since it is most often in the confines of the Previa when this conflict peaks. Usually it’s not malicious; really it’s related to them being just two teenaged kids who need to burn off some steam.
It was not long after a pattern of conflict escalation developed, that a strategy for combating conflict escalation was developed. The situation would usually begin with the back seat volume increasing to a certain level, followed by the tell-tale sign of impending conflict rearing its head (a debate surrounding the establishment of an imaginary line that divides the seat into two exactly equal halves), then we do one simple thing. Yes, once the first hint of “you’re on my side of the seat” surfaces we pull over to the side of the road, kick them out and tell them to go for a walk. We usually drive a few hundred metres, sometimes up to a kilometre, quite arbitrarily really. At the first reasonable opportunity, usually under the guise of a nice shade tree, we park and enjoy the peace while we wait for them to catch up. Ideally, if this intervention occurs early enough, what results can only be described as
a win-win situation. No buttons are pushed, no heated words are exchanged and no tempers are flared.
While on the road one needs to keep open to opportunities that present themselves out of the blue. Take for example the on the south island when the kids started grating on each others nerves. We followed the routine and booted them out of the van for a cool down stroll. As we searched for a peaceful location to wait for them we came across an historic landmark. It was a beautiful spring day; it was one of the oldest pubs in NZ and after all the kids were walking anyway; so we just stopped in for a wee pint while we wait for them to catch up. It all adds up to another one of those beautiful family moments, kids sitting on the bumper waiting for us in a dusty parking lot, Ange and I enjoying cool refreshing beverage inside. I’d like to see that technique written into a parenting book!
Ultimately Quin is the best traveller of us all. Quin has packing light dialled. At home, given the choice, he would wear the same clothes everyday. It only stands
to reason that he would have the same preference while we’re travelling. Two pairs of shorts, two t-shirts, four or five pairs of gotch, jandals (i), PJ’s, a towel, tooth brush and shampoo, MP-3 player; what else do you need? Soap, one might say, but Quin is quick to point out that the suds created from the shampoo are more than adequate for washing the face and body.
Quin also has no problem asking for and/or making the arrangements required for realizing his interests and desires. He approaches people easily and asks for directions, usually to the nearest go-carting attraction. He actively searches out info center staff, hostel managers, tour operators, garbage men; anyone he suspects might be in the know.
Quin is reasonably handy in the kitchen and prefers to cook breakfast or to bake treats that he can share with other hostel guests. He loves the reaction and gracious thanks that he gets when dolling out fresh warm muffins. Ange and I recognize most of the more appreciative recipients are the same 18-21 year old males who hover around the “free food” shelf at check-out time and eat pasta or white rice with margarine for breakfast lunch
and dinner. That being said he is truly generous and we are proud to see him sharing the fruits of his labours.
Quin is a capable albeit reluctant dish washer who has a real knack for disappearing when the work starts. A quick search will always find the missing boy in the TV room. But he is not a passive viewer. He likes to put up posters and let everyone in the hostels know what movie will playing and when. He has had some very impressive, “floor seating only” turnouts for his showings. Gold Member and Soul Purpose, his favourite ski movie, stand out as two particularly well-attended matinees.
One of our nicknames for Quin is The Chaperone. On arrival at a new domicile Quin is quick to announce that he has dibs on the queen size bed, perhaps with an inquiry regarding who will be joining him. He gets shut down every time. It is not remotely the case that he wants to sleep with someone else in the queen bed, he just wants to ensure that Ange and I are not expecting to be in there together. This of course is because, there will be, in
no uncertain terms, NO; I repeat NO, hanky panky going on. Eyes like a hawk and ears as sensitive as those of a frightened fawn, he may tolerate and authorize a smooch but never a kiss and he demands full length PJ’s be worn by all parties at all times.
Quin is usually at his best when he connects with a peer of his age and interests. Picture Quin shining a one million candle-power spot light into the forest canopy while his best friend-du-jour Archie takes pot shots at possums with a pellet gun; or the two of them spear fishing at night wearing nothing but gum boots and boxers.
If left to his own devices Quin’s travel budget would be on par with George W’s military spending. There are precious few activities and tours that he wouldn’t do and naturally he would buy every “cool car” we come across which seems to be at every turn. One thing that’s for sure it would be fun!
Quin’s notable quotes:
“If we ever go on another round the world tour….. count me out.”
“I’m not saying that I do, but I was just wondering, have any of
you guys ever peed while having a shower? You have? Oh, in that case I just did and I do it every single time!”
“I want to go to school.”
“Deve (ii)……… no offence, but I’m a way better surfer than you are.”
“Nursery Rhymes are cool.”
Ultimately Jordan is the best traveller of us all. She always has the map in hand, knows where we are and where we’re going (thank heaven’s someone does!). Her pack will always produce the string, duct tape, hand sanitizer, sunscreen, insect repellent, rain coat, hat, snack food, towel, safety pins, absorbent pads for bleeding control, you name it, when most needed. She is after all an experienced Girl Guide and world traveller; the only one in the family that actually had a passport prior to this trip!
She’s increasing more confident in approaching strangers and asking for information. She carefully selects her activities and weighs the interests of everyone else when voicing her opinion on what she’d like to do. Sometimes to a fault Jordan would often miss a desirable stop as opposed to speak out and get her opinion heard.
Jordan’s culinary interests are more apt to be
the preparation dinners and particularly lunches. While travelling, peanut butter and jam with a smattering of Marmite (iii) became a common staple. Now at our bach her forte is fancy grilled sandwiches on the sandwich press loaded with fresh veggies, humus and cheese.
If she goes missing she is more likely to be found in a common area with a book that she’s found. A fastidious record keeper, she maintains a list of the books she’s half read as a reference so she can search for them in subsequent libraries and pick up where she’s left off. She also homes in on whatever crafts, yoga, or cards games that are going on.
Jordan is at her best when we are on the move and she can get involved in the daily workload with out being told what needs to be done. She understands the program and is tuned into what is going on around her so she is effectively able to slot herself into a job without being asked. Laundry, dishes, housework, lawn mowing, she does it all. Ironically we find ourselves thanking her for her hard work on one hand but on the other telling her not
to take on so much responsibility. It is not a typical teenage scolding when the parents are telling the daughter to spend more time socializing with friends and not to worry so much about getting into a little trouble from time to time!
One of her favourite games is the IPod Top 25 countdown. She updates the computer with our two IPods and goes through the most frequent songs as if it were a weekly radio show. Normally the songs that exist on both our IPods score the highest; along with those which I am trying to learn how to play. These I listen to over and over and over and over again thus artificially inflating their popularity.
In the water Jordan is quite at home and she easily spends hours at the beach in and out of the water. Her surfing has come along way, she body boards and likes to snorkel in the waves as well. She has been most at ease in a kayak, where she has a strong yet relaxed paddling style. She really shines kayak surfing and frequently has the last laugh when she’s the only one to make the beach without a
spill.
If left to her own devices Jordan’s travels would be varied and interesting. Nature walks and any wildlife viewing opportunities would be high on her list along with a healthy dose of hikes, beach trips, museums, aquariums and other attractions. Jordan is adventurous but not too adventurous. For example she liked Zorbing(iv) and jet boating but would not even consider bungee jumping but who other than Quin, could blame her for that.
Jordan’s Quotables (v)
“I want to go to school so I don’t have to hang out with my annoying little brother 24/7.”
“Papa, wrong side of the road! Wrong side of the road! You’re driving on the wrong side of the road!”
Travelling with kids is ultimately the greatest thing you can do. There is no better experience than being out on the open sea surrounded by your family, bobbing around in a huge Raglan swell after battling out the raging shore break, hooting and hollering as each waits to select their next ride back to the beach. This trip so far, has had a multitude of magic life moments. From snorkelling a coral reef in Fiji’s azure waters or kayaking at
sunset on the North Island’s East Cape; banding together on a rescue or simply playing a board game, riding a Ferris wheel on a Nelson New Year’s eve, finishing a hike or having all four of us crammed into one hostel bed on a cool, rainy Christmas night watching a movie on the laptop. BIG and small, these experiences have been gems and will create memories that will last our life times!
i) Translation: Jandal, kiwi for flip-flop. Interesting note; kiwi’s claim that the flip-flop or more authentically jandals are a New Zealand invention.
ii) Deve is how Quin pronounced “Steve” one day when he was clenching a pen between his teeth. Being quite amused with himself over this and being the sassy little rat that he is, he thought that he would adopt this as one of his dear father’s nicknames.
iii) Translation: Marmite, the Kiwi version of and dare I say a far superior incarnation of Vegemite.
iv) Zorb: a double walled sphere about 2 meters in diameter. Zorbing is the processes of climbing inside a Zorb then rolling down a grassy hill inside the giant ball partially filled with warm soapy water
v) Jordan’s wry and dry sense of humour doesn’t quite lend itself to the quotables as does Quin’s. She is much more subtle but funny never the less!
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Christine
non-member comment
Listen to Jordan, never bungee jump!!!!