Melbourne

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The last of our Greyhound journeys saw Myself and Dan bound for Melbourne aboard the worst bus we'd been on and at 12 hours, one of the longest journeys. Because of a bad night's sleep the previous day, I had severe neckache, which meant I didn't have much sleep on the journey. OUr decisioin to bypass Canberra proved to be a wise choice as we drove through the centre of the ghost town. I thought that as it is the Capital, it was worth at least one night there, but after having been advised against it I'm glad we didn't bother.

Arriving in Melbourne at 8am having had no sleep, the first priority was to find a bed. A minute after getting our bags on our backs, we were confronted by an Irish lad with a dog who asked us if we needed a place to stay, and so we headed for the All Nations hostel, which at $18, we couldn't go wrong. All the staff there were really helpful, and it was just around the corner from the neighbours tour office. We told the Irish dude that we had tickets to the Ansac day Aussie rules game between Essendon and Collingwood we had bought a couple of weeks ago, and he wanted to buy them off us as it was a big game and was sold out. We said no.

I caught a few hours kip on the most uncomfortable bed I've ever slept on ($18 a night though remember) and we caught some much and busted it about the city on the free tram. We had a walk around the Treasuary Gardens, where the Aussies have ressurected Captain James Cook's Parent's house, which was shipped over in Barrels and Crates from England. It is apparently the oldest building in Australia. We then headed back to the hostel where we got sorted for the neigbours night, which claimed to be the 'best night you'll have in Australia', I wasn't so sure.

After a short tram ride that we couldn't work out how to pay for, we arrived at the Elephant and Wheelbarrow where we queued up with the other 300 neighbours fans to get in. I could hardly contain my excitement. We were seated with a table of 4 other English people (although everyone there was English, or Bristish) and waited for the stars to come out. We were treated to Michelle Scully, Conner, Janelle Timmins, and Karl Kennedy. The night started at 6:30pm and there was a couple of hours of suspense (and beer drinking) before they were all introduced. The quiz then started, and the cast made their way round the tables for photos and brief chats. All the cast were really down to earth, especially Karl Kennedy, or Alan Fletcher (Fletch) who is a legend, and I don't even watch neighbours!

We heard our team name read out and thought that we had won, but we'd only managed 5th, which was a bit embarrassing given our premature celebrations.

After the quiz, there were some games played on stage, and some trips given away, and then Dr K and his band, called 'the Waiting Room' came out and played some classics including 'Living on a Prayer' and 'Chelsea Dagger' by the Fratellis (Legend). Everyone was on the dancefloor having a whale of a time and loving the band. The DJ came on after the band and the night began to end at about 3am. I decided to continue the night with a few others we'd met during the night and headed to a place called 'Traffic'. I thought that there was some show on when I got in the club as there were men dressed in drag on the stage. It wasn't until I got my arse pinched by a dude that I realised I'd just paid to get into a gay bar (I had had a lot to drink) and I finished my beer and made my way home. It's not that I'm particulary homophobic, but I find a man dressed up as a woman winking at me and licking his lips across the bar slightly unnerving.

Back at the hostel I met up with Dan who had also just got back, and with less than 2 hours kip, we were booked in for a tour to the Great Ocean Road the next morning. And for the first time in 2 months, we overslept. I put this down to not having Will with us, who normally does all the worrying and planning for us. I think Dan and I had got too used to this and couldn't cope on our own.

The really annoying thing was that it was Tuesday, we were going to a massive Aussie Rules game on Wednesday, and flying back to Sydney on Thursday, so unless we did it today, we were going to miss the Great Ocean Road, the Twelve Apostles, and more importantly, the lighthouse from 'Round the Twist'! The plan we formulated was to get up and out, hire a car, and drive it ourselves, afterall, it was only a couple of hours away, wasn't it?

We left Melbourne at about 2pm, and by 5pm, with the Twelve Apostles nowhere to be seen, we started to worry. It wasn't until after 7pm that we eventually pulled up at the Twelve Apostles information centre, which was of course deserted. We were, however, determined to catch a glimpse of these rocks and so headed down the boardwalk to the sea. Surprisingly, we could actually make out the Apostles, but there was no chance we'd be able to take a photo without a floodlight. Yes, it was demoralising when we saw the sun disappear half way along the Great Ocean Road, but I like to think that Dan and I have done something that not many others would be brave enough to try. A 10 hour round trip to catch a peek of these beautiful rocks in the darkness, just to avoid letting ourselves down, and to be able to say " Twelve Apostles? Been there, done that, bought the tshirt!". And we saved ourselves a few dollars by doing it on our own!

The drive back was just as interesting. We decided to use a photo taken at the information centre as a map and take the inland road to Geelong to shave a a bit of time off of our trip. After passing a sign to Geelong, Dan informed me that "there'll be another turning in a bit". There wasn't

After over half an hour driving down a logging track with sheer drops down to the forest floor on each side, we decided to turn around and take that signpost. The car arrived back in St Kilda at about 12:30am, we locked the keys in the boot outside and headed to bed. We drove the timewise equivalent of London to Edinburgh and back in a day to look at a set of rocks in the dark. Now if that's not hardcore, I don't know what is!

The next day the Force caught up with us and we all checked in to the Greenhouse, which is a much nicer, cleaner hostel, similar to Footprints in Sydney. That afternoon we headed down to the Melbourne Cricket Ground (MCG) to watch Essendon play Collingwood in an Aussie Rules Football game. Whilst the atmosphere wasn't the same as an English sports ground atmosphere, the 90,000 people and the closeness of the game, plus a few beers, made the day a really worthwhile experience. We only had standing tickets right at the back, but half way through the 2nd half we where able to blag a spare seat. The game itself is similar to Rugby but you have to get the ball through posts at either end to score, and can throw and kick the ball in any direction. There are also rules about tackling, which I think make it a bit lamer than Rugby, and you notice that all the players are a lot smaller than rugby players. Whether this is because all the decent sportsmen go and play rugby, or that speed and agility is more key in Aussie rules, I don't know.

That night we met up with some friends we had met further up the east coast, at a bar called bimbos, which had really strange baby dolls dotted around the bar. We then headed to St. Kilda which, as it was a Wednesday night, wasn't very busy, but has some funky little bars.

Thusrday morning was the neighbours tour, where we all got on a bus with a big "Neighbours" sign on the side (very embarrassing) and headed to Erisburough, where we saw the school, the studios, and of course, Ramay Street. Ramsay Street is a lot smaller that you'd imagine, only having about 6 houses on it. Whilst the tour was good, and you get to meet another star, which in our case was Dr. K. again, if you have your own transport and are on a tight budget, I'd recommend just getting to Ramsay Street yourself.

Thursday night we all flew back to Sydney, for part deux of the adventure.

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