Who moved Australia?

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My first log!
Monday 5th July and there are 34 days to go before we (my partner and I and our two children) embark on this journey to the other side of this small planet. It used to be a much bigger planet by the way when I was a child. Australia was so far away then that you actually had to book a telephone call with those people who owned the telephone system. I suppose someone had to pay for the long winding cable which stretched from these shores all the way around the globe.
Nowadays, the other side of the globe is 'just over there', its seconds away, the time it takes a web cam to re-scan and transmit. Who moved Australia? Thats what I want to know. Someone did.
Once, Earth was so huge it took several weeks and sometimes months to travel to Australia. In the blink of an eye ( my eye probably) someone or somebody shrank the planet. So much so that it now only takes about 24 hours ( a single day) to get there. One day, these same people, technologists I think they are called, will steal some more Planet Earth, and you will literally be able to step through a portal and pop out at the Sydney Opera House, watch a Diva or two, drink a 'tinny' and be home for Emmerdale before its even been made.
I wonder where all the soil and rock and sea went when they made the earth smaller. Perhaps John Prescott flogged it off to a band of wandering aliens and they are now making a mint out of conning stupid Martians that there is life on Earth after all - except in the case of Prescott aka Jabber the Hut that is. Prescott does not count, Prescott is just a slobbering curry eating jelly of an ex seaman's scivvy. He's good at selling land though...and throwing the odd jab at heroic egg throwing members of the public. Perhaps thats why he's called JABBER the hut, I don't know.
Anyway...Oz beckons, and as a firm believer that travel is part of the journey and not just the destination, I am at once pleased that we shall be able to enjoy a longer period in this faraway land, by getting there in just under 24 hours, and part of me weeps that I have been deprived by technology (and cost) of actually languishing around the deck of a ship for three weeks pretending to be Captain Cook.
Sarah, bless her, has planned, organized, itinerized, ordered, counter ordered and timetabled every single aspect of our pending mammoth journey to Oz. I even know what colour underpants I shall be wearing at precisely 00.14 over Singapore on the bloody way back! On the other hand, I could not even have attempted this unenviable task of gigantic logistical proportions. I can get us to heathrow but that's about it.
I have asked Sarah for "Time Out" moments during our visit down under. I need bad hair days, I need to go where the wind blows and under a fair sky and a lookout for spontaneous outbursts of just pure adventure, I should be able to placate my need for disorder and the unknown. Sarah has agreed. She has told me when these moments will be available. I just sigh and carry on loving hating her.  More later....

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Photos

Me aged six
When I was six years old the World was bigger than heaven.