Coming Home. Lessons Learned.

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Part 23 May 20
Verona, Wisconsin

I had thought I'd end this blog when we left for the US, but it seems a small bit on our return is in order. For the most part, there wasn't much of a culture shock as Australia and New Zealand are a pretty good transition to developed western living. Coming straight back the US from Asia would surely be more abrupt.
Leaving Australia was sad for me much more than anyone else. In many ways there was emotion about accomplishing something overall in our travels and great pride in the kids and Elaine, but mostly it was a feeling of having to end what has been a wonderful adventure and a lifestyle that is not all that hard for me to enjoy.
And our last couple days in Oz were exceptionally special, with Saturday spent with our friends from India who now live in Melbourne (eating gobs of home cooked Indian food) and Sunday featuring an Australian Rules Football game at the hallowed Melbourne Cricket Grounds and dinner at what is reportedly Melbourne's best restaurant, Taxi. Then it was on to the plane for the long flight (14 hours) that arrived in LA before it left Melbourne.
The first impressions off the plane are less than heart warming--looming pictures of Bush and a smirking Dick Cheney, officious security guards, long lines at customs, bureaucratic passport checkers (not even a polite "welcome home"), and inexplicably lax (read non existent) customs inspections. LA is LA--loads of nice cars, super sized freeways with loads of these nice cars plying the pavement, and astronomically priced homes serviced continually by a countless array of immigrant landscapers, roofers, painters, car detailers, nannies, carpenters, and other house up keepers (particularly interesting in light of the recent anti immigrant hullabaloo).
Flying out of LAX with American Airlines proved a model of inefficiency, with a series of awkward procedures to get our luggage checked in before we joined a 1/4 mile long line snaking outside and to the Delta terminal before returning inside to wait to go through security. We have been through a few airports on this trip and this was by far the most absurd (so much for American ingenuity and efficiency). I will not waste anyone else's time explicating the gory details of this "system"--let it rest at the observation that it could be made a bit more efficient.
In Madison, as always, I am struck by the vibrancy of the economy here. New housing, huge stores, countless shops, restaurants, banks, new libraries and schools and sports fields, people driving everywhere, money just flowing and flowing. While there is a small sense of consumer madness here, there is more a sense of quality of life, with people seeming to have good jobs and nice homes and good schools all reaping the fruits of a strong economy. Nowhere else in our travels did we see such a booming economy (except maybe London or some coastal areas of Spain), but it is hard for me to have any immediate insight into what this means.

May 27, 2006
Saxtons River, Vermont

It feels like we were barely gone for a week now that we are home. Vermont is a good place to come home to and still full of much beauty. I was touched by the welcome of the Compass students, who were not nearly as welcoming of me always when I was school director. It was also nice to realize just how nice a group of people there are working at Compass and how nice they are just to hang out with. So it has been nice to reconnect with folk, the house and gardens are in thankfully good shape, and not much else seems all that different from when we left.
The one major change, not so surprisingly, is feeling we don’t need all the stuff we have. I don’t think we actually have so much by US standards, but after living with a couple shirts and pants all year, it seems like having hordes of T shirts and all these choices of shorts and pants and all just isn’t necessary. And all this other stuff that clutters up the house seems better just left up in the attic instead of adding clutter into our lives.
It is easy to fall back into the same lifestyle here as when we left, which is largely good. We have a good life up here and there is much that is wonderful about how we spend our time and energy. But there are also lessons from our trip we hope we can retain, at least in some small ways—and that, I think, is not so easy to do. Maybe we will have to start planning the next big trip to rekindle this spirit?

Lessons

So as we return home, it seems time to reflect on what we take way from this beyond many fond memories, a pile of souvenirs, and a heap of digital pictures. The kids have grown in so many ways, are much more aware of the world around them, and have shown amazing adaptability. As a family, we have had quality time in spades, and still seem to all get along pretty well and have countless shared experiences we will cherish. For me, there are many lessons as follows:
1. I can't leave behind my personal challenges no matter how far from home I am. Things I struggle with at home, I pretty much struggle with on the road. But, with enough effort and repeated chances to improve, I also improve at some things--at least a tad bit.
2. Like, for example, accepting there are some things I can't control, that sometimes I just have to believe some things happen for a reason, and even if not, sometimes good enough is really good enough. I can still get plenty put off when even little things go "wrong," but at least sometimes I almost take this in stride.
3. An admonition by an aborigine musician helped me be more accepting, when he advised, in a fashion that is both aborigine and at least partly just Australian, "Don't think too much." I haven't exactly tamed my churning mind, but sometimes I remind myself to try to just live in the moment and more in my heart than in my head.
4. The world goes on without us--not being fully informed about every news item neither prevented them from occurring or changed their outcome. For the most part, it was a relief not to keep on top of the daily scorekeeping, reviewing, or prognosticating of the news. But when things were more personal, such as the untimely death of a dear friend, it is awful to be so far removed.
5. My nature is to be busy. Even with months without real work or responsibilities or time schedules, we managed to rarely slow down and still felt there was more we wanted to do than we had time for. I did manage to accept not exercising every day, and read a lot more than at home, but once the kids were ready, we were usually out and about and could find plenty to keep us busy.
6. Kids can be great travelers: Maybe all kids are adaptable and flexible by nature (maybe not). I was continually impressed by our kids, who took just about everything in stride for nine months. I don't know if they had the qualities that made them such good travelers or they learned them in transit. Either way, they showed a remarkable ability to be open to new experiences, sleep anywhere, be organized and responsible for their things, not complain even if they were picky about food, walk, cycle, hike or bounce on roads for long distances, and be comfortable anywhere (almost).
7. A family of 4 can live in close proximity for a long time. I don't think we have slept more than 5 feet away from each other since leaving Vermont, and most of the days we spent all in the same place. Sure sometimes we got on each other's nerves, but more typically, we enjoyed shared experiences, tried and trued jokes (many to do with bodily functions), and worked pretty effectively. I'm not so sure our kids would be so willing to be so close if they were teenagers.
8. One bit of travel advice, in addition to not putting it off: Circling back to places is really rewarding and advisable: Several times we were in a city for a couple days and then returned back to the same city again later (Bangkok, Luang Prabang, Asilah, Melbourne). It was great to return to someplace familiar (our kids loved feeling like they knew a place already), to know our way around, and to be able to revisit favorite spots like restaurants or stores as if we were at home.
9. Finally, it is rewarding to write for an audience. It has been gratifying to hear from folks who have kept track of our trip through this blog. I was especially pleased to learn a class of 6th graders in Texas has followed the trip as part of their Global Studies course. I hope in some small way this has helped others learn a little about the wonders of the world that we are so fortunate to have experienced first hand.

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Photos

The End of the Road
The last morning with our campervan home, and our good friends from India at their home in Melbourne

Melbourne Nights
The last night at Melbourne, after a fine dinner by the river

Family Photo
Out on the trail