Lovely Luau

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Today we decided to have another lazy day, which of course was nothing to do with the beers we'd had last night.....

No, we'd booked to go to Paradise Cove for a Luau and show, and as the hotel pick up was 1530, we decided to stay local and hang around the pool. As we'd not managed to visit the Polynesian Cultural centre on the North Shore, we really wanted to go to a Luau whilst we were in Hawaii, and we'd read and heard that this one was a good one, so we booked it for this evening. It was also a nice chance for us to get our glad rags on and get dolled up, (Daryl even wore trousers instead of shorts!) seeing as we'd mainly just been cutting about in casuals etc all holiday. I wore my new summer dress that Daryl had bought me for my birthday, and even blow dried my hair and put some make up on-such was the occasion! I'd bought some flower hair bobbles to get right in with the theme (and later learned I was wearing it on the correct side) and we boarded the bus for Paradise Cove.

Our guide for the night was 'Cousin Mo' who had the job of reminding us fellow cousins what instructions we had to follow, what bus we needed to get on (bus 4 by the way- he did this a million times) and basically get everyone in the mood for the evening. We couldn't decide if he was amusing or just a little bit annoying like a Hawaiian version of a butlins redcoat on a caffeine overdose. It would have been a bit more preferable to hear a little bit more about the place and the history rather than getting us to participate in group hand gestures to indicate was bus we were on (bus 4) and what queue to get in (bus 4 queue) and what table to sit at (bus 4 table) and what bus to come back to (did I tell you we were on bus 4?!) even Daryl had knocked off to him by this point, and we both laughed imagining what his even less tolerant brother, Gareth's face would be like if he was on Cousin Mo's bus. I could visualise him now saying 'FAIL' and for me this was the most entertaining part of our journey to paradise cove (See Gatch, you have the ability to make us laugh from the other side of the world!)

When we finally arrived (the Journey to paradise with Cousin Mo seemed never ending) I'm glad to say the place made up for our bus 4 chat. It was on the East of the Island of Oahu, just past Pearl Harbour, and again, gorgeous landscape and beaches, a really beautiful setting for a cultural evening.

We had a Mai Tai and our photos taken with the hula girls, where we decided to keep our sunglasses on as anyone who knows us will know that in the majority of photos, at least one of us has our eyes closed. It also gave Daryl a chance to debut his new sunglasses he'd treated himself to that day, and covertly check out the girls coconut bras from beneath his new polarised lenses, while I would be seemingly blissfully unaware. I bet all the men in the queue wished they had Daryls sunglasses at this point!

Moving on, we were each given a lei to wear, which I was such a geek about and very excited to wear to get into the spirit of our evening-let's face it, when you think Hawaii, you think the garland of flowers around the neck, it's the done thing. Daryl even managed to wear it for a whole 20 minutes (mainly at my insistence) before saying it was too hot around his neck and giving it to me. (I think the real reason is because it was pink, and no self respecting, rugby loving, hairy Welsh soldier wants to get caught up in wearing pink flowers around his neck-I was lucky he obliged for so long just so I could get some photos)



We got talking to an Australian girl called Rebecca who was on our table, and as she was by herself, asked her if she wanted to have a look around with us. The place had a village setting with lots of different things going on, so our first stop was to the tattoo place, where the men mainly had a Polynesian design and the girls, something a bit more girly. I opted to have a butterfly on my arm, as it reminded me of our little Isabelle at home, Rebecca had a flower, and as Daryl has a permanent Maori tattoo on his arm, didn't really need to have a pastel one drawn on. Next we went down to the beach to have a go on an outrigger boat, whereby Daryl sat out and had Rebecca and I paddling him around the bay, (I'm sure it was because he thinks I need the phys more than him.)



We had a go at some strange rock and stick throwing game and Rebecca and I tried our hand at spear throwing (Fatima Whitbread-not a patch on us) and we were given a shell lei after each activity which Daryl decided was less girly than pink flowers and happy to wear this instead.

We watched coconut husking and a tree climbing, whereby when the man reached the top, showered us with flowers which we retrieved to wear behind an ear Hawaiian stylee. Apparently left ear means you're taken, right ear means your single, and both ears is in need of an upgrade!

On the beach we watched the Tahitian dancers (Daryls sunglasses still firmly in place) and a fishing demo of how they used to cast the nets and draw in the fish ready for the Luau. Cousin Mo had roped a few men in on our bus (bus 4) to take part in this, which I felt was a little unfair as the men got Tahitian dancers shaking their hips (who were stunning) and us girls got the pressed American tourists wearing grass skirts over their beer bellies drawing in a fishing net.....

Our final show before tea was at the amphitheatre, where we watched our food being removed from the earth oven and the hula dancers as the sun set. It was cheesy and touristy but really good fun and entertaining.



We didn't have to wait too long to be called up for food, which was a good buffet selection of pork fish and chicken, rice pasta and salad, for afters I got a bit of coconut cake and Daryl had chocolate cake and a mini cookie. We made our way back to our seats for my favourite part of the evening-eating! (And also to watch the show.) we had some more Polynesian dancing, the New Zealand Haka, but by the time Samoa were due on for their Island piece, it seemed the UK had gate crashed the party and steadily the rain started to fall on their parade. The girl did a great job of smiling all the way through her dance, whilst the audience and fellow cousins paid little attention, and instead were flapping around like fish trying to get their free pack a macs over their heads whilst wolfing down food at the same time.



Daryl managed to grab an extra pac a mac to make a little tent over our heads (and more importantly food) but then the lightning started, the fish was practically swimming off the plates, Daryls dessert cookie had turned to mush, our drink involuntarily became a lager top (with rain water) my hair was stuck to my head-wilted flower behind my ear and makeup ran down my face, new dress sodden and soaked stuck to my legs, and thus the announcement was made, the show must (not) go on, and the rest of the evening therefore cancelled. Cousin Mo appeared back on the scene urging us to run for our lives to get back on the bus (bus 4). As disappointing as it was, we really couldn't help but laugh our heads off, it was such a shame, but the weather can't be helped, and we'd had a great time until now at least, and thankfully had managed to eat something which unfortunately couldn't be said for everyone at the Luau.



Back on bus 4 (2 hours earlier than planned) we awaited the arrival of the rest of our 'cousins' but not before a photo opportunity of us in our pac a macs underneath the Paradise Cove sign. We couldn't look at our coconut bra photo from earlier as it was too wet to display them so had to leave a forwarding address (apologies in advance Claire Cox for when you send on my mail) After all Cousin Mo and his broken record chat about Bus 4, some people actually managed to get on the wrong one, but eventually we were off back to Waikiki again, a little more damp than when we'd arrived.

Cousin Mo seemed to think he had to make up for our evenings lost entertainment, and proceeded to sing to us all the way back, starting with Happy Birthday (for the obvious reasons) Marvin Gayes 'Let's get it on' for the honeymoon cousins, and Adele's 'someone like you' for the single cousins on bus 4. By the time YMCA came on, my internal laugh had returned and soon became external, thinking of Gareth and just wishing he was with us simply so I could see his face, complete with eyes rolling, mouthing 'FAIL' under his breath! I wasn't sure if it was tears of laughter or rain from my hair, but it cheered up the situation. Hats off to Cousin Mo tho, as anyone who can get a whole bus (minus Daryl and I who had taken solace in our Kindle instead-thanks again for that Mum!) to do a seated Cha Cha Slide and Gangnam Style dance whilst piss wet through deserves a little recognition.

Back in Waikiki, and on dry land, we got off bus 4 a stop early, swapped email addresses with cousin Rebecca, promising to email her our washed out photos, and decided to have a wander around the street market and a few drinks in the bar before heading off to bed. If nothing the evening had been entertaining in a way we weren't expecting. With the rain akin to the earlier hangover situation, nobody likes the rain, but rain in Honolulu, makes a pleasant change from rain in the Rhondda Valleys, and it appears the Polynesians have as many 'cousins' as the Welsh as well......

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