Don't Dream It's Over

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I sit sipping my 3rd coffee of the day, tired from a day of employment which is to pay the bills and to fund the next travel adventure. I am back in the real world, my social life a spark of what it was only weeks ago. Now I drink much less and find myself consistently being more responsible. I do have two years of moments, still frames in my mind that remind of all that has been experienced and accomplished. I also have a feeling that reminds me of the last 2 years. I have been humbled and amazed by what we call life and this shadows me throughout my moments of the day. I both feel and see things differently.

Handshakes, hugs, kisses, smiles, laughs, smells, flavours, sounds, landscapes, emotions, friendships, lusts, music, contemplation, moments of amazement and moments of thought. Flashbacks happen with something as simple as the smell of roasted chestnuts and I'm in Chinatown in Kuala Lumpur, the sight of a scooter and I'm in Saigon, the sound of playing children and it's Cambodia, a surfboard sighting and I'm in Australia. The sound of a song can relocate me to a place that's not so far away when I close my eyes. Pet Sounds album by the Beach Boys and I'm on a hike in New Zealand, The Ramones and it's Cambodian landscapes, U2 and it's everything Brisbane, Chris Isaak evokes images of an empty Western Australian road, Iggy Pop takes me to the trams of Melbourne, plus every song on the playlists at Pepe's, the Down Under Bar plus the live shows of Lloyd Spiegel, The Bad Penguins (playing Katie Morgan's favourite number 4) and Tommy McNulty. Music triggers detailed memories, whether its a day looking out a window with the head phones on, or a song that kept appearing in different places.

What can I say? Months of travel without a solid plan, a much needed time out from my life. Two years ago I left home half a man, deflated from a couple unhappy and trying years of life. I was private, reserved and inward looking with a lack of trust in people after a two year stint of employment at a maximum security prison. I read travel blogs, enjoying the words, stories and pictures of other peoples adventures. These blogs helped me through my days prior to travel. I enjoyed these stories and decided I wanted to share my adventures of the road. The uncomfortable and unknown world of sharing myself I entered. My first words I uncomfortably typed from the comfortable location of my old apartment in Dublin. I figured it might take awhile to get used to this sharing thing I signed myself up for. My blogs did improve (but slowly) as the trip progressed as I developed and became more comfortable at seeing, experiencing and sharing. I began this trip at a directionless point in my life. I didn't know what I should be doing or where I should be at this stage in my life, so a travel adventure seemed the best and most exciting option I could think of. I boarded my first plane of this trip uncontent with myself and uncomfortable inside my skin. I was a shadow of a man, half a man. Two years later I returned twice the man I was on departure day, making me just a man at present day, a man comfortable in his own skin with a new view of myself and the world I live in. Mission has been completed.

I choose a large sum of photos for this blog all in order (or near in order) from April 2009 to April 2011. All these still frames speak, they freeze moments in time that I was a part of . People are an important part of the travel experience and most of these photos include people, their faces, their smiles, the remnants of a relationship, be it only moments or extended friendships. Experiencing the world was great, experiencing the world with some of the people I met, whether it be locals or fellow travellers, made it all even greater. The people have interested me, fascinated me, inspired me with their life stories, views, smiles, laughs and their ideas of living. Moments have been bronzed and hung on the shelf in my mind for my own revelry. I have influenced people, made long lasting friendships and have been an important encounter in some peoples lives and vice versa. I guess I learned that people can be amazing in subtle and less spectacular ways. These pictures let me remember, make me smile, make me laugh, they make me feel good inside, these people influenced me and help carve my journey.

I have heard the words, seen the stories on television but never quite believed it. A life changing trip. I underestimated the power of travel, the sights of colours, the smells, the smiles, laughs, close calls, trials, the amount of faith needed, and the personal journey that happens within. My life will be different. Yeah I will be a normal tax paying member of society but my goals have changed, my views on happiness, success and what the words life and living really mean. It is very likely another shake up in my life will be planned, a flight will be purchased and I will be someplace new and inspiring once again. After all the feeling of being alive is addictive, much stronger then anything else I have known.

I survived. I made it home with the need of some personal grooming, clean garments and the need to drop a few pounds after the weeks of food and drink bingeing in England and Ireland, but overall unscathed. I survived bouts of minor illness, serious hangovers, dodgy boats, crazy cabs, long haul flights , small planes, parachutes, floods, hikes, goofy footed snowboards, ball grabbing, snake encounters, bacteria friendly meals, traffic (a few close calls), nights with Phil and Richie in Brisbane, the angry Tram 8 driver, a certain physical altercation in Brisbane, the angry motley crew of lesbians on Cuba Street in Wellington, sangria at El Horno, Rafael's driving in New Zealand, playing with guns in Cambodia, surfing lessons in Western Australia, howling dogs in Kampot, and Mandy's food bullying in Cambodia.

I have a new and foreign ingredient mixed into my life, structure. I have a place I call home, a job, a car, bills, due dates, upcoming events, a circle of friends and favourite places to shop or hangout. I miss the uncertainty of the road. I travelled appreciating every moment of movement. I was aware that I could get injured , ill or receive a serious phone call or email followed by a quick return home to deal with things beyond my control. As Patrick my travel companion in the south of Cambodia said many times during our amazing 2 days “We are living the dream man. Sweet as!”. I miss the dusty streets, I miss waking up to foreign sounds. I miss the different languages, the curious eyes, the landscapes, the smiles, the people pulling at my red beard and the feeling of realizing that home could be a million miles away then smiling about that thought. I miss the uncertainty of the road and the scenes of other peoples lives right there in front of me to view and take what I want when I turn to leave. I can't lie, I miss the road but seem to remain content as I got alot from this trip that keeps me smiling as I do my daily thing.

I don't have time to be upset about the completion of my trip. Plenty of things are learned on the road, and I now know better than to dwell. I have sensations around me, another set of goals to accomplish, hurdles to jump, personal discoveries to seek and randomness to embrace as the roller-coaster of life dips, twirls and changes velocities. I am forever grateful to have been in my shoes and presently be in my shoes. Grateful to hold the passport I do, have the options I do and have people that I can genuinely call friend whatever their location. I have seen poverty stricken places full of smiles. I witnessed other's lives, some moments hurt, some brought joy and many brought a medley of emotions both old and new and good and bad. I received teachings from the rain, the wind, the skies, the sick, the diseased, the smile, the handshake, the crook, the kind offering of a stranger, the scam artist, the Good Samaritan, the shopkeeper and the farmer. Life is a teacher and we are endless students that neglect the teachings by our complicated lives. Living is learning. I lived the last 2 years, learned the last 2 years, but the lessons are far from over but the pace has changed.

The roads of south island New Zealand, the freedom of living in a van, the vibe of Melbourne, the beaches of Western Australia, the Cambodian landscapes and smiles, the meals of Malaysia, the streets of London, the familiar faces of Dublin, the handshakes, hugs and kisses all are etched in my mind. The new emotions that coincide with travel and the feeling of being a child again and seeing the world from a new pair of eyes. I will happily reminisce by myself or via emails, text messages and phone calls with the new friends I shared my travel times with. I am going to use the first two lines of a poem I wrote during this trip called “Clean Pair Of Eyes”
“A clean pair of eyes was the goal
The journey, miles on land, miles within”
I wrote this midway through my trip and now I realize that my goals for the trip have been accomplished. And now, its time to start on the next set of goals. The world keeps spinning, time keeps ticking and life continues.

Thanks Travelblog for the opportunity for me to share. There's 81 blogs, 75,000 words over 1000 photos and 2 years of my life, the thoughts, dreams, adventures, successes, failures and my personal account of it all. I appreciate the questions, comments, advice and support I have received from friends, family and strangers. Life is unpredictable at best but I do foresee another adventure and more travelblogging at some point ahead. The pack is temporarily retired, along with the blogs. Thanks for the support, advice and words of encouragement and a big salute to those still out there living the dream. Lets end on someone else's words, the words of an Irish blessing,
“May the road rise to meet you,
May the wind be always at your back,
May the sun shine warm upon your face,
The rains fall soft upon your fields and,
Until we meet again,
May God hold you in the palm of his hand”

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Comments

[anonymous]

this is so amazing i am totally alost for words as to how we could produce two of the most brillant kids this world will ever see. the fact that you set up a plan and accomplished so much at such a young age is really mind blowing. few people rarely get things done just as they mapped . so far so good it just gets better from here you are a old pro at getting it done and done your way .only people that get to do it thier way are truly happy. but its been said the things we dont plan are usually our best memories. so you got 50 or so years to decide which way is best.i bet it works out about 50\50. you are awesome i am proud to call you my son. love you dearly mom