Getting high in the alps

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Greer & Mark's adventures in Nuremberg, Munich, Garmisch-Partenkirchen, Zurich, and Interlaken

Chapter 1: Interzoo Trade Show
A big part of our journey to Europe was to exhibit at the biggest pet industry trade show in the world - Interzoo. This pet paraphernalia extravaganza is truly mind boggling and at times very disturbing. With the current international trend towards couples substituting children for pets, its not surprising that the pet accessory business is booming. On display were glitzy collars, dog & cat cosmetics, organic food & much much more. These days you can stroll around town with your blinged up pooch in a pram then, while you’re using the thigh master 2000, hook up mitzy to the doggy treadwill for some legwork. Gone are the days of the slightly less glamorous walk around the park!

Chapter 2: Bavarian Beer mania
After Nuremberg, Mark and I set off for Munich to road test their famous beer gardens. And we were not disappointed, spending some lovely warm afternoons in the sun with some fine local brews. Munich has been one of our favourite cities so far with its large expanses of gardens & lakes, chick vibe and Bavarian charisma. There is clearly a lot of money in this place and rare sports cars were just one of the many flashy sights on display (see the video for the other).

Chapter 3: Survival guide for Germany
1. Don’t try and pronounce Munich the german way - give the locals a giggle when you call it the local colloquial name of Minga!
2. Never order a latte machiatto unless you feel like a slight coffee-flavoured foam party
3. If you are gluten & lactose intolerant, be prepared for a mono-cultured diet of white asparagus and don’t forget to say no hollandaise!
4. When the temperature rises avoid using the phrase ‘ich bin heise’. The direct english translation is ‘I am hot” but to germans this means you are feeling amorous.
5. Bavarian beer gardens are ideal training grounds for colloquial german to stay hip with the locals. Plus with every litre of beer comes a boost of courage to let the newly learnt phrases rip.
6. Men in the Bavarian Alps really do wear lederhosen everyday.
7. Germans of all ages and shapes & sizes ride their push bikes everywhere - very inspirational
8. Nordic walking is not a scene from Benny Hill but a form of walking/hiking using ski poles. Even s stroll through the main shopping mall can be Nordic.
9. Pick the steepest mountain you can find and try and work out how on earth they got a chair lift rigged up for a quick jawnt to the peak.

Chapter 4: Survival guide for Switzerland
1. When ordering food at a restaurant expect to wait twice as long to be served and prepare to pay twice as much.
2. Be quiet, very quiet and what ever you do don’t rock the boat.
3. Bring lots of cash, gold, francs, euros, etc
4. Yes, you can get severely sunburnt at the top of Europe in the middle of a snowstorm.
5. For a jaw-dropping experience walk into the Outback Bar in Zurich and order a tinny of Fosters or VB (or Victory Bitter as one Swiss guy called it) for $7 Francs (AUS $7.50). And to make the locals jaws drop tell em what we really think of these beers.
6. Should WWIII break-out don’t panic, every Swiss home in the 70s and 80s was required to have a bomb shelter.
7. Spare a thought for Swiss children - they have the same teacher throughout their primary & secondary school, so think of your worst teacher from school and imagine spending 12 years with them. Not only that but their whole future is determined at the age of 12. Results from their german & maths tests in primary school determine whether they go into the university stream or are destined for TAFE. Tough gig!

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Comments

[Jen]

Du bist Heise!
Ach Mensch!! Meine Gotte! Sounds like you are having a ball! Bring on the beer halls (tip: never try to sit inside) and the lederhosen. The skater was such a find on the camera - and boy are short shorts sexier in lederhosen or what?? Woohooo. Back here we are getting colder as you get hotter and getting more stressed as you get more verschnickered! My advice - stay where you are!!! hehe. PROST!