Absinthe Minded

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And so, freshly depressed after the atrocity that is Auschwitz, we were in dire need of drink...and hijinks...and Prague...

But first, we were apparently in need of a road that could actually take us into Prague. Fact: in medieval times, Prague was protected against invaders by an intricate, complex series of highways and turnoffs that held the Captain, the Professor (kennah), Gilligan (Tait), and First Mate Hawkswan at bay for quite some time. Tricky Czechs...

Eventually, we made our way into the city and found our hostel. It didn't seem that hard, but taxi drivers later proved that it was quite the feat. Our first night we laid our weary heads to rest, in preparation of the utter destruction that loomed on the horizon. Unfortunately, Gilligan had to take off early the next morning in order to tend to his Pollacking duties. That night, we bid him adieu. And Tait? I salute you sir.

And so we move on to day two. We decided to take the time to go explore one of the most exotic and beautiful cities in the world. That being done, we set up shop at a beer tent and commenced the drinking. We in fact managed to create a drinking game whereby one must flip coasters with the top of their hand and catch it in the VERY SAME HAND!! Suffice it to say, the Cap was good, kennah improved, and i sucked huge ace.

The rest of the night is fairly blurry, but I do believe people got lost, people got found, and many an absinthe was consumed. Glorious devil that green fairy be. Not particularly interested in seeing more churches, the very next day we did without the sights but continued onto the very same club - which, might I add is the largest in ALL of central Europe. To this day, I do not know what that means. Basically, the bar had 5 floors, each a different kind of music. I think we all know what floor i got stuck on *cough house cough*.

Now. Correct me if I am wrong, but I do recall stating that we were in dire need of hijinks as well as drink, no? Lemme check...yup, first sentence, its right there: "we were in dire need of drink...and hijinks"

Upon waking up at the club on day 2, completely protected within my beanbag fort, I set forth to our hostel. Upon arrival, to my unsurprise was a very energetic and eager Captain Jones Smitheringerton. Now, prey tell, what are two drunk Canadians to do at 5am in Prague? Well, obviously, the best thing to do would be to offer gifts of fire extinguishers to our receptionist as sort of a 'thanks' for him being him. Who was he? Isaac, thats who.

After being told repeatedly by Isaac, and more forcibly by security, we chose to return said extinguishers to their rightful home and go in search of those beats we kept hearing. We came across the location of the club: the hostel indoor pool. Only one thing stood between us and the pool. One large, white, barred, locked up thing. Now. For those who know me, and I am and forever will be Hulkshaw. Those who know me well, know me more appropriately as Hulkshaw Smash!!.

Now, lets not jump to conclusions, I clearly tried solving the riddle with my brain first - grabbing an ironing board and attempting to pry open this mighty white obstacle. But brains...not my forte. Forte is my forte...(and french puns, but anywho...). With my biceps blazing, my lats flaring, my quads squatting - I ripped open the Gate of Evil and the Cap and I were free to dance to the sounds of P Diddy to our hearts content. From there, I didn't take long before we were inadvertently breaking hot water pipes in an effort to avoid the hammerhead sharks that were attacking us in this very pool.

Our swim being exhausting, we determined it was time to rest in the sauna. Me for 30 minutes. The Cap for 2 hours.

Some other stuff also happened in Prague, but I'm pretty sure I got the best of it. Now, off to Cesky Krumlov, as we were all in dire need of relaxation.

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Photos

The Green Fairy
Not the absinthe, but Kennah

Top 5 square
One of the good ones, based on our criteria of i) Culture, ii) Entertainment, iii) Cafes, iv) Infrastructure

Ancient Clock
The town bosses loved the clock so much they ripped out the eyes of the designer so that he may never make another clock as beautiful!

In da club
One of the few moments the three of us were together

Wine vs beer
Challenged this guy to a chugging contest. Him, wine and me, beer and then vice versa. I have wine stains on my white shirt now.

The White Demon
Successfully slayed

Pool party
Population: the Cap and I

Sauna Party
And later to be the Cap's bed.

Comments

[Richard Hawkshaw]

where's the Beer?
Sounds like you have waylaided your self on those poor czech's... the city will never be the same for the rest of our clan....the noriety you have left for us all... which we will all have to live up too...the pictures on the walls of our clan readying all Hawkshaw's not wanted or served !... now now little bro... I have taught you so much better... you have to have naked Czech girls in the pool with you along with the Sauna... by the way...what is will the clothes in the sauna .. tisk.. tisk....