Patois 101

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In honor of the fact that Nancy and I are now actively pursing higher education in the language of Patois, I thought it would only be fitting to share my enlightened view with everyone out there.

Now, repeat after me:

"Gwan a ya yaad" - Go home. Used repeatedly throughout the day, either to tell someone, literally, to go home, or as a joke between friends; ie - Nancy tells me I smell, I tell Nancy "Gwan a ya yaad."

"Heveryting cris" - It's cool; it's all good. Usually used as a response to "How are you?"

"A do a dem" - As in..."Me look affa Magon and Nancy, ave ya see a do a dem?" I'm looking for Meaghan and Nancy, have you seen the two of them?

"Whey ya gwan?" - Where are you going? Pretty self-explanatory there.

"Me naw no wha ya sey." - I don't know what you're saying. Nancy and I have taken to using this phrase quite often.

"Ave ya see da keys a mi cyar?" - Have you seen the keys to my car? Sofia has taken to using this phrase quite often.

"Ed gon, ed mash up, ed no good" - Literally, My head's gone, my head's mashed up, my head's no good. Said when someone (ahem - Sr. Sofia) repeatedly forgets or loses something.

Now, class, a pronunciation tip to remember: If a word has an H at the beginning, or anywhere in it, for that matter, don't pronounce it. If a word starts with a vowel and does not have an H at the beginning, by all means, please add one. Ex: Hospital becomes ospital. Hungry becomes ungry. Hair becomes air. Empty becomes hempty. Ears becomes hears. Everything becomes heveryting (notice the addition of the H at the end and the omission of the H in the middle). And so on.

If ya naw ave hany queshon, den dis da hend.

Wakud - Walk good - Goodbye.

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