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Published: January 7th 2007
In early November I packed my car and said goodbye to my friends, my apartment and gainful employment in North Carolina to head out on the road. Homeless, jobless and equipped only with a vague agenda for the next six months, I did what any desperate traveller would: I flew to Hawaii. But a man can only take so much warm weather, leisure time and frozen drinks and three weeks later, longing for adversity, I flew home for the holidays and here I sit on Cape Cod. In the absense of any realistic plans I was eventually forced to do what I had been telling everybody that I was going to for months and I booked a ticket to Guatemala City. Since then I've spent my time planning and researching for this three month adventure.
Guatemala has a rich and diverse culture which, according to my preliminary research, seems to center predominently around a dynamic blend of violent crime, parasitic infections and various forms of dysentery. I hear there are also Mayan temples, of course, visiting the temples is not advised due to the detrimental cultural influences surrounding them.
A developing country, Guatemala is, in many areas, vulnerable to natural disasters as well as prone to crime and sub-standard sanitation. I have been warned by various sources* not to travel by car, by bus, after dark, south of the capital, on foot, by taxi, alone, by plane, in crowds, with valuables, in rural areas, in cities or by boat, not to drink the water, eat fresh fruit, fresh vegetables or from food vendors, talk to children, swim, hike, camp, touch plants, pet animals or have sex. For the rare activity that is not explicitly prohibited there is a favorite phrase among the travel writing set, namely, "excercise caution when . . ." This phrase is used when there is a particular danger that you will be unable to identify or prevent involved in an activity that is completely unavoidable. As in, "excercise caution when using restrooms due to a flesh eating virus common to local toilet seats." Ultimately, aside from a liberal application of bug spray and abstaining from stapling hundred dollar bills to one's sleeves the traveller has little recourse but to resign themselves to the probability of getting mugged, pick-pocketed, denguay or yellow fever, malaria, typhoid, Cholera, Hepatitis (A or B), hijacked, lynched, parasites, head and body lice, V.D., raped, killed, rabies, drowned, crushed by landslide, intestinal worms or all of the above.
There is certainly no shortage of literature on the subject to assist a traveller in Guatemala. It is, however, mildly disheartening that the majority of it is in the form of warnings. Here is a brief summary of some other valuable tips for travelling in Guatemala that I have compiled to help aid in
your next excursion through Central America:
- Remember that lakes and rivers are a hotbed for bacteria and parasites. It is best to reserve swimming for the coastline which is characterized by a unique blend of garbage, mosquitos and dangerous undertow.
- A quality insect repellent containing DEET is essential to deter bites from disease hosting mosquitos in rural areas and cities. According to Travax, The Rough Guide, and the US Center for Disease Control, for safe and effective treatment choose a brand that contains less than 30%!,(MISSING) at least 90%!,(MISSING) and no more than 50%!D(MISSING)EET concentration.
- When travelling to popular tourist destinations it is advisable to hire a guide, but be aware that many guides work hand in hand with local bandits and may potentially increase the likelyhood of robbery, or merely flee at the first sign of danger.
- Travelling between cities by second-class or "chicken" bus is a terrific way to experience authentic local flavor and a virtually guaranteed way to get hijacked.
- Many travellers and locals recommend travel by first class or "pullman" buses which are often slightly more comfortable though frequently targeted for highway robbery and unfortunately do not travel between most cities or adhere to any realistic schedule.
- There are several other methods of transportation including shuttles, taxis and even privately owned pick-up trucks which often run regular routes. All of these options are, of course, extremely unsafe (for alternative transport see "chicken" buses).
- Be aware that armed robbers emboldened by a weak and inefficient justice system now frequently attack in broad daylight while it is unwise to travel anywhere at night.
- In the event of a robbery it is important to report the crime immediately to the local police, who are typically young, inexperienced, underfunded, incompetent, corrupt and indifferent.
But Guatemala has so much more to offer than violent crime. There is plenty of non-violent crime as well. A skillful pickpocket may simply slash your pockets, and many theives prey upon the most altruistic of travellers by feigning illness and surreptitiously looting whoever comes to their aid. If you're lucky you might stroll about blissfully for hours before even noticing that you've been robbed.
Why, you may ask, would I want to travel thousands of miles to a place where crime is commonplace, natural disaster is abound and the very food and water are toxic when I could have simply driven to Cleveland? Well, it's simple really. Guatemala has a deeper and more meaningful appeal under the surface that can not be underestimated: it is extraordinarily inexpensive. Besides, how bad can it really be?
Did I mention that there are also scorpions, fire coral and active volcanos?
*Sources include Travax travel health report for Guatemala, The US Government travel website (travel.state.gov), The Rough Guide to Guatemala, Lonely Planet Guide to Guatemala, LonelyPlanet.com, The Environmental Protection Agency website (www.epa.gov) and the US Center for Disease Control and Prevention website (www.cdc.gov/travel). And, no, I'm not joking.
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Ann Aylmer
non-member comment
It's been a pleasure
Yes. It has indeed been a pleasure reading your first travel blog. Beyond that, however, based on what I've gleaned by reading it, it's highly likely that I'll never see you again (at least not in the same condition in which you're leaving) so I just want you to know that it has also been a pleasure being your mom, and I will miss you.