crazy days

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Myself and pete have had a crazy couple of days. I don't know where to
begin.

We decided that we were ready to leave playa carmen and the tranquilo
hostel. The waves had gone a bit rubbish, and as crazy as it sounds, i was getting
boared of having to fill my time sat in a hammock reading or watching cable tv. I watched
all 3 games of the champions league on tuesday and wednesday live on espn. I
didn't travel half way round the world to watch more football than i would
in the uk. I was strong on Wednesday when liverpool were on. I had decided
enough was enough and me and pete would go i search of waves at another
beach instead.

Bearing in mind that it is the rainy season, and we are in a rainforest, it
hasn't stoped raining for the last 3 days. I don't just mean that fine rain
that soaks you right through either... I'm talking proper rain. The roads,
well, you can't even call them roads, the tracks are just muddy rivers. So
me and pete start walking the 3km into the next town where we hope the waves
will improve. After 400m we manage to hitch a lift with one of the local
Ticos. Me and Pete jump in the back of his pickup and hold on to our boards
for dear life. At the same time we are trying to hold on to something to
stop us flying out of the back of this truck everytime we hit a pot hole. We
eventually arrive in one piece.

We walk to the beach and the waves are even more rubbish. There is about 3 rows
of white water, which is about 3ft high, and out back 6-7ft closeouts are
dumping one after the other. We decide to walk down the beach a bit, sit and
watch. After about 5 minutes i had decide that death wasn't on my agenda for
the afternoon and was staying put. "We could go in for a paddle, keep the
fitness up" Pete says. Bearing in mind when i had attempted to surf the same
spot the previous morning, i had got washed 300m round the point within 5
minutes, leaving me to paddle back in over rocks, i still wasn't feeling it.
If you want to go in for a paddle, be my guest, but if you think i am coming
in to rescue you? Think again bro!!
"Shall we go for a beer then?" He says.
That sounds more like it.

When we get in the restaurant for some food and a beer, whats on the tv??
Only the liverpool game. At least i tried not to watch football and go
surfing, but if mother nature doesn't come out to play, what can you do? At
the end of the game and after a very nice calzone pizza, we had decided that
it was definatley time to move on. We would leave for a town called Playa
Dominical, which is about 200km south of Jaco, where we stayed last year.
This is a journey that can't be done in a day, so we would stop over in Jaco
for 1 night on the way.

THe next morning we woke, packed our bags, said our goodbyes and headed off.
Immediately we are faced with a problem. The bus stop is 400m down the road
(sorry, muddy river) and we have two massive board bags that way 100 weight,
and its raining. Luckily we manage to hitch a lift off 2 californian tourist
with a 4wd. We strap the boars to the roof and head for the bus stop. Phase
one complete. Phase 2 was to catch the next bus to the ferry, which is a 2
hr drive. We are waiting at the bus stop and we decide that we may as well
try and hitch while we are waiting. After trying to blag a delivery driver
to take us, a pick up truck comes along. Pete flashes a bit of leg and
flutteres his eyelashes and the tico pulls over. He isn't going to the
ferry, but he will take us 1hr to a village called cobano, where we can get a
bus. Job's a good one!! We throw the boards in the back, strap them in and
jump in the front. There is'nt much room in the middle, so i suggest that
Pete needs to sit there so he can practice his spanish with the driver. He
stupidly agrees and i get to ride shotgun. Winner!!

30 minutes into the journey, pete's arse has gone to sleep on him, and he has
got sevear cramp in his leg from the gearstick digging into him. I'm kicking
back with all my legroom, when we come round a corner to see a bus tipped
into a ditch because the road has collapsed underneath it. We carfully
meander our way through, thinking we were lucky, when it suddenly dawns on
us that the bus in the ditch was probably the one going to come back and
take us to the ferry from Cobano. Bugger!!!

At Cobano we unload and get some cash from the bank. We then manage to get
another local with a pick up truck to drive us the last hour of our journey,
for a small fee. By this point i am thinking we are the bogs dangly bits, this
travelling lark is easy. Pete doesn't fall for my, 'you have to sit in the
middle' trick, so i suffer the last part of the journey with gear leaver up
my arse. We get to the ferry, manage to load our board bags on ok and get off at
the other side. Thats when things beging to go wrong.

When we get off, we can't walk any distance because the board bags are so
heavy, so again my lack of spanish comes in handy, when i suggest that i
have to stay with the bags because he is the only one who can ask where the
bus station is. While he is gone a local kid approaches me and asks if we
need a taxi?
"No we are waiting for the bus" i say, hoping he will leave me
alone.
"Where you going too?"
"jaco"
"The last bus to Jaco left 15 minutes ago"
I'm thinking he is bound to say that, but Pete returns to confirm the same.
"I can call my friend who is a taxi driver, he take you Jaco" The little kid
says.
We give him some money so he can call his mate. He hands the phone to pete
and he wants 25000 colones (abot 25pounds). Pete manages to get him down to
18000 and he comes to pick us up.

There were no roof bars on hte taxi when it arrived, so we strap the boards
directly to the roof, jump in, along with the local kid and head down the
road for the 1 hr trip to Jaco. On the way we talk in broken english and
spanish to the driver and the boy about football. We eventually
arrive in jaco and the accommodation we are staying at. A hostel called
Nathans place.

Nathan is from Texas and is a former lead guitarist in a heavy metal band.
The place comes with a warning that if you don't like to rock and roll, this
aint the place to stay. We get shown round, its not great, but it is the
only option we have, so we pay for a night. We go out for some food and then
head to a bar we used to visit last year to play pool. After a few games we
head back to the hostel as we have an early start to get another 3 hour bus
to Playa Dominical. When we get back we chill out with a few of
Nathans mates that are round. They are the most random people ever. Brad,
who is in his 40's, also from the USA and absolutely barking mad, blatantly
from excessive drug use, starts going on about, i don't even know what.
Nathan meanwhile is playing his guitar like a man possessed. He is really
really good and loving the fact he has an audience, We enjoy the music and head for bed ready to hit the road in the morning, glad we only have to stay one night.

Luckily the bus stop is only 150m round the corner, and the roads are good.
We drag the boards to the bus stop, dump everything in a pile on the floor
and wait. At this point 2 tico women walk up to the bus stop. One of them
bumps into pete and the other starts to ask me when the bus is. Pete walks
off to the supermarket and returns to find his small rucksack has gone.
Obviously those women had distracted us both enough to be able to make off
with the bag. As if that wasn't bad enough, when we get over the shock of what has just happened and think what was in the bag. i pod, 80000 colones in cash, credit card, plane
tickets, digital camera and passport, we realise that things are not good.

We head back to Nathans place, call the cops. I grab a bike and head off down the street to see if i can spot them. We eventuallu end up in the police station for the afternoon, trying to file a crime report to police that don't speak english, me looking through countless mug shots of all the local crack whores. Not the best way to spend an afternoon, but it was still absolutely pelting it down and the surf was pants.

Pete e mails everyone he needs to e mail. He manages to contact everyone he needs to apart from the british embassey, which isn't open till monday. It turns out that due to the weather the road to dominical is closed, so we can't get there and will have to spend a few days in Jaco till we know what to do about Petes Passport.

As we have been forced to stay in jaco at Nathans, that evening we decide to hang out there and try and get a bit more of a feel for the place. We Sit in the front room and get chatting to Nathan.
"What did you do in the states before you came here?" i ask.
"I was in the military for 2 years, then i was in various heavy metal bands, i had a religeous experience and became a minister for 15 years and moved here 3 years ago"
Pete replies "Minister hey? i used to be an alter boy when i was younger, what church were you a minister for?"
" I worshiped and preached the satanic bible" He answers.
Me and pete just look at each other......"Ok?????"
" What might that involve then?"

Nathan then launches in to a huge explanation on how he heard a voice telling him he was god and became a minister. He was into all kinds of black magic, wrong scary stuff that just isn't right. He eventually starts to study more into what he is experiencing and decides from his research that he hadn't actually had a religeous experience, but is a paranoid schezophreniac (Don't think i have spelt that right but hey?). He goes the doctor and tells them this, they run some tests and agree with him. He then realises that if he was schezophrenic the whole time, he didn't actually hear gods voice, so he can no longer be a minister. He also goes on about how anyone that says they have heard a voice from a higher being is either a schezophreniac or on drugs.... and that includes the pope apparently.

As he is a paranoid schezophreniac he is entitled to a disability cheque from the US government, which is how he set his place up over here, and still lives off the $600 a month the government send him. Apparently he is ok now cos he is on medication and once he realised and understood the voices he was hearing wasn't god, but an illness, he got rid of all the symptoms in one go. He then pulls out his guitar and starts playing jimmy hendrix like the legend himself.

Once you just accept the Nathans place for what it is.... which is absolutely crazy, it is actually a cool place to hang. You certainly wouldn't come across comewhere like it in Altricham. There is a local guy called Andre that works here, who is such a character. He is actually pretty sane and speaks excellent english. He is so helpful and will do anything for you. It is actually pretty safe as well, which is good cos jaco is really not very nice.

The surf has been abismal. The water is full of debris and is actually a red brown color because of all the flood water running down from the mountains. Jaco was throwing up 6ft close outs along the beach. I managed to pull into a few of the smaller close out barrels, but didn't make it out of any. I did get a really good left that peeled really nicely. I got it all the way through to the inside then got pitched by the lip trying to come off the top at the end. Although it wasnt great, the surf was enough to get me back on a high after a crazy couple of days that only surfing seems to be able do.

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Comments

[Keith]

Pass by Jaco...
Jaco is good for supplys, but you should of headed south a few kms and stayed surfed in Playa Hermosa. Great break and a some real cheap (and sane) accomadations.