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Published: February 2nd 2009
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Welcome to Ninh Binh
Just as nice as it looks. Leaving Cat Ba Island I went to Ninh Binh to see the land version of Halong Bay: Tam Coc. Ninh Binh was just one of many Vietnamese shitholes and to add to the flavour it was nice and rainy when I arrived. Finding a restaurant, besides all the regular pho places, turned out to be impossible. This eternal hunt for decent food in this country is a constant source of frustration. It ain't easy when you're a picky customer, not keen on trying exotic fly riddled unidentifiable food items on the street (so I'm a princess, what's it to ya!?) I was finally forced to eat at the Xuan Hoa Hotel, where i stayed. A quite overrated place and especially the food. Set menus with tiny portions. Funny thing with the room for five bucks aswell. The vulture that picked me up at the bus station promised me there'd be such a room at the place and he was not lying. However, he forgot to mention that the five dollar room was a storage room with a bed thrown into it... So I haggled down the price of another room, with "beautiful view" MY ASS and "cable-tv" yeah right without all
the interesting channels, to seven bucks.
Anyway, Tam Coc was the reason I came so there I went the following day. It was really beautiful, even more so than Halong Bay BUT so totally tourist infested it semi-destroyed the experience. I got in a boat rowed by some dude but unfortunately they switched by a tiny bridge and a middle aged woman took over with a very jerky style of rowing. We passed through this lovely scenery and three caves. After the last cave some annoying bitch in another boat wanted to sell some crap to me and from there the experience went downhill. Even the old hag rowing me began to sell me some shit she had in the boat and later she had the stomach to nag about tip. "Ha ha, had you not tried to sell me that stuff I might had considered tipping you" I said. Cruel huh? It annoys the hell out of me when some asshole starts giving me the "Hey mistel, you buy!" when I just want to enjoy something beautiful.
My MC-driver took me to some little temple I wasn't to interested in seeing but at least I got to
Entering a cave
One of the caves in Tam Coc. try that weird ass instrument with one string and a whammy bar. Apparently you played it by hitting flageolettes (the musicians will understand that part...) So I managed to squeeze out a little tapto tune on the thing. This time I DID give a little something to the Ho Chi Minh-lookalike monk in the temple, but they were generous too, supplying me with some bananas.
Next up was the Bich Dong Pagoda. Another place I didn't care too much to see, but hey, it was part of the package. This is where I faced the jaws of death! There's a detailed account of this, with nice pictures, on my Swedish blog but I can say it involved a fourlegged animal, blood and me having to seek medical attention. This kind of put me off a bit so I wasn't in the mood for seeing the pagoda. "Fuck this place" I said and told my driver to take me to the next place which was Mua Cave. Yes that's right, I wasn't dying there and then so I could continue my trip.
The Mua Cave was more about a steep and long climb up a million steps up to
a mountain top with a fantastic view. I didn't even see the cave until I got down and walked around the little island in the pond at the place. The cave was not much to see if you're not into feces that is. I'd call it "The Grotto of Shit" instead of Mua as it was jampacked with poop. I guess the local goats use it as their crapper. Maybe something for our German friends who like that sort of thing?* I'd definately recommend this place though for the nice mountain.
So in all it was worth it to stop in Ninh Binh. I just wish I could've avoided the meeting with Death which has caused me a lot of inconvenience... I guess I'll have to fill you in with the details at some point, aswell as with the showdown in Dien Bien Phu, but so much to do so little time... In the meantime check the pictures at my Swedish blog http://motboken.blogspot.com/ and make up your own story.
*You know I love you, my dear Germans. It's all in good fun (but everybody knows that Germans and the Japanese are the kinkiest people in the World...)
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Doh!
non-member comment
Death?
Every dog is entitled to one bite . . .