Day 07 - Revenge of the Chub Rub (Happy Birthday to Lynn)

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Today we started out in Hanoi, a new city with a new guide. Same hot as balls weather, except even hotter and if possible more humid. We didn’t think we could sweat as much as we have, but we are. Hanoi is hotter than Saigon and very different in many ways. We were on our city tour by 9 am with our guide, Tang. He was a very nice guide and definitely one who followed the rules and preached the dogma for the political system of Vietnam. Kirsten quickly challenged Tang on a few political issues right away, and he stuck to his guns. Ho Chi Minh was the great leader, Communism is great, that was his story and he was sticking to it.



Speaking of Ho Chi Minh, did we mention that we saw him? That was the first stop on our day tour, the walk past the body of Ho Chi Minh. The line was long but it moved quickly. The Vietnamese are very efficient and routine. We had to walk in two lines, no hats or sunglasses. You must have long shorts or skirts that covered the knees and have our shoulders covered. There is also no talking or crossing your arms over your chest. The guards would point out and put you in your place. Kirsten learned that she could not talk in line nor could she drop in behind Chester, we had to be in two lines. We were told there are only three leaders that are preserved like this world wide, and Ho Chi Minh is one of them. Our guide was very excited for us to see his past president. All tour long he sang his praises and talked of all the things he did for Vietnam. We took this all with a grain of salt. Again, our guide was very nice, but unfortunately the worst joke teller in the world. One of the jokes he tried to tell us started with, “An American, a Russian and a Vietnamese were headed for the moon . . . “ We are stopping right now because it was so bad. He laughter hysterically about his jokes. Another method of his speaking was to always ask us questions. We literally had no idea about anything he was asking us, we would pose a question, we would throw out an answer and he would laugh and say no, try again. He would ask us to try again several times. We had no answers for him. At one point Kirsten just walked away.

After the viewing of the president, we then went to an un-air bconditioned museum. It showed the different peoples of Vietnam and their culture. It was a very hot museum. Then it was off to another art village where they did all types of handicrafts. We all did some damage in the gift shop there. From there we were off to lunch. One thing we can say about this country is that we are eating a lot! The food has all been amazing. We have had spring rolls every day since arriving here. Spring rolls and soup are served at every meal. We have also had a lot of chicken and beef.

After lunch we had the distinct pleasure of riding in rickshaws peddled by really old guys. This tour was really, really slow. We were in the busiest part of the city, crawling along, with cars and motor bikes coming straight at us, and we just crept along. It was a cool perspective to see the city, but a little scary at times too. The city tour continued with long, hot walks through gardens and around lakes. Tang continued with the history of Vietnam and explained everything to us, of course after he asked us to answer a question several times that we couldn’t answer. We also saw some temples that were a mixture of Taoist, Buddhist, and Confusious. They are all very nice and have a rich history.

We did have a break from the tour for about an hour where we went back to our hotel. We were able to cool down just a little before it was time to attend a water puppet show. This is a traditional show here and it was actually pretty cool. The traditional singing and the music were great. The show consisted of 14 songs that explained tradition and culture of Vietnam. It would have been an even better show if the theater was actually cool in temperature.

We said goodbye to our guide and his bad jokes for the evening. We were back at the hotel and decided we needed to go out and have a drink for Lynn’s birthday! It took a while but we did find a place for some wine and a pizza. It was here that we all three discussed our different phases of painful chub rub. The ladies know what we are talking about. It is just so hot here and with all the walking, if you are not wearing sliders or spanxs, you are going to get into trouble. Baby powder has become our new best friend. Dinner and drinks were great, and the owner even gave us an after dinner aperitif to enjoy. Kirsten, for some reason downed it like a shot, while Lynn and Chester sipped theirs. We had lots of laughs reliving stories from the trip so far. We have had a lot to laugh about in our adventures here.

After dinner we walked back to our hotel, dodging cars and motor bikes when we crossed the street. Our Saigon guide, Nguyen, gave us the best advice about crossing streets, Pick your moment, and never back up, just keep walking to the other side. Never back up! Since it had been an entire day since Kirsten and Chester had had a massage, it was time for a foot massage before home. We stopped at a nice place, how did we know it was nice? They charged $6 for a 45 minute foot massage. It was heaven. Lynn creeped out her girl by staring at her during the whole thing. Kirsten and Chester were quickly deeply relaxed and not paying attention. So, Lynn’s girl decided to make Lynn relax by reclining her seat all the way back so she couldn’t stare at her. We got another big laugh at this because the girl gave no warning and just pulled the lever to recline the seat.

Finally back to the hotel and to packing as we were checking out the next day to head to Ha Long Bay. It was a fun day, and we were talking about how we liked Saigon better and thought that Saigon was a lot less conservative and a lot more relaxed than Hanoi. It was a day to celebrate Lynn’s bday, feel the pain of our chub rub and appreciate our central air conditioning at home.

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