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Published: April 20th 2008
Before we begin, grab yourself a FLASK of tea; it's a long one!
Our passage across the watery border into Vietnam went surprisingly smoothly. We continued to follow the Mekong River for several hours to a place called Chau Doc where we spent our first night in Vietnam before making our way further south to Can Tho. It was here we would encounter our first episode of that struggle (we'd hoped to have left behind) to negotiate our own way through this country without incident.
We were shown to our guesthouse room by a friendly man, who as well as giving us a rundown on the area, offered us a tour that he could put together to see certain things of interest. One of these was a 'Homestay', something we'd already decided that we wanted to do, where you stay with a family on the Mekong Delta and have an evening meal, a bed for the night and breakfast. However, the rest of the itinerary didn't fall into our plans so we said thank you, but no thank you (the trip by the way would have cost us US$105 each, an extortionate amount of money in these parts). This
Mekong Delta
Another busy day on the Mekong Riverdecline led to a cheaper version of a tour being offered, but we again refused. The once friendly man now turned into a spoilt child who couldn't understand why we wouldn't do his trip and said we'd wasted his time. It was a little embarrassing as he continued from the guesthouse reception and onto the street. Unfortunately it wouldn't be the last time someone would decide (in their mind) that it wasn't our choice what to do with our time or money.
Whilst in Can Tho we discovered Vietnamese 'drip' coffee, which is a strong blend of coffee that slowly drips through a filter into a small amount of condensed milk, which before stirring looks like a Guinness in reverse. We didn't realise it was condensed milk at first, no wonder my request for some sugar drew a surprised look from the waitress.........none required!
We arranged our 'Homestay' ourselves, after we declined our next quote of $67 from the tourist office in Vinh Long.
We set off towards An Binh Island in the Mekong Delta where we would join our chosen family. It was a small and very (how can I put this) 'rustic' farm with no electricity
until well after daylight had disappeared, and we naturally felt a little out of place on our arrival. After a wander through the farm we were invited to join one of the men of the family for a cup of afternoon tea which included a sneaky homemade wine (Mitch, your kind of afternoon), the sort that peeled a layer of skin off the back of your throat with each sip. We didn't know whether it was suppose to be a male bonding session but I stopped short of sending Sam out to the paddy fields with the other women. Whilst producing Oscar winning performances pretending to like the wine (which mistakenly only led to top-ups) a woman emerged from the house and walked down to the muddy stream that meandered through the farm and netted a fish. She brought it up to the house and in full view administered its last rites with two hefty blows of a stick.
Later, as we sat in our room with the light fading fast, the kids brought us a candle. The three boys ended up staying a while as we had a crash course in Vietnamese. I played a simple trick that I've
been carrying around since we left for this kind of occasion, which kept them highly amused until we were called for dinner.
Our evening meal, it has to be said, was a banquet - with 7 courses that just kept on coming. Unfortunately, we didn't eat with the family, which is what we'd hoped to do, but they were always on hand to tell us the correct way to eat something and in what order. We still had no electricity at this point and were eating under a small light attached to a car battery, which our host would periodically trip over throwing us into complete darkness, all adding to the ambience.
One of the courses included the fish we'd seen 'battered' earlier. It came out propped up (in the swimming position) having been deep-fried, scales'n'all. We were instructed to pick off the meat from the 'elephant fish' and roll it in the lettuce and mint leaves provided, before dipping it into a chilli sauce, which almost concealed it's dirty stagnant water taste.........mmmmm! Joking aside, it was a very generous helping of food that continued again the next morning at breakfast. Our homestay, boat trips and transport had in total
On the train
Always check ahead before looking back - don't lose ya head! cost us $43, less than a quarter of the price we were originally quoted.
That same morning we left our homestay and went for a little cruise along the canals of the Mekong Delta which took us to Cai Be and our next hurdle which was to try and get a bus to Ho Chi Minh City (Saigon).......it would turn out to be our worst journey yet!!
We did as much as we could to safeguard ourselves from a scam when we were told our bus (the only bus) to Saigon wasn't the 'official' bus. We agreed a price (not too much over what it should have cost), being careful to agree it for both of us and not just one and we even attempted to withhold payment until our arrival, which wasn't even entertained. So there we were, stuck between a rock and a hard place as we boarded the mini-bus.
These 'unofficial' buses have two men up the front (driver & passenger) and one guy in the back who hangs out the side door preying on any potential pickups that this illegal enterprise can snare. It was this guy that once the journey started, turned to us
suggesting we owed almost the whole fare again.
His persistence and aggression made for an uncomfortable initial 20 minutes. The thing is, you never know if these guys are armed, as drug running with these illegal buses would seem to be common due to random searches on the roadside. And even if they're not you don't really want to be dumped in the middle of nowhere either, so although difficult, staying calm is paramount and something Sam does better than me (sometimes).
Luckily he spoke no English whatsoever and his ranting and gesturing was met with our repeated response of "We've already paid", which he didn't understand. His next ploy was to imply that if we didn't pay up he would throw our bags out of the window, to which I implied, if our bags went out the window, he would follow. After an hour had passed, we, and our bags, were thankfully still on the bus, and he had fallen asleep. The main thing that gave him away was that the driver (in our minds) would have pulled over and backed up the threats if he was part of the scam, but he didn't and that gave us the
impression this guy was just trying to extort money from us using intimidation. We knew this would probably continue when he awoke or once we arrived at our destination, and the urge to suffocate the twat while he was asleep was more than tempting.
We were eventually dumped at a petrol station where we were pointed towards a 'proper' bus to complete the short distance into the city centre. Final attempts to extract money from us was now met with the choicest of English slang. So, as we sat on the real bus, it was clear that this guy was, in simple terms, trying to rob us without provocation and we felt so angry that we'd been subjected to it without any reason other than we were Western tourists without the opportunity for retribution - and we were both still simmering as we arrived at the guesthouse......
We stayed in Saigon for four days and whilst there arranged our US visas at the American Embassy: we'll be travelling in the USA and Canada for over 90 days and therefore needed a visa each.
Saigon is loud and busy, with more mopeds than I've ever seen in my life. The
roads are absolute chaos with virtually no order. Zebra crossings are marked on the road but mean nothing. What does mean something is size, and lorries and coaches are the T-Rexes in this concrete jungle, and being a pedestrian means you're at the bottom of the traffic food chain. You're forced to walk on the road as pavement space is taken up by street vendors, small businesses and parked vehicles. The rare occasions the pavement is wide enough to walk on, they then become roads as mopeds use them for short cuts. Crossing roads is a mini-adventure and undoubtedly more dangerous than skydiving or bungee jumping, minus the euphoria once achieved. There are so many, you just have to rely on the bikes being able to miss you rather than your ability to successfully dodge them. It's complete sensory overload (rivalled only by the battlefield) as traffic comes from all directions. Whilst sat in a cafe one morning we counted over 70 honks of various horns in one minute, and I would say that remains pretty constant throughout the day. This rises to a crescendo at rush hour, (although it's hard to distinguish when that is sometimes) as drivers of
all vehicles use their horns to warn all others of their whereabouts and intentions, as well as good old English road rage.
Whilst in Saigon we visited the War Remnants Museum where the story of the Vietnam War unfolds. Interestingly referred to here as the 'American War', the museum is well done and the war is portrayed in lots of amazing and sometimes very graphic photographs. Some areas highlight the atrocities committed by the Americans, including the massacre at My Lai, where three platoons entered villages (without resistance) and slaughtered 504 villagers including 182 women (17 of which were pregnant), 173 children and 37 men over the age of sixty. All who were there were told to keep their mouths shut. A few individuals however, went public on their return to the US. One of which was the only American casualty of these attacks, when he shot himself in the foot in a desperate measure to extricate himself from the slaughter.
Atrocities were not limited to individual platoons; the US government ordered what turned out to be the most intense effort to destroy a country's natural environment the world has ever seen. One of the ways this was achieved
was through the spraying of 72 million litres of herbicide over 16% of South Vietnam in order to destroy the Viet Cong Army's natural cover. One of the chemicals, known as 'Agent Orange' would leave a legacy that would far outlive the war itself. Leaving hillsides bare to this day where nothing can grow, and thousands of individuals killed or disfigured (including American GIs and their children), as unborn babies developed gross deformities whilst in the womb due to one or more parent being exposed to the substance. Scientists (conveniently maybe) have yet to prove a conclusive link, but the stories, facts, pictures and even the donated siamese twins (stillborn) that sit suspended in a large jar at the museum were more than testament to the long term effects of this chemical spraying.
One of the many staggering statistics we read involved the amount of bombs dropped on the Indochina region (remembering that the US also targeted neighbouring countries during secret bombing campaigns)during the war. This equated to 265Kg of explosive for every man, woman and child in Vietnam, Cambodia and Laos combined; that's 450 times the explosive energy of the atomic bomb dropped on Hiroshima.
Whilst in Saigon
we reached the halfway stage of our trip, which means you can all look forward to at least another 15 blogs to read (or not).....many have fallen by the wayside. But undeterred we vow to continue to the end.
We left Saigon on the overnight 'sleeper' train to Quy Nhon, as we started our journey north. After waking on the train at 6am and watching the scenery pass by we arrived at our destination a few hours later and booked ourselves a couple of nights in a small boutique hotel. Now far from the tourist trail, our large room with private bathroom, shower, hot water, fridge, air conditioning, ceiling fan, balcony, and satelite TV would cost us the equivalent of 6 pound-a-night.
Even the mad dogs could not be seen as we ventured out in the midday sun. The place was like a ghost town. And being a Vietnamese resort meant no-one was cooking themselves on the beach (pale skin is the mark of beauty here), and the sea was left to the fishermen in their bamboo-framed hideouts, oh and an abandoned US tank that reveales itself at low tide.
Finding somewhere for a drink was difficult enough, but
getting something to eat felt like you were really putting people out. But as the sun began its descent, the place came alive...
There were street vendors, with their little carts playing Christmas carols as they pushed them along in a kind of manual-festive-icecream-van way. There were numerous games of street football kicking off all down the main sea front road, as jumpers for goal posts were thrown into place. Hundreds of people were in the sea or sat on the beach, while many more walked along the promenade as this mass social gathering grew by the minute. As Westerners we became the focus of attention (and I'm sure gossip) as we ourselves took a walk along the seafront, making the most of the cool air. I can't remember a time when so many strangers have said hello. They came mainly from the younger generations, especially teenagers and kids, but it was friendly and very infectious as one individual's greeting would prompt another's. Some would even shout across the road and others from the back of pushbikes as they cycled past holding on to their rider. It was a nice atmosphere that would continue the following evening.
The next
Fishermen - Ha Long Bay
Tales of the one that got away. stop we decided would be Hoi An, as our push north continued. We thought we could achieve this with a train to Danang, and a short and simple taxi drive to the local bus station where we'd catch the public 'official' bus and complete the journey to Hoi An. No cowboys, No problem...WRONG!
The train was fine, and we hopped off at Danang as planned. As usual, we didn't need to search for a taxi; he found us. We received a confident nod as we handed him a piece of paper with 'bus station' that we'd written on it in Vietnamese, and all seemed fine. As we loaded our bags into the boot of the (clearly marked) licenced taxi, we were approached by a mini-bus driver offering us the complete journey to Hoi An fro $4. Based on previous experience, we stuck with our original plan. Once in the taxi our driver ironically (with hindsight) joked about the mini-bus man being 'Mafia'. As we shared the joke and laughed, he then in turn offered us the same journey for $20, that's 5 times the cost of our planned bus route. Our refusal was ignored as he kept repeating his offer.
When our replies became firmer, he pulled over and whipped out his company's business card and pointed at it in a reassuring gesture of legitimacy. We then did some pointing of our own as we highlighted the sentence in our phrasebook saying it was too expensive, adding we wanted to go to the bus station as agreed. With this he put his foot down and 30 seconds later stopped at the first bus STOP (not STATION as requested) and gestured for us to get out. So, because we wouldn't give him $20 to take us the whole way, he was then refusing to take us anywhere, instead was just prepared to dump us at a bus stop, in the heat with our bags and without shade. It seems as a Western tourist, no matter how much you try, you're destined to be held for ransom by these arseholes. We wouldn’t get our bags out and demanded to be taken to the main bus station. This seemed to annoy him even more as he proceeded to do something completely irrational. Pulling away from the curb he erratically threw a U-turn and began to chase a bus, sounding his horn and swerving
Surprising Cave - Ha Long Bay
Named because the explorers were 'surprised' at how big it got as they entered. in and out of the traffic - he probably thought it would scare us not knowing that we do it for a living….is that all you’ve got mate?! His third attempt at pulling in front of the bus succeeded in stopping it and we (completely amazed at what should have been a simple 5 minute journey) hauled our bags out of the boot of the taxi and into the bus. As the bus pulled away we left him frustrated with the failed scam, and to add insult to injury Sam turned to me and said she’d short changed him - serves him right, greedy twat. In a game of tourist scams we felt destined to lose, we may yet win on penalties!
We eventually got to Hoi An and had a relaxed and enjoyable time. We met a couple, Rob and Lucy, in a bar one evening - Rob a Scouser (and a Red at that), and Lucy with her excitable nature, meant we got on instantly. We would spend the next few nights meeting Rob and Lucy, leaving the bar at kicking out time and going to our respective hotels. Our walk back was interesting as we’d share the
deserted streets, French architecture, and empty riverside market with the giant rats that overran the place at night. Hoi An was a good stop with it’s riverside location and numerous cafes. If shopping’s your thing, there are an estimated 500 tailors in town. If you’re short of cash and miss your designer labels, there are also stalls upon stalls of fakes and rip-offs so you can still look Gucci in ya guesthouse.
Our next stop was Dong Hoi which took us through the infamous DMZ (Demilitarised Zone). It was a short stop with one objective and that was to head underground to see the Vinh Moc Tunnels.
When the Americans came and the bombs started to rain down, this part of Vietnam found itself becoming one of the most heavily bombed strips of land on the planet. The inhabitants of this village therefore chose a new and safer life in an underground maze, where as many as 200 locals lived for six years. The Vinh Moc Tunnels are the largest and the most important of their kind dug during the Vietnam War, stretching for 2.8km. The tunnels are also on 3 different levels ranging from 12m to 23m below
Ugly beauty
Cathedral in Hanoi the surface. The North Viet Cong (VC) found it useful to have a base here and encouraged the villagers to stay. The tunnels were dug with rudimentary tools including bare hands, and were completed in an astonishing 18 months!
We wandered through a good stretch of the tunnels, some of which had dim lighting whilst other parts we negotiated by torch. Amongst other things this underground network included a kitchen, a meeting room, sleeping quarters, weapons storage, a delivery suite (17 babies were born down here), 3 wells and just one karzi; can you imagine the queue in the morning?
There's an eerie breeze that wafts through the tunnels, but the humidity remains high and as several of the exits emerge onto the beach, it was tempting to head straight for the water.
We left the tunnels, and that night caught another 'sleeper' train to Vietnam's capital, Hanoi. Unfortunately only the cheapest bunks were available on this train which means we were in a six berth compartment with three beds on either side. Our beds were the two top ones which kinda feels like you're in a coffin that's missing a side. There's barely enough room to turn over
let alone sit up, and your mattress consists of a blanket placed on a metal tray. Just when we were thinking things couldn't get much more uncomfortable, the music started. Now when I say music, what I'm talking about is that whining noise that they mistake for singing over here. Furthermore, there is no volume control and the speaker being up on the ceiling is closest to us and loud! And to add insult to injury the 'on/off' switch is broken......desperate measures were called for.
Out of the view of our fellow room mates, who seemed to be asleep below us, I searched for the wires to the speaker. Now, do I cut the RED one or the BLUE one?? I had to stop the whining, it was driving us insane, but I didn't want to electrocute myself or stop the train either (Ian, I almost sent you a picture message)......sod it!!....as I yanked the YELLOW wire the music stopped.........mission accomplished!
We settled back in preparation for the next ten hours in our incomplete coffins; ironically we had felt less claustraphobic when we'd been 23m underground.....
We met up with Rob and Lucy again in Hanoi, and after a
few drinks and wandering around the quiet streets (most places shut early near our hostel) we ended up in an Irish bar taking part as a team of four in a good old traditional pub quiz. It was all very surreal and would have been easy to forget where we were with football on the big screen, Guinness on tap and random general knowledge questions being called out over the mic to teams huddled around their respective tables.
For our final few days in Vietnam we booked ourselves on a 3 day, 2 night trip out to Ha Long Bay. This World Heritage Site has been described (like the Ngorongoro Crater) as a contender for the 8th Natural Wonder of the world. It truly is an amazing place that is made up of limestone karsts, like the ones we saw in Thailand, except this time many of them are big enough to be small islands and there are over 3000 of them rising up out of the emerald waters of the Gulf of Tonkin.
Spectacular and mysterious, Ha Long Bay is unique and our cruise and one night's stay aboard a luxury Junk was the most authentic way in
Laughing Buddha
After losing another 3lbs with weightwatchers which to capture the magnificent vistas.
During the day we did some kayaking and went to see some large caves in the area. We had a good group and spent a funny night around the dinner table playing silly games, as well as having the onboard karaoke (no we didn't!) at our disposal; it's practically a religion over here. A lad from Canada also introduced us to the phenomenon of phosphofluorescents, which are algae in the sea that glow in the dark when touched. So at night if you throw something into the water, it briefly glows fluorescent green, apparently very bizzare to swim in as you become illuminous.
Unfortunately, we had to leave the majority of that group as they were only on the cruise for the one night, whereas we were taken to Cat Ba Island for our second. Cat Ba is one of the bigger, inhabited islands and on the way there we were treated to an electric storm that we sailed straight into. This gave the area even more character as fork lighting began striking all around and loud cracks of thunder directly overhead continued as low rumbling echoes in the distance. The sky was really
Not bad for a post office
Saigon (Ho Chi Minh City) dark, but the sea took on a lighter green as the rain came down in torrents. The rain had stopped as we got to the jetty on Cat Ba and we said a quick hello/goodbye to Rob and Lucy who were just finishing their cruise and going back to Hanoi.
There were more caves and plenty of beautiful scenery on Cat Ba, but unfortunately little time. It was a good trip meaning our time in Vietnam finished on a high note.
We said another goodbye to Rob and Lucy on our return to the hostel in Hanoi, as they prepared to move on to Laos and we prepared ourselves for China. All four of us were glad to be leaving Vietnam but equally apprehensive about our next destinations. We wish them the best of luck on their journeys; keep in touch guys.
It's been a long blog, and if you've read it all in one sitting and you're not a member of our respective families, you really must get out more!
So, onto China?
Our apprehension as we make our next big move continues, and it isn't helped by the fact that in the Lonely Planet guidebook they
warn that the authorities in China have an issue with their publication due to their map showing Taiwan as a separate country. The Lonely Planets have been (and still are) a constant source of information for us as we travel, and the thought of losing it as we enter China is more than a little concerning. But with the up and coming Olympics in Beijing this summer we're hoping they're gonna be a little more welcoming than to start confiscating our belongings as soon as we enter the country. But there are no guarantees....
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