Time to relax

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We arrived in Phuket at 12:20am after a traumatic journey from Chiang Mai (I was sick again). Really sad to leave Chiang Mai, and it wasn't helped by the grossness of our airport hotel in Phuket - easily the worst hotel we have stayed in so far, we were really glad it was just for one night. The next morning we transferred to the Shanti Lodge, which was absolutely gorgeous, like an oasis full of beautiful plants and a big clean pool.

Unfortunately Shanti turned out to be an oasis in more ways than one. Phuket is (as we now know) a place infamous for its crap public transport, and in low season if you don't ride a motorcycle you are more or less stuck. Taxis are available, but not as readily as elsewhere (if you aren't in a central area or a beach you have to actually call one, you can't flag them down) and they cost a fortune - around 500 bhat for a short journey, which at the moment is equivalent to 10 quid... more than we want to pay. The owners of the hotel were quite surprised at our reluctance to ride a motorbike when we have never ridden before and the roads are crazy and there is a monsoon, and the first night we had to walk 1.5km, then take an overpriced moto taxi (white knuckle riding) in order to get to the nearest beach area - the nearest place with any restaurants/bars. It was nightime so we didn't make the beach, but it was a nice area, and we planned to come back the next day.

Sadly, this was not to be. David came down with a vicious case of food poisoning that night, and spent all the next days puking. As I couldn't get anywhere without forking out a lot of money or risking getting lost, I hung around Shanti that day. The next day it rained (A LOT), and by that point we were both so fed up we decided it was definitely time to skip Phuket and head for the more accessible and (hopefully) sunnier shores of Koh Samui, having seen nothing of Phuket but still having managed to spend quite a lot of dosh.

In our infinite wisdom we had decided to get a bus from Phuket to Samui rather than fly. I think this was a mistake (although my carbon footprint probably doesn't agree).

At 8:15am we got on a minibus that was so full of people we had to squeeze in the front with the driver, and David was perched on a little seat nowhere near big enough to fit him. After about half an hour 2 guys got off and we were shoved in the back, so that was fine and we slept for a couple of hours until the toilet stop. At the toilet stop the driver starting gesturing emphatically at us and shouting 'Samui Samui!' but David thought he was saying 'Money money!' and got really offended, as we had paid in full. It struck me as a bit odd that he was shouting the name of the destination at us as surely it wasn't a surprise, but it turned out he had decided he was going to Krabi instead, and we had to get on a different bus!
This was a bit weird, and we were concerned they were going to steal our bags or something like that, but the new bus was a big coach type thing so at least we were comfortable. We pulled up in Surat Thani (the mainland where you catch the boat to Samui) at the right time and everything, but before we got to any kind of pier we were unceremoniously dumped in the middle of the road, with cars, buses and motorbikes hooting at us and swerving all over the place. No surprise there, this is just Thai driving.
We managed to get over to the pavement but this was the point we realised - we had no ticket, and no proof that we had paid for a boat.
It didn't seem to matter, as a random guy grabbed us and directed us into a travel agency, where we were told it would be 45 mins until a bus picked us up to take us to the pier (bus number 3 this was). Looking around we spotted 2 girls who had been on our original bus, the bus that supposedly had gone to Krabi! An hour and a half later, a tiny bus pulled up for the crowds of people that were waiting for the transfer. Even with 2 guys hanging off the back and luggage piled a metre high on the roof there was no room for everyone, and we were shoved in the direction of another bus, trying not to notice that our luggage on the roof was a) thrown on like rubbish and b) not even strapped on.
We settled in, waiting expectantly for the pier to loom into view when the bus stopped, and the driver got out and walked off! We had gone less than 100 metres down the road! He reappeared 5 minutes later with a handful of leaves (???) and climbed back in, but only to stop at some kind of roadside cafe 10 minutes later!
Inside was a riot waiting to happen. Its not often you see people losing their cool in South East Asia as it just isn't done, but people were shouting at the guy 'in charge' and he was actually shouting back, at one point advising a disgruntled traveller who'd been there for 3 hours to 'walk off down the motorway, perhaps the bus will pick you up!'
The main problem seemed to be that, like us, no-one had been told what was happening, and as I said some people had been waiting for ages with no explanation. There were maybe 60 people there by that point, and as it was 2:30 it seemed unlikely the boat would be docking on Samui at 4:30 as promised. Eventually another coach pulled up and we were all piled on, with our luggage crammed into the hold. I was sat on the back seat with David and 4 others, so cramped I could not lean back, and the girl a few seats down couldn't either as there was a random pipe coming out the wall at head height! We were on the bus for so long we honestly thought he was just driving around until someone built a bridge to Samui!

Finally we arrived at the pier after about an hour, and by now it was raining. Naturally our bags were dumped on the pavement in puddles and abandoned, as we were just climbing off the bus when someone shouted, 'Quick quick, it's leaving!' and the boat was actually preparing to pull off, despite the fact we were clearly NOT ON. We had to dash across the most perilous gangplank I've ever seen (wet sheet of metal + flip flops + heavy backpack =.....) and ducked onto the boat.... and breathed a sigh of relief.

Thank God we had ferry pickup from our hotel, or I think I would have punched the first person shouting 'Taxi!' at me, and if not him then definitely the second, third, fourth or fifth who obviously don't have the brains to realise that, having said 'NO.' to the first one I probably didn't want a taxi.
Let the relaxation commence.

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Comments

[Mama]

Scary stuff!!
My heartrate has gone up again reading this! I certainly couldn't cope with it-think I'd prefer the zipwires!!Thank goodness I can picture you both now relaxing on a beach........you aren't planning any sky diving are you?!!Can't wait to see you. Mama x