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Published: November 9th 2008
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The building on the right must have been abandoned half-way through construction during the 1997 South-East Asian economic collapse.Day Two - December 1, 2002: Bangkok
After only four hours sleep I awoke to the noisy rattle of the air conditioner above my head, the first motorcyclists of the day starting up their shitbox bikes, and the locals down at street level deciding that the crack of dawn was the perfect time to wake the dead by clanging their pots and pans together. The pumping dance tunes from the swanky nightclub only 30 metres from my window had finally subsided and it was time to drag myself out of bed, limp into the bathroom, and try to make myself look like I hadn't just spent the past 48 hours in a coffin, even though it felt like it. Tony bashed on the door on his way past to yelled out that he would meet me downstairs for breakfast. I headed out into the alleyway, the bar from last night had been packed away and you wouldn't have ever known it was there, and the girls at the 'massage' parlour raised an eyebrow as I walked past in the hopes of snaring another 'customer' before lunch.
Over to the right wing of Suk 11 for the complimentary buffet breakfast
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Barges carrying huge tree trunks along the river. comprising a variety of local fruits and breads. Not bad to get an air-conditioned room with ensuite and breakfast thrown in for about 18 bucks Australian per night. After a good feed and a chat with some of the other fellow backpackers from various parts of the world, we walked back out to the bustling mayhem of Sukhumvit Road. As per another one of those great tips from that email from Tony's mate in Canberra, we headed for the Nana Skytrain station and of course faced the usual molestation from various Tuk-Tuk drivers and roadside vendors. However due to the large numbers of other tourists around, you could just walk behind some fat old German pervert who looked like he had more money than you and they would bother him instead.
The Skytrain was an amazingly clean, modern and efficient transport system, suspended far above street level on elevated concrete tracks. There are a few different lines that run to various parts of the city and we hopped onto the icily air conditioned train headed for the Chao Phraya River. Refreshed after our arctic train ride, we got off the train at the end of the line and walked
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An impressive suspension bridge named in the honor of some Thai King. a short distance to the river's edge and spotted a floating pontoon in the shadow of a large concrete bridge and joined the people who we assumed were waiting for the river taxi that carries passengers up and down the length of the city. Even though it was only morning, my shirt was already saturated with perspiration and my heart was pounding from breathing the smoggy humid air. After a short time, a rickety looking boat which was basically a Thai version of the River Torrens Popeye, pulled up to the pontoon and belched diesel fumes into the river and at us. It was dirt cheap, only 10 Baht (about 40 cents Australian) so we jumped on with all the locals and I got a good spot outside near the back of the boat and finally got my camera out and started snapping away for the first time on the trip.
The Chao Phraya River is a very wide, muddy, choppy and polluted waterway that has swarming traffic ranging from zippy little longtail speed boats to huge barges with massive freshly felled tree trunks on deck. All the locals on the boat were quite an easy going and friendly
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Plenty of boats zooming in all directions on this river. bunch with plenty of hot Thai chicks around which were being picked up loud and clear on Tony's radar. The banks were lined with rotting and buckling timber hovels overhanging the water, looking like they were about to fall into the river, yet I was surprised to see people still living in them. Right alongside these riverbank slums were impressive office towers including the Thai Telecom Building which looked like a 50 storey bulging glass Easter Egg and another building which resembled a greatly stretched high-rise version of the U.S. House of Congress Building. There was also a huge and unusual looking cable suspension bridge which crossed the river and I took plenty of snapshots of.
We thought we would just go to the end of the line, which we thought wouldn't be long, and stay on the boat for the return journey. Nope, the boat just kept going and going and going for about and hour and a half until the city started disappearing and we were starting to get worried and then it stopped and moored up and everyone got off, including the driver and the ticket seller. Obviously this was a one way ride and it
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Dilapidated riverside homes just waiting for the next big wave to collapse them to the bottom of the river. didn't look like there was any other boats leaving nearby for the return journey. We decided to wait and eventually another boat came along and on the way up we spotted a stop near the royal palace so we thought we'd get off there and do a bit of sight seeing on land this time.
The boat stopped right in front of a small undercover market, however we had to balance on thin and flimsy looking wooden boards as most of it had been flooded out for some reason. We reached a busy market square and thought we might catch a Tuk-Tuk to have a look at the palace. We jumped in the vehicle driven by Mr. Ripoffartist (pictured in the left hand frame of this web page). He told us he would take us to see some other sites around the city as the palace was apparently not open until 2pm. This of course was complete bullshit and we should've known better as there was a warning about this scam in that email from Tony's mate. Of course we rode around for a while and saw some interesting things like the giant golden Buddha etc but our tour
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Mr Ripoffartist the Tuk-Tuk driver soon began taking on a more retail theme with every stop being some type of jewellery or clothing store. Apparently the dodgy bastard was getting petrol vouchers every time he brought an unsuspecting tourist to one of these stores. I almost bought a jade elephant for 40 bucks while I was there, but glad I didn't as I saw much cheaper stuff elsewhere later on.
Tony had planned all along to get a business suit made up and when we arrived at a classy looking tailor I decided that despite my limited funds that what the hell, I would get one made up as well. Although they probably had to place an emergency order for extra rolls of fabric when they saw us fat westerners coming. We got measured up and were to come back for a fitting later that evening. It was a nice suit but I still haven't worn it, but $200 bucks is an unbeatable price for a nice tailored suit, shirt and tie. After this we were driven to yet more stores and then Tony's patience began to wear thin and he refused to go in another shop, despite the pleadings of the driver. I
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A typical Bangkok intersection and Tony's knee decided to be diplomatic since we were in a foreign country and everything, and continued to have the token look around in each shop.
When I came out, Tony had obviously had a few heated words with the driver whilst I had been gone. He was sitting in the back seat looking pissed off with his arms folded. I asked him what was going on and he had apparently told the guy he wasn't moving from his seat until the guy dropped us outside the front gate of the royal palace. This of course didn't go down well with the driver and he promptly took us to the palace, which miraculously seemed to be wide open well before 2pm, with heaps of tourist walking in and out. I just jumped out and waited for Tony to finish yelling at the driver. Apparently he was so pissed off he was refusing to accept his money. Tony insisted and we were on our way into the very gaudy looking palace compound. Gold and gem encrusted archways, domes, and halls glistened in the sunlight. However it seemed overkill and almost tacky as you'll see from the photos I took.
We went
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The huge golden Buddha (What more can be said?!) back to the river, on foot this time, and caught another boat back to where we had started and then the Skytrain back to the hostel for a few hours of vegging, drinking beer, and polishing off snack food from the nearby 711 store. We also went to one of the dozens of travel agents within walking distance and booked our air tickets to the capital of Burma (now Myanmar), Yangon (previously Rangoon). It was $190 from Bangkok to Yangon one-way. Yet another rip-off but we were exhausted and couldn't be farked looking for a better deal.
The time came for us to have our suit fitting back at the tailor shop. We jumped in another Tuk-Tuk and whipped out the business card of the shop and luckily the driver knew the shop and we were on our way again. After we arrived at the shop, the driver asked us for the money and after the experience earlier that day, Tony assumed we must be getting ripped off again so he kicked up a stink at the driver and told him he was only going to pay half. After much heated debate over what was only about two or
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Some dude was trying to get Tony to pay him to release this bird in a cage three bucks, Tony decided to check with the tailor what was a fair price and it turned out he hadn't ripped us off after all. Not wanting to admit any wrong-doing, Tony went out there and gave him I think about three-quarters of the fare and stormed back inside the store. The fitting went well and I was impressed that they had a rough cut of the suit ready to go so quickly. Try getting someone in Australia to work that fast.
We caught another Tuk-Tuk back to the hostel and headed to a luxury hotel restaurant nearby. We walked up to the doorman, slightly underdressed in our dusty sandals and shorts holding half finished bottles of beer and asked if we could get in. No problem, they treated us just like any other valued customer and we were soon enjoying fine Italian pizza and pasta. We decided to postpone being all cultured and eating the local foods as we were starving and needed a reliable good feed before another hectic day to come. On our way back to the hostel we walked past someone's pet baby elephant, just standing in the middle of the footpath which was pretty
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Directly opposite the gold Buddha you can see a typical suburban street cool. We had an early night as we had to leave for the airport at about 5am for our flight so we arranged a taxi for that time with the front desk and hit the sack. Tomorrow we would be in one of the dodgiest countries of all, Burma.
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