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Published: December 20th 2005
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Bangkok
One night in Bangkok turned out to be four as we arranged our Vietnam visa and a beach holiday to the South.
The hype that surrounded Bangkok (Oriental City) was lived up to in certain aspects. The ever present (where do they hide) Tuk Tuk drivers were constantly on hand to ferry you from one side of the street to the other, Elephants cruised the high street in the thick of traffic (both pedestrian and road) and the food was out of this world. Even more so than China. We had
been warned that the locals would try and charm you from your money. However, their sole goal appeared to be the complete and blatant removal of notes from your wallet whilst smiling at you profusely (sawat dee). You even had to keep an eye on your wrist to ensure you kept your watch! This was not just shopkeepers, but anyone in the street who thought you needed to go (that instant) to their cousin's business (travel agent, tailor, whatever) for a great deal - "No the post office you are on the way to is actually shut sir. No honest I live here I know better than you!"
We even managed to avoid the Thai national women's ping pong demonstration show for the whole time in the City - despite numerous cards with various graphics and 'special' prices being thrust our way.... All in all an interesting experience but not one we are planning to hurry back to.
Beach break in Phuket and Koh Phi Phi Given our hectic 'lifestyle' over the past few weeks we felt we deserved some R&R and visited Mr Slicky Boy Tours (who gave us (and only us) a special price!) and relieved us from yet more Baht in return for flights and accommodation.
Phuket part one - Karon Beach
Luckily for us, the journey to Phuket included an obligatory stop at the taxi office to stamp your ticket and present their sales staff with an opportunity to convince you that your hotel was shut / crap / full / too expensive etc. (Told you they were keen!) Our nerve held and we made it to beach heaven where we assumed full responsibility for showing the locals what a
red sun tan is all about! Still the ever present cry of Tuk Tuk Taxi was only a heart beat away (even
crossing the road to the beach from our hotel directly opposite) whilst the local ladies were hell bent on soothing your sun lounger aches away with a "massaa for pretty lady".
Koh Phi Phi
We thought Karon (mostly recovered from the Tsunami) had a nice beach (squeeky sand) and clear blue waters until we made it to Koh Phi Phi for a quick island break where, reconstruction is still evident in the town but most of the accommodation in the resorts had been repaired. Despite water and electricity resources not being able to cope with demand pre-tsunami supply and a new government edict controlling all new (and re)construction, George Wimpey would have been proud of the pace that the buildings arose from the rubble!
We stayed in a hill top bungalow (to be on the safe side) at Long Beach where the sand appeared whiter than Phuket (a hard task) and the sea more turquoise and the sound of the thunder on the tin roof was unbelievably LOUD! We snorkelled with sharks and fish (the fish and the mossies nibbled Grace's legs) and along with half of Asia visited Phi Phi Ley where the film 'The Beach' was
set.
Phuket part two
We returned to Phuket to catch up with Ade and Kati on phase one of their honeymoon who were staying in slightly more upmarket digs than ourselves - the hotel even had its own elephants in the grounds dahling! Having snuck in and taken advantage of the fine facilities, Kati and Ade treated us to an evening's entertainment in Patong where we drank and had pics taken with the ladyboys. The surrealest part of the whole experience was hearing what other customers wanted to do with these 'creatures' if they could get them back to their hotels..... The world is indeed a strange place.
Chiang Mai
Our final visit was to the Northern City of Chiang Mai to the Hilltribes and to give elephants rafting lessons!
We rode elephants across jungle terrain and through a local river. Our steed for this epic journey instantly (and constantly) requested bananas or sugar cane (apparently it had been trained in Bangkok). After a quick stop at the jungle 7/11 we were off at a frantic 2-3 mph swaying from side to side through stupid gradients trying not to succomb to sea sickness! We think we
were again conned as not only were we feeding the ever present trunk of our elephant but its baby, "babaar" who was also in tow. Their hot smelly breath in your face was such a treat!
Our 3 day ascent through the hills was in 30 degree temperatures. Any thought that we were fit went out the window as the Flip flop wearing guides replaced elephants and left us in their wake as the trek began. The jungle was not particualrly dense so it almost felt like Winkworth arboritum but with different (and some similar) flora from home. The fauna had to be heard and seen to be believed. Spiders the size of your hand, some so poisonous that they could kill a King Cobra but no flying squirrels could be found for the BBQ treat that evening. We reached the Karen tribe late in the afternoon who were very accommodating to weary westerners and not only provided us with food and shelter but gave us a sing song round the camp fire. They received our rendition of The Prodigy's 'smack my bitch up' with confused enthusiasm.
We shot off early the next morning to visit the tribe
next door, so to speak and checked into the 'Hotel California' for the night, a bamboo constructed jungle camp with natural river shower and obligatory camp fire. The final day saw us retrace steps through the jungle, stopping off for a dip in a waterfall rock pool which we think contained imported UK water (Koh Phi Phi temperature it was not) before the final collapse downhill for rafting. The elephants were off looking for more bananas so our bamboo raft had to make do with us and a local guide for the journey. Gravity / current propulsion was a welcome break and we both managed to stay on as we spotted a large river snake swimming close by. Jeepers!
Our final day in Chiang Mai was back to civilisation and yes, a cookery course to learn the skills in killing off your taste buds through the excessive use of Chilli's! A tenner well spent and a great contrast to the previous 3 days. The addition of Ben whom we met on the hike made the experience one not to forget. It was as if Mark Foskett had joined us for the day.
Goodbye Thailand
Thailand gave us everlasting
memories. The sights and sounds of Bangkok were OK (not great), but it was the in your face people, most of whom appeared to be on the take, that made it a truly regrettable use of our time when compared to the other regions we visited. Thailand's nature, countryside, beaches etc. are breathtaking and made it difficult for us to leave. The hospitality and kindness of the Thai people (and stength of the pound) really reinforced the reason why so many people spend time there. However, Vietnam was calling and by all accounts a tropical depression was on its way. Time to say goodbye Thailand....
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