En Route

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'Ere we go, 'ere we go, 'ere we go!

Well - what a trauma my Monday turned out to be...it seemed every little thing I needed to get done took an absolute age. Poor old Richard turned up right on time only to be greeted by me in a flap and a pile of clothing on the bed. Ever helpful, he took on the little things like synching my iPod and packing up my laptop, leaving me to the HUGE task of choosing which underwear to put into my lovely new Samsonite "Spinner".

• Money = Check
  
• Passport = Check
  
• Clothes = Check
  
• Makeup = Check
  
• Camera = Check
  
• Phone = Check
  
• Foreign SIMs = Check
  
• Chargers = Check
  
• Lipstick = Check
  
• Shoes = Check
  

HOLD ON!!! What about the Hairdryer and the GHD??? Phew, there's room!

The trip from mine to the airport was uneventful and I cruised to the First Class check-in at the BA counter. Not a soul to be seen. Am I too early? Am I too late?!? Finally someone noticed me and I checked in, no need to rush. I made my way to the Qantas First Class Lounge.

The First Class Lounge is stunning, loads of very comfy looking chairs, awesome meals, loads of quality nibbles and drinkies. In other words, my kind of place. I found a very inviting armchair and settled in with the SMH.

Soon afterwards, I realised that the armchair reclined...LOVELY. I thought I'd recline a little and put the feet up. It's hard work being a jet setter after all ;-) This is where it all started to go awry...the chair reclined, reclined, reclined and stretched at the same time. Pretty soon, it was actually too big / long for me. I couldn't put my head on the headrest without my butt being half-way up the back of the chair. If I put my rear in it's allocated parking spot, my head fell between the head rest and the body of the chair. Don't even worry about the footrest part of the scenario.

Never one to leave a puzzle unsolved, I tried pushing down on the footrest to "unrecline" the chair back to Kyley proportions...no go! So I tried pulling on the headrest to bring it back from its orbit around the lounge and back into the reach of my body length. No good! So, not only am I too short for this discerning piece of furniture, but I am too weak to bend it to my will. Like the little red caboose, I finally clambered out of the chair and used all my weight to return it to its original and much more inviting configuration...phew!

After all that excercise, it was time to board. At first the First Class purser thought I was lost, one flash of the boarding card though and I was more than welcome. Here we go! Having flown on all sorts of small and domestic aircraft for the past 4 years I am well used to putting my cabin luggage in the overhead compartment. In First Class however, this is quite a challenging task for the little K. Added to the fact that I was wearing my ballet flats, those lockers are really high - it was a little like being on Romper Room without the bend, just the stretch. Anyway, where was Miss Helena?

Once take off was achieved, it was time to get quaffing. When the likes of Bollinger La Grande Annee 1999, Saint-Aubin 1er Cru Les Cortons 2006 and Barolo Roggeri 2003 are on offer, how can one resist? The food is scrumptious although I have to admit to being a little concerned about the baby carrots that were pod shaped and looked with something the Kents might have fished Clark from all those years ago. Oddly shaped, but very tasty.

We'd been handed out pyjamas upon boarding and I have to say that I was more than a "little" dubious when I noticed the size bore an M. Oh dear me, if I can't reach the lockers without a dog trampoline, what hope do I have of making M pjs work for me? Never mind, it will be more comfortable than sleeping in my clothes. When I did eventually don the nightwear, as expected they were WAY too big for me. I looked like a child wearing their father's pjs rather than a grown woman. Never mind, it did give me a giggle. When I returned to my seat, one of the stewards kindly set the seat to flat and rolled out the matress and doona for me. We had a good laugh that not only did I look like a child in the oversized jim jams, but now I was being tucked in for the night!

The in-flight entertainment is great, with a wide selection of music including Foo Fighters, Sigur Ros and loads of other JJJ / FBI favourites all managed with a touch-screen. I settled in with the paper and Foo Fighters, took in a movie (Oxford Murder) after dinner and snoozed with Sigur Ros and the noise cancelling headphones.

Here I am in Bangkok airport waiting to board QF1, where my seat allocation is 1A. Way-hay! It's off I go again, next stop London!

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