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Published: January 10th 2009
We spent the night in Nong Khai at the Sawadee Guesthouse. A room with TV and A/C ran 400 Baht. We talked with a Brit who was motorcycling his way from Britain to Indonesia. Nice guy who told us that the strangest place he had been through was Afghanistan. We couldn't imagine anyone doing that area of the world solo but then again he was a big guy.
The next morning we took a Tuk Tuk to the Thailand Laos Friendship Bridge. The bridge was financed by Australia and completed in 1994. The Tuk cost us 80 Baht. We shared it with a docile Frenchman who was doing a Visa run. At the bridge we passed through Thai exit customs which took about 30 minutes. Done with that we next had to board a bus for 20 Baht apiece to cross the bridge. There are no walkways and the length of the bridge would make for a long hike in any case. Once on the Laotian side we were given visa forms to fill out. You have to go to the window and ask for them as they are not laying about and you had better bring a pen with
you. Once completed you enter another line for the official visa window. The cost of the visa is $35 US and you must provide a visa photo or suffer an additional $5 charge. If you pay in Baht the cost is 1,400 or $42 US so it makes sense to use dollars. That done you now find yourself standing around waiting to get your passport back. There are a half dozen duty free stores nearby selling liquor and little else. After 20 minutes a small window in the visa building slides open and a hand emerges with a passport. If it's yours, grab it and move on. All of the travel literature says that the Laos visa is a fifteen day visa when in fact it is a thirty day visa. We don't know why this is but we know better than to ask questions at customs. Take your gift and leave. This was but the first in a long series of poor advisories provided by the Laos; Rough Guide. The visa is already pre-stamped so you can bypass the immigration line. On the other side of immigration you are required to pay a 20 Baht entry fee. (Hold on,
it just keeps getting better.) Effective in March the fee is being increased by $2 US. Once you've handed over the money you will now find yourself surrounded by a mob of taxi and tuk drivers asking if you need a ride to Vientiane. Since the town is 24 klicks away you will deffinately want a ride but the price is the issue. Karen and I ended up paying 100 Baht apiece and we were under the impression that we would have the large Tuk to ourselves. Wrong again. As soon as we boarded, Laotians and Thais started joining us in the vehicle. Transport appears to be a Farang subsidized operation. A Laotian female sat next to me wearing the shiniest pair of red spiked-heels I had ever seen. Laos was getting interesting.
The road to town was very good. A wide, asphalt paved avenue lined with large grazing goats. Shops selling bell-shaped poultry cages abounded. There were few cars to be seen but plenty of cows. Most of the vehicles we saw were trucks and Daihatsu mini-buses filled with tourists reading The Rough Guide and scratching their noggins. There were traffic lights at every intersection and surprisingly they
were obeyed. A large banner strung across the road read: Lao International Fair On Education. A nice touch in a country with a fifty percent illiteracy rate. We saw few buildings that were over two stories tall. There were many young monks about who wore brightly colored sashes across their saffron robes. Our driver dropped us in the town's center; a large fountain that is turned on for five minutes once an hour. The Laotian flag flew next to one bearing the Hammer and Sickle in front of the Department of Injustice government building nearby. You never see one without the other. Vientiane was almost completely destroyed during a proxy war between the US and the USSR in the 1970's. Little of the original French colonial architecture is left. You will find a lot of shops selling Thai-made goods at high prices and sandwich carts selling chicken baguettes for 10,000 Kip ($1.18 US). After a look around what little town there was we bought two tickets for the afternoon bus to Vang Vieng (Phanthavon Tours near the fountain). As the agent wrote out our receipts, Tom and Jerry cartoons played on the large office TV. Idle staffers were entranced.
We killed time at a sidewalk restaurant. Karen fed bits of her tuna sandwich to a badly injured cat who wandered around the tables ignored by the Laotians. We soon discovered that contrary to guide book advice you are better off paying in Kip. All prices are quoted in Kip. If you pay in US dollars or Thai Baht you will be hammered with the exchange rate. The official bank rate for the US dollar is 8,500 Kip. If you pay with dollars at a store or restaurant you will get a rate of 8,000. ATM machines charge a 20,000 Kip fee to use the machine and you can take out no more than 700,000 Kip a day ($82 US). The rate on travelers checks is abysmal and you will be smacked with a 3% commision on top. Bring cash and exchange at a bank. Do not use a tourist exchange as they will skim 3% off the top and smile at you the entire time. Kip is king in Laos.
Our bus to Vang Vieng cost us 100,000 per ticket. The ride is supposed to take three hours but actually took four and a half. We had a
standard sized bus. The back third of which was filled with bags of produce. Westerners filled the middle and Laotian women sat in front one of whom had a toddler on her lap. The women were a hoot, yacking loudly with the driver the entire time. If they weren't talking they were popping zits in little compact mirrors. We have seen them on the streets here using scooter mirrors for the same purpose. Blackheads send them to distraction. One woman snacked on a bag of broadbeans tossing the shells out her window into the slipstream. They ended up on the lap of a sleeping German packer three rows back. A pretty Laotian girl dabbed skin lighteners on herself and then spent the next 15 minutes trying to get the bus shades closed to her satisfaction. Light skin is beautiful skin in SE Asia. While Westerners spend hours in the sun tanning, Asian women will not go anywhere during the day without an umbrella or a shawl. Across the aisle from us sat two American girls who practiced their Cantonese badly with a girl from Beijing sitting behind me. Behind them squirmed a handsome Canadian packer. His clasped hands were clenched
tightly between his thighs. We came out of the flats along the Mekong and started climbing the slopes. The road was lined with red tile-roofed Wats. Their walls topped with colored flags. The houses along the way were little more than thatched bamboo boxes about four meters square sporting satellite dishes. The driver layed on his horn frequently clearing a path through the cows that sunned themselves on the roadway. The women turned to comparing handbags with each other. Apparently in Laos, size does matter.
While our luggage resided on top of the bus the Laotian gear lay in the aisle two layers deep. We were in the mountains now. Saw-toothed limestone Karsks stand thousands of feet high covered in greenery. Amazing. The temperature dropped steadily as we gained altitude. Suddenly the squirmer could stand no more. He frantically stumbled over the aisle luggage and asked the driver to stop immediately. After he jumped off of the bus the driver told the women what the kid was doing and the women chuckled not unkindly. He was back onboard a minute later with a huge smile. The driver set off and two minutes later he pulled in for our sheduled
bathroom break.
We had stopped at a market that sold radishes. Big, dirty, white, bunched radishes. The Laotian women bought a load of them and they soon decorated the top of the aisle baggage. The toddler devoured hers uncleaned like an apple. I bought some candy and was satisfied with that. The baby thought me a fool. We pulled into Vang Vieng as the sun fell behind the Western Karsks. I grabbed an expensive bungalow at the Thavansouk Resort right on the Nam Xong river. Spectacular views, hot water, TV and the best bed we have slept in on this trip for 200,000 Kip ($24 US) I know, the view made me silly but sometimes you just have to go for it. Our place sat a stone's throw from the water. After we got our gear stowed we walked up the road that paralells the river. There are a dozen restaurants here all serving the same things. We found one that had a good feel, low pillowed tables and free movies. The food wasn't bad either. Lets talk about food in Laos. It is not cheap. Food prices here are about twenty five to fifty percent higher than Thailand.
If you eat what the Laotians eat you won't suffer too much. If you insist on eating Farang food you will pay dearly. American style burgers will run 30,000-50,000 Kip. Small mediocre pizzas start at 40,000 Kip. A Coke is 8,000 Kip. On the other hand you can get a huge bowl brimming with noodles and pork with a baguette for 15,000 Kip. Fruit shakes are 6,000 Kip. Street stands are cheaper but not by much. Hotels in Vang Vieng are about 20% higher than comarable lodgings in Thailand. Laundry service costs 10,000-15,000 Kip per Kilo. Tuk drivers charge by the passenger and the minimum appears to be 10,000 Kip. Most of the drivers cannot read a map let alone the written word. If you are trying to get somewhere try to have the phone number of your target with you. If the driver has a cell phone he will call the establishment for directions. If he has no phone he will drive around in search of a friend who does. The rates quoted in the guidebooks are a joke and were probably garnered years ago. Laos is more expensive than either Thailand or Vietnam. Bring money, you'll need it.
Things were pretty cheap here until the Thai Tsunami pushed tourists towards Laos. The Laotians learned how to price gouge quickly and stuck with it even in the face of rapidly declining numbers of visitors. Hotels now at 20% occupancy refuse to get off of their rack rates as if things are going to get better anytime soon. They aren't. If they think vacationers are down this year wait till next.
The typical Laotian waiter will give you a menu, take your order and bring your food. After that it's the devil to pay to regain his attention. More often than not you will have to search a bit. He may be back in the kitchen or outside having a smoke or next door watching the football game. I don't think they expect you to ever leave or to order anything else. When it's time to go, wave a 50,000 Kip note over your head and they'll come running.
After waving our fifty we ambled home under a clear starry sky. The lady at the Roti stand smiled as we passed. A warming wood fire burned on the roadside. At the 'College Ethnique' the sound of late lectures
fell from the open windows. That night, under our quilts, the river sang us an ancient and infallible lullaby.
I rose before the sun and walked along the river in the gathering light. I came upon a huge communal garden. Villagers climbed down rickety bamboo ladders to fill watering cans in a steep banked pond. Students from the nearby college bathed in their shorts in the cold river water. A ragged towel more suited to a nesting cat lay draped over their shoulders as they made their shivering ways back to school. As the sun rose it illuminated the western karsks from top to bottom giving the illusion that the peaks were growing out of the river banks. The karsks are limestone ridges that look like a row of gigantic green praying hands. They stretched away to the south along the river as far as the eye could see. The taller karsks exceed 6,000 feet in height. I crossed the river on the misnamed 'Bamboo Bridge'. It is a steel cabled suspension crossing decorated at both ends with a pair of unexploded 250 lb bombs buried nose down. Laotians have loads of unexploded ordnance laying about. They use the
hollowed out bomb casings for flower pots. You'll see them everywhere if you look. Karen and I have one in front of our bungalow holding a Geranium. After paying my 4,000 Kip toll to the troll I crossed the shaky planks to the other side where I found a collection of shacks and small stores. No paving here. I walked a gravel road behind a man driving a herd of Elsie cloned cows to a fallow rice field. By now the karsks were in full sunlight and towered above me. A milky morning mist hugged the ground and hid the herder's dogs as they scampered around the cows. Their paths were betrayed by swaying elephant grass. A line of flag topped poles outlined the trail to the base of the largest karsk. A crude ticket kiosk constructed of sticks had a sign posted requesting 10,000 Kip for admission to a cave there but the ticket taker was not to be found. I traced the path with my eye and decided that my exploring would have to wait. I headed back to Karen.
We ate noodle soup and bread for breakfast at a place on the river road. The restaurant had no name. Most things in Laos appear to have been left unlabeled. Streets have no signs. What use would they be in an illiterate land? The number 111 was written on the restaurant's outer wall so Karen and I simply refer to it as 111. Meet you at 111. How about lunch at 111? What did you think about that sandwich at 111? A small girl in a dirty frock pedaled a Chinese Bigwheel knockoff around the dining room. The sun was blazing hot by this time. Store keepers stayed to the shadows as did we. After breakfast we headed back to our high priced hotel with an eye to move to more economical surroundings.
As we were heading out we spied our next door neighbor gingerly examining his left foot. We asked if we could be of assistance and he said please. His name is Elliott and he had bashed his ankle on the river the day before while celebrating his 33rd birthday with cheap Laotian whiskey and a swinging rope. We were alarmed by an infected ulcer between his toes. Originally an insect bite incurred the week before it was now an infection that involved three toes in a bad way. (Didn't your Mother tell you not to scratch?) We provided him with meds from our mobile pharmacy and told him to get his ass to Thailand for proper treatment. A word of advice: Avoid medical care in Laos. It is worse than doing nothing. The average lifespan here is 55 years. People die fast here from every little thing. If you are visiting Laos bring a supply of antibiotics with you. Supplies of medications are iffy at best. Tend to minor wounds quickly and use bandages. Always use mosquito repellants. Malaria is endemic in Laos. If you do become ill or are infected and clueless as to what to do, get to Thailand.
We moved to the 'Jardin Organique' where we found a very good room for 100,000 Kip on the river. That evening we caught the sunset at a restaurant sporting a wide open terrace over the water. The students from the college splashed in the stream near the bridge for their evening bath. Boys stayed on one side playing grab-ass and hooting at the girls washing their hair on the opposite bank. A trio of saffron robed monks loitered on the bridge staring at the semi-nude bathers in suspended disbelief. As the sun set, a blue dusty haze swallowed the most distant ridges and moved towards us, engulfing ridge after ridge. The ruby sunrays gave the bridge monks a Day-Glo brilliance. The huge karsk I had visited that morning suddenly and violently blew a vast plume of leathery smoke into the Eastern sky like a sideways volcano. Tens of thousands of bats heading out on their appointed rounds. It was over in a matter of seconds.
Note: We are now in Luang Prabang and having a terrible time with Internet access everywhere we go in Laos. WI-FI is a myth here and speeds are numbingly slow. It has taken the better part of 2 days to get this one up and running. As such, you may not be hearing much from us until we return to Thailand on the 19th though we will endeavor to communicate. We are heading back to beautiful Vang Vieng in 2 days time. Today is January 10th. E-mail is no problem so you can always reach us via Noahsdad@aol.
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Ron
non-member comment
Best travel writing I've seen.
Beautiful job of descriptive writing. Thanks.