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Published: April 2nd 2009
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Much has been said about the prevalence of poorly translated Asian tattoos on Western males' bodies, and I know we've all shared a laugh or two over some classic 'Chinglish' translations in restaurants and on signs in this part of the world, but I have finally reached the pinnacle of cross-cultural misinterpretation. What I witnessed HAD to be an honest and unintentional mistake, but even so it was so amazingly bad it just had to be photographed and documented. I'll set the scene... We had been on shoddy trains for 5 hours escaping the dreary town of Solo and heading to the metropolis of Surabaya. Our plan was to change trains there and head to the city of Probolinggo which serves as the main starting point for trips up to a tiny town on the edge of a volcano called Cemoro Lawang. We had been waiting in the heat of the afternoon at Surabaya station for 5 hours when this apparition appeared in my vision. A local family was seeing a relative off on a train - mother, two sons, one baby - and the three that were walking (mum and sons) were wearing matching t-shirts. Now, I'm always on the
THE t-shirt
The best I could manage under stressful conditions. Picture "Mein Kampf" written under the swastika lookout for natty dress-ups for the sole purpose of my twisted sense of humour being satiated, and oh-my-Allah did this family deliver. They were wearing black t-shirts with a massive Nazi swastika on the front with
Mein Kampf printed boldly underneath. You can imagine my shock! I did my best to take a sneaky photo but unfortunately for internet jokers I wasn't able to. Like I said, they surely couldn't have understood the significance of what they were wearing... Anyway, in the place of an excellent paparazzi photograph I have tried to recreate the basic vibe of the shirts on Microsoft Paint. Ever tried to furtively draw a swastika in a crowded internet cafe? No? Don't. It’s really REALLY awkward.
As I alluded to, Solo was a dump that yielded one interesting antique market filled with rare fossils and bones of endangered or extinct animals. Javanese Rhinoceros skull anyone? Mt. Bromo (smoking volcano) was cool. A very dramatic landscape of steam, clouds, sulphur and malnourished horses and their malnourished owners pestering tourists to sponsor their animal abuse (pony rides for fat Chinese tourists). Fam actually found a healthy beast and took it for a ride and in doing so
managed to lose her phone. She was sure she knew where it had fallen so we set out to find it. The first time we tried it yielded nothing so we retreated for an average dinner. On the way back we met the guys that had hired out the horses and they were watching our search. As we left they sped off on their motorbike to comb the area in the hope of finding the phone for themselves. Vultures. Disappointed, but not surprised! The second time was at night with lightning illuminating the sky. We had brought my phone to call hers in the hope that the relative silence would allow us to find it. My phone lasted 1 call before credit vanished. Failure. We retreated again with hopes of waking early and trying before the bus left. We woke at 3am to the sound of heavy rain and thankfully the search was wisely abandoned. I have attached a scale map of Bromo's crater to illustrate the region that we were searching. The red is the town of Cemoro Lawang, the green is the path of the horse ride, the blue is the area we believed the phone to be
Funny poster
A goat candidate for the election in and the yellow contains a scale-sized human being.
We're now in Bali and what a difference to Java and Sumatra. Much space is dedicated in editorials in the other islands to debating the role and value of Bali in current day Indonesia, with many readers and papers asking why it is so popular. Well, despite the rampant (some would say rapacious) tourism that has invaded the island from the early '70s until now, Bali remains a truly magical place. The spirituality of the place is so strong. Not to mention the physical beauty. Wow, I love it here! And Kuta has bars that cater to Australian bogans whose 10 day holiday can't go on without a football match being screened. For a scruffy (I smell) backpacker who misses home, this is a Shangrila-esque destination!
Enjoy the photos 😊
x temps
NOTE: not surprisingly the internet here is slow, i'll put photos up as regularly as I can. For now, enjoy the text!
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