Jai-pour

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Right, Jaipur was rainy so imma sum it up quick coz it basically was a bit of a pants stop gap before the Taj (and also the biggest city in Rajistan but ho hum):

Now I don’t know too many things about Jaipur but I do know that it fucking rained. And I also know hauling-ass around more forts and palaces in the rain – aint so much fun. We walked around a Observatory with a guide for a bit which was completely pointless as there was no sun to see how any of the thingys worked. It was like trying to watch Fear and Loathing when you're not stoned. It just doesn't work.

We still managed to have a bit of a giggle though. My personal fave was the two middle aged western women we saw in matching leopard print rain-macs and white Capri pants. Simply adorable on kids, and still surprisingly adorable on fully grown women. Another highlight of the day was meeting a group of Iranian women. Please check out the photo as it speaks for itself but let’s just say these Iranian women had obviously rebelled against the Quran and the veil to the best of their ability and had recently discovered the joys of make up. Sometimes, make up makes you look worse. That’s all I’m saying. They were lovely though and had asked for our picture – being the aspiration for liberal women that me and Dodds are in three quarter length shorts and a couple of hoody’s , we kindly obliged.

The rest of our day was spent in a very silly mood and Sanjay clearly wasn’t enjoying it. He was in sulky “you don’t like me” frame of mind as we had asked him to drive us to some specific places that we got in for free with our day ticket. They were a bit of a drive away so he got in a little strop. Still, better than him asking Matt about 'giggy giggy' or telling us how nice our legs or eyes look. Seriously: big, fat perv.


Anyway, despite the rain we had some laughs and met a cool couple from Essex that we spent one of our nights sitting with in the hotel reception chain smoking menthols and slagging off all the shit parts of India. Kate (the girl), wasn't a massive fan so had a bit more to say than the rest of us but she was a tough cookie - she wasn't taking any shit. The reason we started talking to them was because she strolled up to the desk, dumped her bags and demanded to see a room with a hot shower. The porters immediately ran over to take her bags and she turned rapidly on her heels (almost in a 360 degree exorcist spin) and held out a manicured but very stern looking finger and said 'leave the bags'. They didn't listen so she then said it again with full on Essex girl force. They soon scarpered. We instantly loved her.

It sort of made us realise that maybe instead of all hiding in the bathroom or pretending to be facinated with the curtains when the porters hang awkardly around waiting for a tip we're not going to give we should just man up a bit and not let them take our bags in the first place. Ho hum, it's provided some giggles - I'm a massive fan of Matts 'ooh look how nice these bed-sheets look, I couldn't possible notice there are three men stood in our room clearly waiting for some money' routine. I tend to do the brash smile and 'thanks then' and pretend I'm too blonde to understand the concept of tipping. Dodds usually goes to take a pooh.

So yeh, that was basically Jaipur, it rained, we got annoyed, we spent a night slagging off annoying Indian touts and drivers and hotel staff (infront of the manager) and got the hell out of there. Bam, shortest blog yet :p

Jasmina Asiapants over and out.

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