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Published: March 2nd 2008
We had decided to vacate Snehdeep with all haste, and in the morning we pack and head off. We are met by a lovely woman and her daughter, and a friendly old man who had been sightseeing in London last summer. We feel guilty about leaving so suddenly, especially as I head outside for a smoke and the daughter follows me. No more than 10 years old, she remarks, in the kind of English that Eliza Doolittle would be proud of, on my tattoos and piercings. 'I will only have henna tattoo!' she says. 'Look at your ear!' and she squeals at the sight of my stretched earlobe. I offer her to put her fingertip through the tunnel and she runs, laughing, back into the house where Maya is telling the old man about Scotland.
We leave, and walk to the main road. Hailing an autorick, we head for the train station, having decided to get a hotel near there. After the usual Southern Death Race 2000 style journey where we cheat death on many occasions by inches, we pay a far more reasonable sum (40r) and head out, on foot, to find a hotel. Accosted by another autorick driver,
at first I say 'No, no, shukria' but then notice he is holding cards for hotels. He recommends the Vaishnavu and we agree to have a look. It is good, and our room has air con (which doesn't work, but it is a pretty box of electronics) and hot shower (scalding hot!), and purple walls and windows that actually allow in sunlight. Struck by the novelty, I am still shying at the 850r asking price and haggle the man down. He balks at 500rs and so I tell Maya to pick up her bag and we'll go elsewhere, knowing exactly what would happen next. 'Ok ok ok' he says, hands in the air, '500 rupees velly cheap.'.
We leave them to sort the room, make the bed etc as we go on the hunt for an ATM. The first is out of order, the second won't communicate with Barclays but the third is ok. I withdraw cash, and we head off sightseeing on yet another autorick.
Narrowly missing an apparently suicidal Sadhu who is meditating in the middle of a dual carriageway, we arrive at the Observatory. Maya has brought us here as she's read about it and
I am impressed. We see the world's biggest sundial, astrological instruments designed to navigate by star paths and even zodiac signs laid out in concrete. I am accosted by a group of Indian men, all eager to have their photos taken with me. I am rearranged for the picture so my tattoo shows, and pose for the pic very self-consciously. Maya laughs her arse off.
Next up we cross the road to the Maharaja palace, and see amazing art, sculpture and tapestry from the times of the Raj. Having a curry in the palace courtyard with beer is extremely civilised, and the curry delicious. We haven't had a bad meal in all our time here so far, and no shits yet either! Then we visit the Water Palace, a beautiful building seated on a bed of water, and I think I spot a croc, although it could have been a stick. Or even a large turd. Maya meets an elephant, we both stroke her multicoloured forehead and move on. We then jump in an autorick and return to the hotel. We eat dinner, once again a delicious curry, and I spot a gecko on the wall. Just as I
Heavy com-moo-ter traffic...
Ooooh it never gets old, that one... point out to Maya that it is hunting an insect, it stops stuck sideways to the wall like a lick 'n' stick toy, and it falls asleep, head drooping towards the floor. What I thought would be an amazing spectacle of predatory behaviour turns into us watching a lizard doing absolutely nothing. Amazing, says Maya. We say our goodnights (or namastes) to the friendly hotel staff, and turn in. For once, without sleeping pills or staring at a fan for hours, I am asleep and relaxed. I even venture so far as to fart loudly after a polite amount of time, only to find Maya is still awake when I receive a whack on the side of the head from the darkness. Ah well. Tomorrow, the monkey temple.
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wow, sounds like youre having a wikid time, finally gettin used to the flow of the subcontinental current! me and eddie fly into mumbai tonight....such apprehensive butterflies afluttering!! youre blog is brilliant. so are you guys. hope to see you out there :D