Hong Kong to The Ashes

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Thanks to the much sought after cash injection, I was relatively confident that I could survive for five days in Hong Kong and a day in Brisbane before meeting up with Matt to collect my cash cards. This I acheived, but by the narrowest of margins.

I hadn't bothered to read up on Hong Kong as I was to spend so little time in the city, therefore I was surprised when upon disembarking from the airport bus outside ChungKing Mansions I was accosted Indian style by hostel touts and I quickly had to revert to aggressive mode to deal with their unwanted attentions.

I was not in the least shocked to notice that the touts were all Indians, as were the "copy watch?", "suit sir?" and "hashish?" mob that congregate in the lobby of the delightful Chungking Mansions annoying everyone unfortunate enough to be in the general area.

After negotiating these annoying little tossers I had the usual argument with the hostel owner, who initially denied all knowledge of my booking. He soon changed his tune when I pointed out my name right at the top of the list right in front of his face. I soon realised from the many huge arguments in reception that confusion is the norm at the Tsim Sha Tsui hostel.

After marvelling at the size of the rooms (about large enough to house a small spaniel) I wandered into the nearest pub for a beer, which cost in the region of five english pounds and pondered that this could be a long few days.

I had the Lonely Planet's "Best of Hong Kong" book, which is the mini version and over the next five days due to the unaffordability of alcohol I must have seen pretty much all that Hong Kong has to offer. I think I could have done it all in three days quite easily as I was rather bored for the last couple of days. In fact the tedium of being poor in HK was only relieved by a night out with a Swedish chap that ended up rather messy and involved narrowly avoiding an incident with a Colombian hooker. Never believe a Swede's interpretation of "just a couple of drinks".

I had no cash or credit cards to shop or eat at any decent establishments, so the time dragged until at last I could pick up my backpack and get the hell out of there, abusing the touts with various English profanities as I went.

The flight to Brisbane was a night flight, so I dosed myself up with Diazepam and promptly fell asleep, blocking the poor immobile chap at the window seat in for around four or five hours.

I was down to my last 70 Aus dollars by this time and had to negotiate strongly with the staff at the Palace (sic) Backpackers to accept a debit card that I didn't even have in my possession in payment for my accommodation.

Thankfully, after an incident with a punctured bike tyre in Noosa, Matt eventually rocked up with my cash cards. Finally, after six long weeks I once again had money at my disposal. So I set about disposing of it, happy to be back in the English speaking (well, almost) world and tout free.

Although the First Ashes Test turned out to be a very disappointing one for England, I had a great time in Brisbane for eight days and Matt and I enjoyed a few entertaining nights in the city. Of course, because of my advancing years, the excess drinking and paucity of sleep led to me contracting a cold, which was an unusual experience in the 30+ degree temperature of Brisbane.

I now have an Australian sim card, so if anyone feels like sending me nice messages to alleviate the boredom of watching England's negative stonewall batting and wayward bowling the number is 0423 138 595.

Off to Adelaide next to meet up with Josh and Tash and hopefully witness an upsurge in English cricket fortunes.

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Photos

HK4
The Swede's idea of a couple of drinks happened to take in this establishment

HK1
View of Hong Kong harbour from Victoria Peak

HK2
This is actual size! There is no more to the room in Chungking Mansions than this. I'd expected as much, but it still has the feel of a prison cell to it.

HK3
Sound advice anywhere in the world

HK5
Maid's day in Hong Kong. Every Sunday the city becomes packed with almost 200,000 maids who sit in the streets, parks and anywhere else they can find and enjoy a day off.

Bris1
Kenny...a legend at The Gabba. Still standing - just about - after seven hours on the white wine

Bris2
An absoulutely shocking photo of a couple of Black Country footballing legends, captured after a couple of hours sleep

Bris3
Once again the scourge of England's batsmen. Glenn McGrath, happily within shouting distance from my seat

Bris4
Feeding the kangaroos at Lone Pine's Koala Sanctuary just outside Brisbane

Bris5
Mother and baby koala, also at the sanctuary