Teacher's Day

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We were not officially told about what went on for Teacher's Day until, well, almost the day itself. We were told that if we were scheduled to teach a class on Thursday during 8th period, then it would be moved to 1st period on the following Monday. This affected both staci and me, so it was good to know not to show up to teach during that time. Instead, we got to party Chinese style.

Whooowhooooo!

I was formally invited to attend two classroom party's, Senior 2 class 0 and 5.

As soon as I walked down to class 0, several other classes got me to promise to attend their classroom festivities. It would be difficult, but I managed to make a presence in more classrooms than I thought I could have originally.

My entrance to class 0 was met with loud roars and cheers, as we are still very much the token foreigners. I took my seat and Harry, sat next to me. At this point, I was still unsure what to expect, but soon realized Teacher Day was more than just giving gifts to teachers. Each classroom, full of 50 students or so, moved all the desks to the side and used the middle of the classroom as a stage to perform various skits, talents, etc. The catch was, often the teachers were expected to perform as well.

First, my students began the celebration with two classmates competing against each other to see who could complete the Rubik's Cube in the fastest time. I have never been able to make all sides match without removing the stickers from the squares, in other words, cheating. These two students had quite the battle, with one finishing about 10 seconds before the other, no cheating to be had.

The class wanted to involve the teachers, so along with Harry, I got up in front of everyone and performed. We were each given famous Chinese idioms, phrases, etc. Without using words, we acted them out for the class to guess. My two performances had something to do with being fat with a big belly (I guess not so hard for me, eh?), so I went around pretending to eat the party food in the classroom and getting a bigger belly while walking slowly around the class. They guessed correctly. Secondly, I acted out the famous tortoise and the hare story. I'm not sure HOW I did it, but it worked.

By this time, it was 4:50pm, and I had indicated that I would visit another class around 4:35, so I scurried over to class 5, where I was quickly greeted with more roars and cheers, and then quickly taken to center stage to sing.

Yes, sing. With every student and some other teachers/faculty looking my way, I had no chance to get out of this, but also had no idea what to sing. Sure, I love the limelight at times, but this was different. I couldn't come up with anything to sing, so I started taking requests.

Matt and Heidi, if you are reading this, you'll get a laugh. The best my class could come up with in requesting a song for me to sing was Mariah Carey - Hero.

For the rest of you, let me just say this- One of the three times I've done Karaoke, I happened to choose a Mariah Carey song. Don't ask me why, but it probably had something to do with being in a bar.

Knowing that in no way could I bust out an a cappella version of this song, I had them come up with another suggestion.

Michael Jackson.

I'm not sure what it was, but maybe the just wanted to see some large white man with a deeper voice sing songs made famous by tiny people that could sing in a high range. With a choice needing to be made,

Having the kids in mind (pun intended) I chose to sing, as requested, some good ol' Billie Jean by Michael Jackson, may he rest in peace.

I got as for as, "Billie Jean Is Not My Lover....She's Just A Girl....." Then I stopped, did a twirl and attempted a moonwalk with a sprained ankle.

There's probably some photos and video footage of my performance, but I’ll most likely never see them, just like I wont be seeing any of the other 500 hundred pictures taken of me while being here.

For the next 15 minutes, I spent going in and out of as many other classrooms as possible. Luckily, no more songs were requested, but I did have to prance around with balloons tied to my ankles. The game was quite simple: try to avoid your balloons being popped, while at the same time trying to pop those of others. I’m actually quite thankful that everyone seemed to avoid my thunderous stomps, as I’m sure the sprained ankle count would have increased exponentially had I made more contact.

Staci, on the other hand, was pampered. Not forced to sing, act, or stomp, she enjoyed sitting.

While on her throne, Staci enjoyed several break-dance performances, not to mention, practically being spoon fed various candies and beverages for the hour. After all, she IS way cuter, and has a much better grasp on the whole saying “no” business than I do.

I met Staci back in the office to debrief the various shenanigans that just occurred, and to look over the various gifts received.

One of my favorite gifts was medicinal. No joke, a student came up to me and said, “This is for you. Happy Teacher Day”, and ran off, leaving in my hand, a bottle of Chinese medicine. Confused, I looked at the box, not being able to read any of the characters. After opening the box, a small hand written note was inside. The note didn’t make much since, but after reading it, it was pretty clear that I could take some awful tasting pills under my tongue and within a short period of time, my sneezing would go away.

Since I haven’t been sneezing, I figured something had been lost in translation. In my classes, I’ve been doing a lot of talking, which has caused my voice to be quite scratchy and sore. The pill bottle had some pinyin along with Chinese characters, so I was able to look it up on the internet. The medicine is called Huang Shi Xiang Sheng Wan. From a website, I discovered it is taken for “Moistening throat, improving voice, clearing heat, transforming phlegm, relieving swelling and relieving pain. Used to treat hoarse voice due to acute or chronic inflammation of the throat”. All in all, a VERY thoughtful gift!

However, one of the ingredients is Semen Sterculiae Lychnophorae. Not to be confused with actual semen, I'm still not quite sure I love the way it sounds, but if it helps my throat during the next few weeks, sign me up for more!

Til next time folks,
Martin

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Photos

Huang Shi Xiang Sheng Wan
The bottle of pills was a gift from a student for Teacher Day. They are supposed to help my scratchy throat.

Note
I found this note in the pill box. Pretty cute.

Comments

[mama clare]

Much more than an apple for you!
A hilarious rendition once again of your special teacher's day! I would love to see the twiol and moon dancing you did! You are certainly providing them with a lot of entertainment and making memories for them as well as you that will last forever! I'm going to show Sonia the pic of the box--she'll know about it too. I hope it helps you. I'm glad to hear you are into your relm there Martin---here's to more joy and laughter, mama

[Grandma]

Drama
Little did you know, Martin, that your avid interest in acting would be put into practice in China. I was amused at everything you came up with. I hope the Chinese pills help your throat. What a help it is for you to be able to check things out through internet. We send our love and will be thinking of you on your birthday.

[Mom/MD]

Well, it definitely can't hurt Martin...but then again, maybe you should just eat the salted eggs that were in the mooncakes you guys received as well...those have to have some medicinal purpose! Wish I had gotten to hear you sing Billie Jean and do the moonwalk on your sprained ankle...definitely an actor!

[Heidi & Matt]

You sure know how to make us smile.
As soon as I read the part about having to sing Matt started laughing, everytime that night starts to fade in my mind I am reminded of the awesomeness of Martin and Mariah together forever. Martin-you'll always be my baby. Doot a doot.

[Jenny]

Oh Martin, so so funny...