Our Trip to Beijing

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Beijing…

(Jen) In Korea we had three days off work to celebrate the Chuseok Holiday. Chuseok is a lunar festival used as a time to honor loved ones who have passed. During these three days the moon is at its biggest and brightest. Many refer to it as the “harvest moon” and they treat is like our Thanksgiving. Everyone stays home with their families and eats lots. Jeremy and I decided we would take this opportunity to get out of town. We booked a group tour to Beijing. I had never been on a group tour before. It had always carried a bad stigma for me and I swore I would not be caught dead following a herd of people behind a bright yellow flag. Well, it turned out we got to follow the bright pink team. Before we really get started I would like to put out a disclaimer. First of all, anyone reading our stories would probably think they we’re the biggest pessimists on earth. Or that disaster follows us. The truth is we have had an amazing time on ALL of our trips. But at the same time, we know that our mishaps are what really make the stories authentic and give you pleasure- whether you all want to admit it or not… So, here is yet another story of our misadventures in Asia.

(Jeremy) I have been on a group tour. When I was 16, my Mema paid for me to go to Europe with a bunch of folks from Hohenwald. Having traipsed across Europe with Hohenwaldians, I thought I had seen all sides of the group tour. I was wrong.

(Jen) We met up with a few of our friends at the Marriott in Busan and boarded the airport shuttle. We had to be up very early so that we had time to get to the airport and get all of our documents in order. The foreign teachers here are mostly Canadian. Seeing as how they hadn’t angered the powers that be in China, they were able to get a group visa. We, as Americans, on the other hand had to pay extra for individual visas. This process is an entry of its own. Anyway, we lined up, got all of our documents and went to check in. I got stuck in the middle seat between a rather large guy and Jeremy. At least the flight is only two hours. The guy next to me forgot to put on deodorant and was becoming more pungent by the second. On top of that, my tray was broken. Apparently when they checked the plane none of the flight attendants had noticed. Every single one of them came by and told me to put my tray up. Explaining to them in English, a language they knew very little of, was quite the fun way to start the morning as I choked on the smell of body odor. Upon arrival, we were ushered (as a group of 120) through to customs and then on to pick up our luggage. Once outside the gates we had to get into groupings according to our flag colors. We were in the pink group and had managed to find most of the group, lacking our tour guide. Finally we found our Chinese guide and our Korean guide. The pink flag was down on the ground and a green flag was in the air. Silly us for not getting to the right spot immediately. We sat waiting for well over an hour as two people were missing. Eventually they found the group and we found out they decided to go change their money and do whatever else they felt like. We were already over an hour behind schedule and it was only about 1pm. At this point, I think we should introduce our tour guide. All the guides worked for the travel agency we all booked through. We pretty much know everyone in the office and they all speak English and have personalities- except ours. She literally said only 9 words the entire time we were on the trip:

1. Fine- when asked how she was doing
2. We’re missing two-, which was quite often said in response as we were trying to get our group together.
3. Six thirty- when asked what time our wake up calls were for
4. I’m not sure- when asked any other question besides those listed above

After we all got onto the bus we were immediately taken to the Temple of Heaven. In order to keep this at a reasonable length I will not tell you too much about it besides it was beautiful. There’s not too much to say about it besides what the websites and travel guides tell you. From there we were taken to see a Chinese acrobatic show. Now we’ve all seen Cirque de Soleil and therefore Jeremy and I were expecting to see much of the same things. Now, don’t get me wrong, every time I see the show I am amazed. I cannot fathom being able to do anything close to what they do with ease. Waiting for the show to start, a woman walked around selling ice cream. The sound of her shrill voiced echoed across the entire theater, “ice cream deeeliiiighttttt!!!” I cannot even try to convey to you they way her voice sounded. It literally sounded like a mix between a wounded duck and a banshee. She was determined to sell every last one of them and must have called this out 50 times before the lights went down. The show turned out to be outstanding. It was incredible and both Jeremy and I were in awe.

(Jeremy) Jen politely neglected to mention that the airplane seat was actually mine. She bravely took it because of the broken tray and her shorter legs, not knowing she would get Mr. Stinky in the process. Brave woman. The flight attendants hounded her mercilessly. My first impression of Beijing was the smog. It was horrible. And the traffic. We had to cross several lanes to get to our tour bus and our trip was almost ended before it had begun by wild drivers.

The Temple of Heaven was picturesque. The elderly are allowed to enter for free so there was a huge contingent in the main square playing music and shouting “long life to the communist party!” The green spaces were amazing and in marked contrast to the concrete jungle of Busan. The temples were circular because it was thought that heaven was a perfect circle. The secular buildings were square. Stairs and courtyards and statues were all in multiples of 9 because 9 is the highest single digit number and thus perfect-in Chinese its name means everlasting. This number was reserved for the emperors, of course. Standing in what they believed was the center of the universe was an interesting feeling, if a bit crowded.

I was skeptical about the circus having already seen Cirque du Soleil, but it was great. The show was very creative with the highlight being a guy standing on a guy standing on a table, both standing on makeshift seesaws that could have slipped out from under them at any moment, with the guy on top using his seesaw as a catapult to fling dishes and utensils on his head. No drops at all. Jerry Rice should have done so well. There was also a fantastic dragon show with two performers per dragon. I made a funny and original comment about how I would hate to be the performer in the back end of the dragon. Jen smiled, but did not laugh out loud. She must not have heard me.

(Jen) Next we were taken to dinner. For our first night there they wanted us to try the delicacy of Beijing; Peking duck. For those of you that have been in any Chinatown, that is the brown animal they always have hanging in the windows. I have had it before and it was wonderful, but something wasn’t quite right about the one we were served. On top of it, we were sat at a large table of people we didn’t know and where the rules of etiquette for the lazy Susan were somewhat blurred. Throughout Asia it is basically Family style eating. Everyone shares, simple enough. After a full day of no food and full sightseeing, Jeremy and I were both scared to put a finger on the table for fear that savages would take it. Needless to say, we were on a compulsory diet the entire time we were there. The only positive thing I can say about the food was that it was better than what we had in Jeju.

(Jeremy) That Lazy Susan spun like a centrifuge and I was glad for the M & Ms I ate at the circus. Although the food was better than Jeju, there was no bread, and I love the bread.

(Jen) Now the best part of out trip- the hotel. After our last hotel, I have to say I was not expecting much. I was hoping for clean sheets and pillows at most. When we arrived in front of the hotel, it seemed like a mirage! After coming to the lobby, I was worried that they had spent of their money on that and skimped on the rooms. We went upstairs to our room and couldn’t believe our eyes! It was almost too much to contain. First, there was an actual bathtub and shower curtain. It was a real bathroom. Now, the bed! It was a king size bed with tons of fluffy white pillows and a down comforter. It only got better; we had real cable. There were so many English channels, including HBO and CNN. I wished we could stay there forever. After living in Korea, this room was like a dream come true! Our bed makes the dorm beds in Sally Hall at Florida State seem like the Four Seasons. At least in Sally the beds were somewhat soft and comfortable. Here we have a very small and hard mattress that is placed on plastic crate like objects and a particleboard bed frame. Oh, the comforts of home. After seeing how nice our room was we decided to stay in. We went down to the convenience store in the hotel and bought beer. They were each about 2.35 RMB and I decided to get a Carlsberg. However, when we got to the register it rang up for 6.75 RMB and I swapped it out thinking it was expensive. As we left the store, I did the math in my head. Yes, I freaked out about spending less than $0.50 on an import beer. It had seemed so expensive though. So anyway, we had fun drinking together and watching TV. The next morning we had to be up at 6:30 so we went to bed pretty early.

(Jeremy) There was also an anti-slipping device for me in the bathroom. No toe breakages this trip. HBO Asia is lousy, though. I had never heard of any of the movies playing. We mostly stuck to BBC World. With all the good news about the war in Iraq and the hurricanes in Florida we were in a really good mood.

(Jen) Another plus to our hotel was the free breakfast. It had everything! We hadn’t had real pancakes since we left home. Although I rarely eat them when I’m home, we could not get enough of them. There was French toast, bacon, cereal, and everything we had not seen in months. After breakfast we waited on the bus. Again we left late because we were missing two. Yes, the same two. Literally, every time we had to meet up as a group to move on, the same two girls were at least fifteen minutes late. First we went to see a jade factory and learned how to tell real jade from fake (when you lightly strike real jade with metal it makes a lovely sound like crystal. Fake jade clunks). After that we went to see Ming’s Tomb. The grounds were huge and we spent a lot of time walking them. It really was quite beautiful. It was also nice to be able to break away from the group. Not that we didn’t love every second of following behind the bright green flag! There was a lot of meaning behind the way the tomb was built. Later our guide explained a little bit to me why everything was in increments of 3’s and 9’s. There was also a spot that was the highest and there was a raised circle they said was the center of the universe. Jeremy and I got a great shot of us standing on it with about 1,000 of our closest friends behind us. Beijing is a city with a population of 18 million. Needless to say, there was no refuge from the masses of people. After waiting for the final two, we went onto the “Sacred Way”. This was a long walk that led to the entrance to the complex of Ming’s Tomb. We had to wait outside of the gate for some time. Apparently there was some sort of mix up they were trying to straighten out. At every tourist site, there is a row of vendors selling everything your heart desires. Cheap Chairman Mao propaganda knockoffs, fake jade, clothes, bags, etc. For the entire twenty minutes we had to wait, women, men and children yelled at us trying to get us to buy from them. No matter where we went, their English was the same. “Hello, pretty lady! I have cheaper, how much you pay, What is your best price, over here…” When yelling wasn’t enough to grab out attention, they rang these horrible bicycle bells and chimed in with “hello!” following after it. One woman directly behind us spent the twenty minutes ringing the bell twice and then yelling hello. Brring, brring, hello! Brring, brring, hello! Brring, brring, hello! Brring, brring, hello! Brring, brring, hello! Brring, brring, hello! Still to this day we can hear it with clarity.

(Jeremy) The Chinese hold the monopoly on cool names. Sure, the Great Wall is not very imaginative but the Europeans named that, and we have the equally blandly-named Grand Canyon. The Forbidden City is my favorite, but at the Ming Tombs we had the Hall of Eminent Favor, the Sacred Way, and Soul Tower. The brring brring ladies were a sharp contrast to the three serene ranges of mountains and all the weeping willows.

(Jen) On the Sacred Way, there are two sets of animals and mythical creatures that were said to stand guard over the dead. One set of the animals is standing and the other is resting. Legend has it that at midnight each night, the animals switch so that each of them gets a chance to rest. We didn’t witness it. We took pictures with several of them. I’m pretty sure the signs written in Chinese next to them said, “please do not sit or crawl on the statues”, but because of our ignorance we’ll never know for sure. At the end of this we waited about thirty minutes for the final two and then went on to lunch. There’s not too much for me to say about the food. Chinese buffet, good once or twice a week, but there’s no need to eat it two times a day for 5 days in a row. After lunch we were taken to the Great Wall.

(Jeremy) The Sacred Way lived up to its name. It was built in the 1400s as a walkway to the tombs. Weeping willows lined either side and we were able to spread out and leave our group behind. We were able to do this because we were wearing hot pink name tags which made us easily identifiable to the Chinese tour leader should he need us. Plus, no matter how leisure our walk, those two girls were always guaranteed to come in after us.

(Jen) The Great Wall was not at all what I expected. I guess I was rather ignorant about it, but I was expecting a high wall. It turns out that the Great Wall is the steepest staircase I have ever come across. We had a couple hours to climb and we were told we could make it through 5 watchtowers. I know it sounds pretty easy, but a high percentage of the stairs were literally thigh high for me. On a few of them it was more like rock climbing than walking with my short legs. We kept climbing, knowing we may never have the chance to climb the wall again. With the population as high as it is, there is quite a bit of pollution in the area. Visibility was not very good at all and as we climbed higher, it only worsened. Eventually we made it to the top and took in the magnificent scenery. It really was quite an amazing experience. Climbing down was so much easier and once we got there we sat in the grass and drank a couple beers together with some of our friends that were on the trip. It was a very gratifying experience. Afterwards we were taken to dinner. At least it was something new, hot pot. I have had hot pot before and it’s usually pretty good. Basically, everyone is given a small pot of broth that is kept boiling over a gas flame. There are several plates of meat and vegetables on the table that you place into you individual pot. It cooks it and then you put the food into a bowl and eat it. It’s always fun to eat with Jeremy. When we first started dating, he was the pickiest eater I had ever known. He’s really good about trying new stuff now and loves a lot of things he refused to try before. For example, he wants Indian food like once a week. Although he has embraced new foods and opened himself to new things, he has yet to master the skill of using chopsticks. He definitely continues to give it a valiant effort, but becomes frustrated with it. Most of the time we sit next to each other so I can pick up the food with my chopsticks and put it on his plate. Occasionally I have to feed him with my chopsticks. It’s quite cute! After dinner we went back to the hotel and basically had a repeat of the night before. We had to get up at 6:30am again.

(Jeremy) I’m not for censorship but my first impulse was to delete the above sentences. However, the truth is the truth. I miss forks. I also thought coming into it that the Great Wall was more of a well, wall. It should have been called the Lofty Flight of Stairs. It took about an hour to get to the top, and the view was spectacular except for the omnipresent haze. I felt an affinity for the poor builders and those who had to guard the posts in the winter. I also was reminded of the Far Side cartoon of the Mongolian invader crashing into the wall and wondering where it had come from. That Far Side was good stuff. In the end, the Great Wall defies description and lived up to the hype. The pictures tell more than words ever could, but we were very moved and felt a real connection to the past.

(Jen) After breakfast, our first stop was the Summer Palace. This was probably my favorite part of the trip. It was really stunning. It had a gigantic manmade lake and acres of forest. We only got to split from our group for a short time, so Jeremy and I made sure to go the opposite direction of everyone else. We climbed a set of stairs that looked like it led up into the forest. We came across a few small buildings where half a dozen people were practicing Tai Chi. I really liked it and we sat and watched them for a few minutes. They didn’t seem to notice our presence at all. I could hardly believe the hordes of people that stood only about 30 feet below because it was so quiet and peaceful where they were. We came back down to meet up with our group. Jeremy and I were standing next to the lake taking pictures of the scenery when someone grabbed my arm. I looked over to see a middle-aged woman. She was motioning to me, but I had no idea what it was she wanted. The man she was with started flashing a camera in my face and with our arms interlocked she was pulling me towards the water. I finally figured out she wanted to take a picture with me. Why, I have no idea. I guess it’s for the same reason random people here decide to take pictures of Jeremy and I. And I guess we will never know what that reason is, although it does make me curious. After this we continued on through the grounds and took a ferry back across the lake. From here we walked to a nearby pearl factory. This was interesting for the first fifteen minutes, but it soon grew tiresome. At this point we expected to be leaving at least fifteen minutes late so we took our sweet time getting back to the bus. We decided to get on about twenty minutes late hoping we would have timed it almost perfectly. But yet again we were still two people short. We must have sat on the bus waiting for the same two girls another 30 minutes. By this point I was over the group thing and knew why it was my first time. There are aspects of it that worked out really well, but I can promise you I will most likely never find myself on another group trip unless it’s mandatory. (Jeremy and I have been meaning to send a thank you note to the perpetually late girls)

(Jeremy) The Summer Palace was also my favorite. I could imagine spending days on the grounds just reading and writing and taking in the peace. It also had some very cool names: the Garden of Clear Ripples, the Pavilion of Bright Scenery, the Long Way, and the Hall of Serenity. The power of the emperors was manifest. There was a huge, huge rock at the Summer Palace that was moved hundreds of miles in pre-industrial times simply at an emperor’s whim. Several died in the moving and the treasury was drained, but the rock was a feng shui necessity, so it was moved. The Pearl Factory was a waste in that it took away from our Summer Palace time, but it was interesting to see a worker cut open an oyster and display the 20+ pearls inside.

(Jen) After our extremely long excursion to the pearl factory, we headed onto the Forbidden City. The entrance was stunning and I was disappointed by how quickly we were being ushered through it because we were so far behind track. Finally at the very end we were allowed to slow down and take some pictures. It was fantastic; we got tons of pictures of the part of the city that is under construction in preparation for the 2008 Olympics! From here we walked to Tiananmen Square. There was a brand new gigantic portrait of Chairman Mao that overlooked the square. There were many soldiers sporadically placed throughout the area whose only job appeared to continually yell at people attempting to take photographs of them. The square was extremely crowded with all types of people. There were many tourists and on the other extreme, there were tons of people bowing to the picture and wearing red armbands. It was an interesting mix of people. I especially adored the hundred people who came up to us trying to sell everything from postcards to cheap Chairman Mao watches. It was late in the afternoon so the mausoleum that houses the late chairman was closed. Jeremy and I were both hoping to be able to go in and see their conservation efforts of Mao. Unfortunately we only had 15 minutes and Jeremy and I both had to use the bathroom. We ran across the square, which is not only crowded, but huge (the biggest public square in the world-capable of easily holding one million). Just as we were able to see the bathrooms, a young guy approached us and wouldn’t stop talking. It was the same thing we always get, “Hello. Where are you from? I am a university student…” For a minute I thought he was trying to get us to join a cult. He was apparently part of a student art exhibit at the museum and was insistent that we come see it. We explained we had no time and promised to visit the next day, which was our only full free day. Afterwards, we rushed back across the square so that we could wait for the final two to arrive.

(Jeremy) The back part of the Forbidden City was beautiful. There were ancient trees and gorgeous landscaping and stories of the emperor walking the grounds hand in hand with his beloved wife. The front part was dull and bland. But it has a cool name. When we hit Tiananmen Square I could only think about that lone protester blocking the tanks back in 1989. It was a moving picture, but our Chinese tour guide claimed the Western media made a mountain out of a molehill. At any rate, it was a sensitive topic and we didn’t go much into it. The Square was crowded but there was an opportunity to stand and take it all in and reflect on the enormity of Chinese history and the Cultural Revolution with Chairman Mao looking out on the crowd and at his body’s final resting place, while also ticking away on my wrist (I bought a Chairman Mao watch-couldn’t resist).

(Jen) After the square we were taken to Silk Alley. This was an experience like no other. There is nothing we could say or write to have you understand quite what it was like. It was crazy. Tons of people were crushed into a thin alleyway with people yelling all around us. Everything you could imagine was for sale. Every person working there was yelling out to passersby hoping to sell them their goods. It was basically the same everywhere we went: “Hello pretty lady. Okay, I give you cheaper only because you are so beautiful, etc.” For those in our group that did not take them up on their wonderful deals, they were told things such as, “You are stupid, you are selfish, and I hate you.” Overall, they were pretty successful tactics. The prices were really cheap and everyone seemed to go into a frenzy of sorts. Even the guys in our group went crazy and bought tons of stuff. It was quite the spectacle. That night we had Mongolian Barbecue. Overall, the food was pretty good and the beer was freely flowing. Jeremy and I won pearl cream (hooray!). Our team was given second prize for “best team.” Apparently, we would have won the bottle of whisky, but we were late to dinner that night. No, the girls didn’t offer to buy everyone in the group a bottle of whisky…

(Jeremy) Silk Alley is a narrow alley about a couple of football fields long with open-air kiosks on each side and aggressive proprietors trying to sell you everything under the sun. The energy was electric and the insults hilarious. I was told I was a handsome man but after I bartered the price down to one-tenth of what it initially was the woman told me she wanted to kill me (in a joking manner I think). It was quite an experience. We had to be forcibly dragged out of there. At dinner, I think our group’s award was technically called Most Honorable Group. To me, it meant that we were always late but they felt sorry for us. The pearl cream is fab. On the way home, we saw a brightly lit T-Square, with fountains virtually leaping into the sky.

(Jen) We went back to the hotel and hung out in our room again. We had a free day the next day. Our plan was to wake up early, go to the square to see Mao’s body, find the underground city, next we would head onto Silk Alley. I’m sure by now you all know nothing goes as planned. We thought ahead and had our tour guide write in Chinese where we were going. At the time it seemed like a flawless plan. That morning I woke up around 7am with severe stomach cramping. I think I ate bad meat the night before at the restaurant. We lay in bed awake for some time and got a later start than we had hoped for. We ate breakfast and took a taxi to the square. We arrived at 10:35am and they closed viewing of Mao’s body at 10:30am. Luckily they reopened on Tuesdays from 2 to 4pm. We decided to change our plan. We would head to the museum first and them go to the Underground City before coming back to see Mao. As we were heading toward the museum we were sideswiped again. “Hello. Where are you from? I am a university student.” (Groundhog Day anyone?) By now I was becoming more convinced that they were actually part of a cult. This was a guy and girl walking together that repeated verbatim exactly what the guy from the day before had said. We told them we would come see the display. Their work was very nice, but we told them we were traveling and had no place to hang art. We continued into the main part of the museum. The museum was huge and ad looked very promising. My parents were right; looks can be deceiving. This was a case in point. Where do I begin? Perhaps we should have known we were headed for disappointment when we found out it was a display of Greek art in China. In a city as big and old as Beijing you might think they would have a lot of I don’t know… Chinese art? As we walked across the first floor only the far right room was open. We walked through and realized that the museum was not set up so that the path would flow freely between rooms. Instead, we had to walk back through where we had come from. We walked to the second floor and it was the same thing. Onto the third where there was nothing more than a toilet and a car(?!) and then finally onto the fourth where we were disappointed to find the same glorious setup.

We quickly moved on from the museum and decided to head onto the Underground City. We had the place written in Chinese and assumed it would be easy to find. However, person after person looked at us as if we were looking for a place as magical as Honalee. Finally a man with a rickshaw shook his head as if to say he knew the way. Not really ready to trust him we declined his offer for a ride. I stopped several people along the way and two out of twenty were a little bit of help. After following several people’s vague hand pointing gestures we appeared to be on the right track. We turned down an alley and we were told, once again through hand gestures, it was just up the way on our left. We walked down the road of the traditional neighborhood before finding the once secret passageway. There are several entrances to it. One is through the back wall of a pharmacy. This one however, was not so secretive. We had to pay a guide to take us down. He was perfect. He spoke a little English and was dressed in fatigues. What more could we ask for? The city spanned completely across Beijing. It included hospitals, temples, a cinema and just about anything you could imagine. Most of it was blocked off, but there was still a silk factory in operation down there. He showed us the silk worms and how they create silk cloth. It was pretty bizarre to find that down there in the middle of nothing. The entire area was filled with pictures of tanks and guns that they had from the U.S. and Britain. It also had tons of pictures of Mao as well as propaganda posters.

(Jeremy) The vast subterranean labyrinth called the Underground City was spawned of Mao’s paranoia that the Soviets would invade Beijing. Our tour guide led us into the maze and there were dripping concrete tunnels that extended into the gloom as far as the eye could see. We were completely alone with the tour guide and it was dark and musty and wet and then as Jen said we popped up in a working silk factory with all kinds of brring brring trinkets for sale. Very strange.

(Jen) We rushed back to the Square to visit Mao’s body. The sign clearly stated that it was open from 2 to 4, but everything appeared to be blocked off. We had no idea what was going on so I decided to ask the guards and policemen standing in the area. When I asked them if we could go in, they simply stated 3 hours or 6 o’ clock. What this meant we had no clue. It was pretty obvious that they were not supposed to talk to civilians, but that didn’t stop me. I decided to take a survey of answers from all the guards standing nearby and assume the most common answer was correct. Finally we came across an Australian guy with an English-speaking guide. They told me they had no idea what was going on either. He did tell us that the last time he had tried to visit it was the same thing. Apparently they opened and closed visiting rights on a whim. There did not need to be a reason. We grudgingly accepted our defeat and went onto Silk Alley. All day long my stomach was killing me. I was in pretty severe pain and so I was in the perfect bargaining mood once we arrived at Silk Alley. Jeremy and I got some incredible deals on everything imaginable. In fact, we finished with all of our Christmas shopping. Jeremy got Diesel shoes for $8 and a North Face jacket for $10. I got Diesel jeans for $8 and a huge leather carry on bag for $10. We decided to check out the night market.

(Jeremy) We got to the night market on a bicycle-rickshaw. It was not a good experience. The poor old man huffed and puffed his way through dozens of wildly speeding cars. Somehow we made it. The night market was six floors of Silk Alley with less energy. We got a few good deals here then went outside and stumbled across some of our group members who were fermenting rebellion.

(Jen) We didn’t want to have to get up early and visit the museum they had planned for us on our final day in China. The other group had already told the tour guide they didn’t want it and instead would have hotel pickup at 3pm. We decided that’s what we wanted too. However, others in our group found out and we created a small revolt. We decided to hold a group meeting back at the hotel.

(Jeremy) Hailing a cab back to the hotel gave us a flashback to Seoul as a crazy recruiter came up and offered us a cab. He said traffic was very bad and the driver would give us an off the meter ride of 80 RMB. We just laughed at him and hailed our own cab-final price: 29 haha!

(Jen) Back at the hotel, the group decided to call off the museum and make Wednesday a free half day. Now, this was no easy task because we had to let our Korean group leader in on the plan. I already said that our leader didn’t have much to say. In fact, she wasn’t a leader at all. I’m not really sure what her purpose was on the trip. Our Chinese guide did all the work and all she did was sleep, open mouthed, on the bus. The night before we tried to leave no one could contact her to tell her plans had changed. We finally received a phone call from a different tour guide at 8am the next morning telling us that the plans had changed.

We were elated that we had another free day to do some stuff. We decided to attempt the mausoleum one more time. We ate breakfast in a rush and then caught a taxi. Traffic in Beijing is like nothing I have ever seen. Bicycles have their own lane and are right next to cars, with a turn lane and all. We finally arrived at 10am. We were slightly panicked that they might stop allowing people in before they closed it. We ran to the front and then around to the side. I guess one of the soldiers could tell we had no clue what we were doing so he pointed us in the right direction. The extreme opposite side of the huge square! We both had bags with us so we sprinted across the square lugging our bags with us. It was now 10:18; we got into the line that seemed a mile long. Just as we got to the entrance a man grabbed us and started grunting and motioning for us to follow him. From his sign language we were under the belief that our bags were not allowed. Of course he was not dressed in uniform or gave us any evidence of him actually working there. We reluctantly followed behind him, back across the street. This street, by the way, looks like the old school Atari game of Frogger. We, of course, were the frogs. There is a large white pedestrian crossing area that is totally disregarded. Cars could care less about people crossing. They simply honk twice to indicate move or be killed. As we crossed the street, he did the “soccer Mom catch” to me in a slightly inappropriate way. We finally made it across the street and to baggage check. After we finished paying to check our bags, we hurried off in attempt to make the cut of time. The man, who spoke no English, motioned to us as if he were wiping sweat from his brow and then held his hand out. We quickly got the gist of what he was saying. I just ran across the street in the heat to help you, now give me money. We said ok. We made it back into line and were on our way. The whole experience was very bizarre. We were being ushered through like cattle. The whole walk through was about a minute and a half. There was a store outside that sold flowers to those who wanted to place them on the casket. They were horribly fake flowers that I can say with certainty are recycled through each day to maximize profits. Mao himself looked like a scary wax figure in a museum. There was a bright orange light beaming down on him that just made the experience even more surreal. It was one of the oddest things I have ever seen. I suggest everyone who visits Beijing experience it for himself or herself.

(Jeremy) Yeah, Mao didn’t look too hot, but it has been more than 20 years. I saw several people bowing to him but no tears. Having lived in Memphis and having seen the effect the King has on people, I wonder what Graceland would be like if Elvis were on display like Mao and Lenin. However, that is of course impossible at the moment since he is still alive. We exited the mausoleum into the waiting arms of government-approved vendors selling all sorts of Mao trinkets. It was like Mao Disneyland. Some Communist regime!

(Jen) We were very happy that we had finally accomplished this task and decided to go get more bargains. I was still having severe stomach pains and thought we might get some more great deals. We headed back to Silk Alley to see if we had missed anything from the day before. We found a couple more things for Christmas and then headed back to the hotel to meet our tour guide. We grabbed our bags and got on he bus. Our tour guide gave us a lovely farewell speech and scolded us for wanting to change plans. He also mentioned be believed we had messed up by missing the lunch he had planned for us. Still unable to stand up straight from the stomach cramping I had been dealing with for days, I scoffed and made a silent promise to give up Chinese food.

The flight home was much better. I sat in the middle seat again, but my tray worked and the girl sitting next to me remembered her deodorant. The worst part about it was the lingering thought in the back of my mind that we were less than 24hours away from being back at work.

(Jeremy) Beijing was a great trip overall. The air was hazy but the people were much more friendly than I expected and many spoke excellent English. We found out fun things like my name in Chinese means Best Lucky Rice and Jen’s means Treasure Lady. We saw a tour bus full of families from America who had flown to China to pick up their newly adopted babies. And we ate delicious pancakes. At the airport in Beijing, we had a little RMB left that we needed to spend, so we bought small portraits of three Chinese characters. There were many to choose from, but we picked Happiness, Harmony, and Love, feeling that everything else would flow from those three. And that is what we wish our friends and family now and always.

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