true love in beijing

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guest appearance by aabeyta!

molly and i used to have stories and adventures. adventures that ended with me passed out on top of peanut strewn tables and molly falling balls out into what must be the most disgusting toilet in asia (and buck nekked no less). it seems that as we sit squarely in our mid twenties our stories are changing. last night ended with me passed out on a leather couch in a rolling stones t-shirt watching beauty and the beast and molly falling, not drunkenly into a toilet, but instead, into the queen size bed in the master bedroom of our high rise apartment overlooking the city of beijing.

oh yeah, and by ten pm, after we had walked the dog and showered. i think we are turning into soccer moms. and while i love a soccer mom, i didn't realize that we were heading down that particular path.

but! have no fear! we intend to change that! we shall charge into the urban jungle of beijing! we shall conquer! we shall dive fearlessly into the unknown! we shall be spontaneous! and DIRTY! we will be reckless! there will be motorcycles! there will be dancing~! there will be dancing on tables! yes! we shall reembrace the naeivity of our youth!

our mottos will be:

"With the naievity of my youth, with my joyous abandon of rock 'n' roll, with my I-don't-care-what-you-think-watch-what-I-do-attitude I will make things happen."

and the ever popular

"Dancing makes you brave!"

yes. we are turning over a new leaf. today! immediately! right now! well, just as soon as we get done doing laundry, straightening up the place and molly finishes purusing the latest issue of The Beijinger while the dog drools on her knee...

this city is unreal. shopping is an extreme sport. EXTREME SPORT. it's like ultimate fighter. dreams are followed, hearts broken, caution thrown to the wind, morals abandoned by the wayside, alliances formed and betrayed. WWF ain't got shit on shopping in beijing. yesterday a pretty asian teenage girl begin my morning by professing her love of my beauty, my good character, our everlasting friendship and her undying devotion. she stroked my face and stared up at me with wide eyed affection and the innocence of true love. but, like so many relationships the imperfections of reality soon kicked in and suddenly we looked at each other as if seeing each other clearly for the first time, i was wracked with guilt, she tore her hair as she spoke of my betrayal, i looked strickenly at her and wondered if we'd ever be able to repair the damage between us. we spoke passionately, she gripped me in desperation but finally i let molly lead me away wondering how things had come to that breaking point. but, she followed me, begging me to reconsider, making concessions,she wouldn't let me go. literally. this delicate chinese girl would not let me go. and there i was, molly on one side and my morning drama on the other side each refusing to let go. molly keeling over from laughter even while she almost removed my arm from it's socket, the girl frantically putting all of her small weight into yanking me back into her stall and me, spread eagle in the middle of a crowded aisle of the silk market realizing that two human beings were actually playing tug of war with me in the middle. i bid fairwell to my dignity and managed to shout out one last desperate declaration, "MY FINAL OFFER IS SEVENTY FIVE YUAN AND NOT A CENT MORE!!!!"

this is around the time we all collapsed in a pile, the girl quickly took my money, handed me my HARD won sweater and claimed that she would spend the rest of the day crying even as the three of us were laughing through our heavy breathing after our struggle. is it any wonder that at the end of the day we end up curled up whimpering and watching disney?

molly though is on the sofa hatching a plan. she like me, is lamenting our crazy youth and has decided that tonight we are going out. not only are we going out! but we are not coming back home. in fact, we are going straight from the clubs to the airport at eight tomorrow morning to pick up ben.

and so, off to tempt that flighty temptress adventure...


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21:27

This is Molly and I would like to say:

dear soccer mom wife
time to reclaim our youth now
cold beer hot shower

chloe's massive tongue
daisy and lion king's ed
love child how's it work?

22:23

i'm watching you wife
curlers in your hair what what?
let's dance the night away

asians stare yanjing
cleavage ass thumping like whoa
dancing waiguoren

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