Conversation Starters

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Hey everybody!

So I have successfully finished my first week of classes... And I have concluded that I have chosen probably the most difficult study abroad program that I possibly could have. It seems like for most of my friends/most of the stories you hear about being abroad, being abroad tends to be easier than school in the US, as school is supposed to be easier in order to give you more time to explore the area you are in and whatnot. Not so much. I average about 5 hours of class per day, with between 5-7 hours of homework per night. It seems like that would leave plenty of time to relax and sleep, but between mealtimes, travel time, procrastination (because it's impossible not to), and time for socializing (which is not usually a relaxing activity for me, as I am definitely an introvert), I probably averaged about 4 hours of sleep per night. Also, besides making my life more difficult by choosing to put in the extra work to continue studying 繁體字 (Fántǐ zì, traditional Chinese characters) rather than 簡體字 (jiǎntǐzì, simplified Chinese characters), I am also taking a culture class about popular music in Beijing^*. To be honest, I would not be taking the culture class if it were not totally necessary for me to be able to graduate on time. The intensive language program is a ton of work all on its own (which is good because it means that I will be learning a lot, but bad because it means I have very little time to rest), and even I can admit that adding a once-a-week, three hour class on top of that is crazy. I have come to the conclusion that I will hate myself by the end of the semester. Did I mention that I've just finished the first week?

^*Side note: traditional characters are only used in Taiwan and Hong Kong, whereas the rest of mainland China uses simplified characters. Because my professor in the US is Taiwanese, she made the 100 level classes learn traditional (you could choose to switch in 200). However, I continued studying 繁體字 because I want to keep my options open for the future. Since mainland Chinese use 簡體字, my textbook is in simplified characters so along with learning how to write characters in traditional, I am (slowly) learning how to read simplified characters. Words like 聽 (听), or 這(这), 還(还), and 過 (过) make my life difficult though...

On a different note, because of the celebration of Victory Day (the day that marked the end of Japanese occupation during the second world war) here in China, we did not have classes on Friday. Three cheers for three day weekends! Anyways, on Friday I went out with some of my classmates to a bar and then to a dancing club (I've never been to either before, so it was a new experience for me). Although I think the legal drinking age in China is technically 18, it's not at all enforced, and alcohol is VERY available/cheap. I would like to mention that it is a personal choice of mine not to drink alcohol at all, although I don't mind when people drink around me, and I actually had a pretty good time, even though I was the only sober one there. I'm not sure if bars/clubs in the US are like this, but here it seems like hookah is also always available for purchase. My classmates indulged a bit in that along with what seemed like copious amounts of alcohol. Speaking of alcohol, it is crazy available on campus! Back in the US it is against campus policy to have alcohol on campus property or to drink it in the dorms. However, here we have a small convenience store inside the dorm building, and they sell beer and liquor, no ID necessary. You can also use your student ID card (which is used to buy food at various places on campus) to buy giant bottles of beer at the dining hall. And they're cheaper if you plan on staying in the dining hall to drink them (because they get money back for recycling the bottles). I was definitely very surprised at how available all forms of alcohol are here.

One of our recurring assignments for Chinese class is to interview people concerning various topics (twice a week, to be precise). We also had to do interviews for our popular culture class (ask five people four questions), so I met up with classmates on both Friday and Saturday to work on that. We chose to go to the cafe on the fourth floor of the dining hall, where many of the students hang out and study. Although it's always crazy intimidating approaching people, and I hate feeling like I am interrupting people, I will say that I met some very nice people this weekend. I was pleasantly surprised at how many people were willing to listen to me stutter through my questions and answer them, and then after most I had some very nice conversations, although there was a lot of switching between English and Chinese on both sides. Although the process takes a lot of time (especially considering how long I sit there trying to talk myself into approaching someone), I think it's a good way to kind of force us out of our comfort zones, and I feel like I've met some cool people just by using the interview as a conversation starter.

Kind of on the same note, I had the strangest thing happen to me yesterday while in the cafe. So after I finished my interview, I remained in the cafe with some classmates working on the readings for my music class. The afternoon somehow passed me by and day turned into evening, and I still hadn't finished the reading. My classmates decided to go downstairs to get some food, because one of them was so hungry he was shaking. I told them I would meet them down there once I had finished my reading, because the only thing worse than boring class reading is to stop when you are almost done and then have to return to it later. And I was definitely close enough to finished that I really just wanted to finish it up before going downstairs. However, not even five minutes after my classmates left, a Chinese guy came to the table I was sitting at and asked if I was Chinese and if he could talk to me for a bit. I told him I was American, but that it was okay with me if he wanted to talk. He was very surprised that I was American (a response I get a lot - he had been sitting behind me for a while and had thought I was a Chinese student hanging out with foreign friends), but sat down and we talked for a bit. Very early on in the conversation it became apparent that he was flirting with me (which I honestly don't have happen to me, so I had no idea how to react). It was super awkward, but I kept talking with him. Once I explained to him that I was adopted, he talked a bit about how lucky I am (I agree), and how he thinks that my being adopted means that I have more opportunities than the average Chinese person. A couple of times he offered to buy me a drink from the cafe (which are not cheap. The drinks in the cafe are comparable to the prices of alcohol at the clubs), which I declined as politely as I could. Overall it was just a super awkward conversation, especially since he kept adding things like "I would be happy if you were in Beijing longer" (in response to my telling him I will only be in Beijing until December), or "oh wow you're so young!" (in response to telling him that I am 20 - he was 28), or "why are you going to Kunming to study politics? You could study politics in Beijing," etc. So awkward. At the end of our conversation, he asked if he could take a picture with me (which he posted to WeChat - he had asked to add me earlier in conversation), and told me that if I had any free time and wanted to go out he would buy me a drink or buy me dinner. He also mentioned he would like to practice his English with me, which I think is probably the only reason I will meet with him again later - most likely with friends along. But oh my goodness that was so awkward. And the fact that I've never had a guy approach me like that before only made it more so. But he was nice (if too old for me), so I might contact him later or meet up with him if he contacts me. When I told my friends about it later, one of them mentioned that he had noticed the guy looking back at our table quite a bit, although he had thought it was just interest in the fact that we were speaking English. Nope! But I guess now I can say that I've officially been hit on by a native. Yay...?

That's all for now, but I will talk to you all next week!

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Photos

Out on the town
With Jude Poku

Alcohol is so available
With namless new friend and Ian Faulkner

Studying hard!
With Kyle (a new friend met through the interview process) and Olayinka

Comments

[Terry May]

Hey, I was 28 once (yeah, like 40 years ago)
Yep, you're right - he was hitting on you. And 28! OMG, he has one foot in the grave already - he's just looking for someone to care for him in his old age. OK, i'll stop with the 'old' jokes. So, now you can flirt bilingually - excellent. It's interesting to hear you say people are surprised when you say you're American. Lianne has been getting that from Spaniards too - only she finds they are intrusive in their questioning and don't believe her, etc. - in some ways asking, 'where are you really from.' Lots of confusion/ignorance of race, ethnicity and nationality - common around the globe unfortunately. You guys are the front of that wave. We are going to your house for dinner tonight - we'll miss you (and talk about you behind your back). Terry