My Passport now has a stamp starting with the letter Z

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So, when I last left you I was headed towards Zimbabwe and the mighty Victoria Falls...

Day 7 of our overland trip we woke up early and headed towards the border where both Mike and I got raped by the Zimbabwean government. Turns out their Military dictator doesn’t really like Canadians and we had to pay $75 for a single entry visa. (Please note the south Africans on our trip paid nothing, and the Germans paid $30).

So, if we actually wanted to see Victoria Falls from the Zambia side (which I kind of wanted to do) we would have had to pay $50 to get into Zambia, and then pay $75 to get back to Zim to catch our flight out. With a welcome like I am sure you can imagine how excited I was to enter Zimbabwe.

“The smoke that thunders”

We arrived at the park in the morning and when we got out of the truck you could feel the spray from the falls. Considered one of the three largest in the world (already been to Niagra and Iguazu in Argentina/Brazil) the Zambezi River comes forward from Zambia and just falls where there is a massive crack in the earth. Vic Falls is considered one of the natural Seven Wonders of the World – they form the largest falling sheet of water in the world.

We were checking out the statue of David Livingstone (Scottish explorer believed to be the first Euro to see the falls) and I saw a little blonde kid wearing a Lundquist shirt. Asked where they were from. Swedes! I had a full hockey talk about the Oilers, the new Swedes playing for the Oilers (Magnus and Omark), and about the world juniors. It was so funny; they wanted to know if I knew any of the scores yet. So exciting! Mike, who is not into hockey, thinks I am a hockey whore. He does not understand that for me Christmas is not about presents anymore… it is about the first game of the World Juniors tournament on Boxing Day. The lack of internet access was killing me!

In typical African fashion there are no real safety concerns. You can walk right up to the edge of the cliff and look down. No fence, no nothing. On the other side (Zambia) they let people walk along the edge of the falls, walking in water, and some people were even climbing down to hang out in pools along the edge of the cliff. (I so wanted to do that… so badly – stupid Zim visa).

We chilled for quite a while and then walked back through town to our hostel for a night in a real bed (well a dorm bed, but it is a step up from a tent). The town is set up for tourism and there are lots of tourist police walking about. Felt very safe and slightly entertained by all of the touts trying to sell us souvenirs in exchange for our clothes. (Economy in Zim not so good, so they were offering up trades for anything we had).

I was pissed off that we couldn’t go to Zambia without spending a lot of money, and I was irritated with Zimbabwe. Called South African Airlines to find out if we could switch our flight to the following day (giving us an extra day in Mozam) but it was going to cost $150 each. Nice… since the flights were $210 to begin with.

I was getting annoyed that everything in the town cost a forture to do, but I found in the Lonely planet we could go see a lion feeding for $5. After paying one American dollar to make the airline call I was totally miffed. The hostel didn’t know anything about the lion thing and Mike said – you are a hostel, I am going to make the call and you are not going to charge me. One quick taxi ride later and we were there. We got quite close to a male who did not like Mike – seriously, roared at him and wouldn’t take his eyes off him. Guessing his bright yellow shirt was annoying.

Mike got to hold a baby croc (no thank you for me), and then we then to got to see a bunch of massive crocks fight over a piece of elephant meat on a fishing line. Slightly mean to tease them, but freaking hilarious at the same time. Crocs used to be endangered in Zim but now they are fine so the place raises crocs to the age of 3 or 4 and uses them for the leather. The tail can be used for meat, but the rest of it isn’t very tasty. The croc leather goods were amzing and the colours they had them died was hilarious.

We stumbled upon a lovely family – British parents, who have been in Zim for 35 years. Dad is a doctor who started an HIV project back in 87, mom works at a school for deaf children, and a son who was born in Zim but now in university in the States. His American girlfriend Melissa was visiting for the first time. They offered a ride in their car back to town so we squished in and rode off to see the fancy Victoria Hotel which was built in 1903. You get a great view of the gorge and the bridge that was built between zim and Zambia, and just the spray coming up from the falls. Also saw the vintage train station next door that was very cool - the family was suprised you could take a photo because apparently there are strange no-taking photo rules in Zim and that used to be one of them.

The car ride was funny as Peter told us how his dad had blown by a police checkstop on the way there. You see – the car was given to them by the government in exchange for work done (instead of being paid in $). They were given no papers for the car and couldn’t get licence plates. Apparently they’ve had it for 2 years and no major problems – gotta love the sketchy Zim government.

Dinner that night was at Mama Africa serving up authentic dishes and entertainment of traditional dancing (who doesn't want a meal and the opportunity to watch half naked men dancing in animal pelt loin clothes). I even got up on stage when they started pulling up people. Let me tell you – I can keep up with the loin cloth men.

Tears in Zimbabwe

Next day we met our Zim family back in the gorge for some activities. As Mellissa and Peter were about to do a zip line I saw him give a little box to his mom to hold. Nosy as I am, I asked and yes, he was planning to propose at Vic Falls that day. I was so excited for them!

Mike decided to do the full package of the flying fox, the zipline and the gorge swing bungy. We could have done the zip line together but he made me do it myself. I am scared of heights, I don’t know why I do this shit, but when I got up on the platform and looked down to the Zambezi River below I totally panicked. I was crying my eyes out, trying to pull myself off the platform while two Zim guys hooked and harnessed me up. Mike – thought it would be good for me to go alone. Total dick. Melissa and Peter and about 20 other people (including small children) couldn’t pull themselves away from watching my torture. Finally, when the guy had me hanging off the edge of the platform – through my tears I managed to yell out “I F’ING HATE YOU MIKE WALKOSKI” before the Zim dude said ok bye bye and let me go.

Of course I was fine but it was scary as hell for me. I am a pansy. I don’t care. As we walked to the bridge (the official border of Zambia and Zimbabwe which we could go out on without having to pay anything) I was still shaking. Mike, again, was convinced it was good for me. He couldn’t understand how I did the lost city hike in Colombia, climbed Cotopaxi in Ecuador, and did the W in Patagonia and I was scared to a do a zip line.

Later in the day a South African woman came up to me and told me I was very brave for doing what I did. I looked over her shoulder to see her children standing there. I apologized for swearing so loudly while they were watching, and she said not a problem. She is scared of heights and there is no way she would have done what I did, all of her family is very proud of me. No sympathy from Mike - but nice to know there are sympathetic people out there cheering for me.

The afternoon was spent hiding from the rain and shopping at the market (a-maz-ing) before we ran into our adopted family again. Had to check she had the ring on and then gave her a big hug. It was so exciting, because it had just happened and the time change back home, Mike and I were the first people to wish them congrats, I felt like I had known them for so long. We were nervous that it was going to be raining on them at the falls, but Peter said everyone started to leave and he got a private moment to propose (as his parents looked on). Seriously… they are so cute.

We had to move hostels because of space and when we arrived at the new one it was a 14 bed dorm with mosquito nets in the open. I had a mental breakdown and refused to stay there - we've backpacked with the best of them but both of us decided we are too old for that shit – Mike went off in search of another place that had space. Um – in the dark, and large animals including elephants are known to walk the streets.

Place turned out to be much better – three bed dorm for the two of us, except Mike saw a huge flat spider and told the guy to get rid of it. He can do a bungee jump, but apparently he is scared of spiders. When we got back late that night he was convinced the guy hadn’t removed it so he did a full sweep of the room – moving the bunk beds and everything until he found another one and had to remove it using the garbage can– so dramatic. Then he made me move off the single bed to the bottom bunk because he was too tall... seriously high maintenance .

That night we went to a party at a hostel. Sean and I got there first, and there was a $3 cover charge and I refused to pay it on the premise that I have a vagina. I don’t pay cover at home; I am certainly not going to pay it at a dumpy hostel at Vic Falls (still bitter about the $75 visa for Canadians). Sean got to stand there while I had a conversation with the “door man” about my vagina and he finally let me in. Sean said “I knew you would get away with it, because you are such a stubborn cow!” Best compliment I heard all trip.

Our last morning we went back to the market to buy some last minute things (I am such a craft market whore) and then took a sketch car to the airport. (Our cabbie the night before said he could take us for less money in his own car) no problem, we got there ok, but I got stuck in the back seat of his shitbox on wheels with a random rod up my ass for the full 20km ride. Fun Times.

Most people from our overland trip were on the same flight so we got to say our goodbyes. Oh – except for Chloe, because she had a flight on the budget airline. But Mike and I both knew that flight left from Zambia, not Zim – but she certainly didn’t know that. Mike told her the night before, and after a few tears, he helped her get sorted out and she managed to get there (we think). He was with Chloe while Sean and I were at the party – he pulled the teacher move on her - he told her what she had to do and then made her paraphrase back everything she was going to do in the morning. So hilarious.

Gonna miss my fave buddy Sean, but hoping to see him in South Africa some time soon. Between helping me barf on the Okavanga flight, taking Adam and Eve naked pics with lily pads in the delta, and teaching me how to use my camera – he has a special place in my heart. I think Mike and I made his trip– and he definitely made our overland experience a lot more memorable.

So we said good-bye to Zimbabwe. It was expensive but ended up being a good time.

Up next… new years in Mozambique!

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Photos

our zim family.. the day before they got engaged
view from the victoria falls hotel - note the spray from the falls in the back right