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Published: April 5th 2008
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It has been a long time since we have last written. A very long time. Since our last blog entry, we postponed our return home (again!) by another month, in order to extend our stay here in Malawi. I could blame the reason we haven’t written in so long on the fact that the internet here in Malawi is very slow, or that the power goes out several times a week. Or that because we have actually been working we are often quite busy. But truthfully, I think the real reason that we haven’t written blog entry in such a long time is that we have settled into a routine, a real life of sorts… and for some reason it seems much easier, much more exciting to write about our travels and adventures, rather than real life.
It is like this: we wake up around 6am or 7am, and implement our little system for 4 people sharing one bathroom; we go to the refugee camp on certain days and stay at the office on others; evenings are usually spent with all 4 of us gathered in the kitchen, rehashing the days events over a sizzling pan of stir-fried veggies or
Ann’s delicious enchiladas, intermixed with regular movie nights, volleyball nights, and Malawian aerobics. We often close out our week at James’ Joint, our favorite neighborhood haunt, where you have to order your meal 4 hours in advance if you want to get it that night, and either spend the weekends away hiking/swimming at one Malawi’s many gorgeous locales, or in Lilongwe with great company, at costume-dancing-expat-filled extravaganzas.
Being surrounded by brilliant, compassionate, globally-concerned people has been one of the best aspects of our time in Malawi. The expat community here is truly its own little subculture- a tad like high school or summer camp, where everyone knows everyone, but without the drama. Everyone is so interesting and everyone is doing such interesting things. Some people are here for only a few months, like us, while others are here for a year, years, or even indefinitely. Even though the past few months have felt more like real life than previous parts of our trip, it is still just one period of our overall trip to Africa. For many foreigners in Malawi though, living and working abroad is their real life- not a vacation from it. It really opens your eyes
to how many different options there are in life. The past few months have certainly given us a snapshot of what abroad life would be like.
Admist living out our little Lilongwe routine, we have still managed to have our fair share of adventures. Some of the highlights and lowlights (you take your pick) of the past few months include the following:
-Nkhata Bay, an idyllic place on Lake Malawi, where we stayed in a bare-bones bamboo hut tucked into cliffs, and the water was absolutely perfect
-Dzalenyama Forest Lodge- required some major off-roading to get there, but made for a great weekend of hiking and swimming in waterfalls
-My first African funeral- one of the women in my women’s HIV therapy group rather suddenly passed away in February. It was really sad for everyone, but it was an amazing experience to go to her funeral. Prior to the actual funeral, everyone gathered at her home, just sitting on the floor, singing for hours. There were prayers, and a viewing, and then all 500 or so people walked to the refugee camp graveyard, where there are hundreds of big mounds of dirt with simple wooden crosses
bearing the names of the deceased. As one of the unofficial guests of honor, I often got shuffled around with the family, which felt both like an incredible honor and imposition at the same time. During the actual ceremony though, I was with the other women in my group, all of us standing quietly together, holding hands.
-BABY NYSSA- Do any of you remember how excited I was before we came after reading another volunteer’s blog about how she had a baby named after her? Well, it actually happened! One of the guy’s in Ann’s men’s group was having a baby. He really wanted to name the baby Ann, but unfortunately another man from the group had just had a baby, and beat him to it. So with the name Ann already taken, he decided on Nyssa! Second choice, but still 😊 Baby Nyssa was born February 19, only a week after my own birthday, and her family continues to be incredibly sweet. Whenever her dad sees me, he says, “Oh, my daughter!” I am truly delighted and honored.
-The Mulanje Adventure- Our well-planned, earnest attempt to spend the weekend climbing Malawi’s highest mountain became the typical African
adventure when: Ross got malaria for the second time in the past two months (the first time, both he and Ann were bed-ridden with malaria over my birthday) and our friend’s car broke down after hours of driving over bumpy, mountainous, dirt roads. Alas, while the rest of our gang made the brutal climb and Ross lay in our hotel room in delirium, I ran around trying to navigate car repair arrangements with the locals. Nevertheless, Mulanje had its’ highlights: skinny-dipping under the stars in waterfall pools, stumbling upon the porters’ party and joining them into the night, and watching the moon rise over Mt. Mulanje from our base-side chalet.
So between our real-life routine and our African adventures, time has passed us quickly, and suddenly we are facing saying goodbye… goodbye to the friends we have made from all over the world, and our dear friends from home, Ann and Jason, who welcomed us with open-arms into their Malawi home and life. And of course we must say good-bye to the refugees, the men and women who opened their hearts to us, shared their pain, taught us so much about the human spirit and capacity for human resiliency,
and entrusted us with their past and future. The women in my trauma therapy groups are constantly asking me to do whatever I can to help them when I get home, to tell the world about the plight of the African woman, about the hunger and isolation, and violence they face, to not forget about them. While I think most therapists feel some level of guilt when terminating with clients on their own accord, the responsibility I am feeling to pay homage to their testimonies is huge. I know I will not forget them. But how I will carry their stories on, how I will repay the trust they bestowed in me, I am not yet sure.
Until next time... from Road Trip South Africa 2008!
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