miss dmeanour

I've been in Cambodia too long when.... When Sophat has had every guesthouse TV tuned to karaoke, and I'm singing along as words appear on screen, AND understanding this crap (latin alphabet transliteration versions). When "Tea Money" is no longer an embarassing topic during negotiations. When a total absence of traffic law turns driving in Phnom Penh into an exciting competition. When local eating places next to public places of **** cease to horrify. When the Police are never even considered as a source for assitance. Neither are the Courts, the Army, the Gendarme, nor the provincial clinics or hospitals. When I can walk past the trays of fried tarantulas without jumping away and into oncoming traffic as the preferred method of death. When a visit with the rural 'Doctor' involves the reading of entrails, the ... read more

My bike needs a foghorn, a really loud one, because squeeky horns are used indiscriminately and become 'white noise'. Sophat insists on warning cows with a pathetic 'peep peep' as they step out on to the road, and is amazed when they arrogantly ignore him, forcing him to make a surprised avoidance manoeuver. Dogs attend, so do chickens, but for some reason ducks don't (a useful little observation I'm compelled to share). During our trip to Mondulkiri, Sophat's horn would sound at odd times and I set to thinking that he had resorted to warning trees to move out of the way. I couldn't see around his vast frame to realize that it was Jennifer's backpack, precariously balanced in front of him on the bike, that would topple and press on the horn button. We were ... read more

There are many loose ends dangling before me in Phnom Penh. Some of them I will get to in the two days left to me and others will have to be secured by others, or more likely, not at all. I had hoped this would be a day of rest after the dashing about yesterday visiting Lawyers and banks., trying to sell the dirt bike, printing photographs for medical record and criminal evidence on behalf of beaten Banlung woman. Already I miss our young drivers whose good humour helped us deal with the fatigue of the cross country trip. Hey, we paid them well and I've had photos printed for them to remember us by (as if they can ever forget)! Details of the Ratanakiri -Mondulkirir bike ride will take a while to sort and relate, ... read more

Sophat took me to his sisters bakery early this morning as usual. It was full of men sitting, drinking coffee, eating rice and watching one of three televisions, as usual. In one corner there's karaoke, or girls (often Thai)looking good but dancing badly while singing pop songs with helium inhaled voices. In the middle of the cafe it's boxing or a macho movie and perhaps a soppy love tragedy soap opera on the third. About twice a day, 15 minutes of pornography is offered to all and admittedly I would actually be embarrased to be present at this time, despite my curiosity to see what's popular. Apparently it's standing room only, with a look-out guy for the Police and makes for a smart business move to be recommended to the Stung Treng family cafe. I'm sure ... read more

It's early evening, mosquitos are swarming now that the sun has slipped below the horizon, and It will be dark soon. I'm poolside for the first time since I arrived, typing, drinking cold beer, wanting to get drunk and wishing tomorrow to be over already. Much of the day was spent in preparation for tomorrow's court appearance, beginning with the hand written police report naming the errant contractor and the sum of money to be repaid. To this was attached a copy of three bank transfer reciepts (two hours coaxing the 64 kbs connection to download three files, which then wouldn't print), and finally a few photos of the unfinished house! Apart from the last task to have the farm tennents ratify the land use agreement, I hope my work here in Banlung is done. So ... read more

Some of us march to the beat of our own drum. I don't follow well, nor do I stay in line unless compelled or threatened, and for more than a year now I've persevered in a form of dance quite unsuited to my temprament in that it requires me to follow, causing untold suffering to men who've attemted to lead where I've refused to go! Whatever talent I may have for dance is not best served by a partner. They're for 'Social Dancers' to enjoy. I'm too much of a loner, prefering to lose myself in the feeling of the movement itself rather than be consciously concerned that I'm missing the lead. Which I usually am! t's time to move on to something new, or dust off some neglected passion of the past. Back to ... read more

It hit hard and for an instant I felt very alone. This only happens when I'm by myself (now for example) and brought suddenly back to the present, realize I'm not at my desk in school still wondering what to do when I grow up, and that many years have passed. It's a fleeting shock, replaced by a sense of awe that I actually lived as I had dreamed to .......and now look where that got me! I'm alone in the middle of the least populated region of Cambodia. What the hell was I thinking! Having washed my camo cut offs, and asked the girls if they can wash my jeans while the sun is out, I'm wrapped in a towel from the waist down and am told I will have a male visitor arriving any ... read more

Where have all the dollars gone? (to the tune of the 60's protest song. BTW, that rhymed....in both languages....English and American!) I'm going to request that my sister, Sarah, dust off those Graphic Design skills and dash off a couple of story boards for me. High illiteracy rates mean that information is best comminicated through pictures. The fact that it's the US bank that owns everything we supposedly "have" is not a message easily believed by the people here, and I need a visual aid to help me explain! As I turn every corner, there's another hand begging for the small money that would pay for the Police and courts to do the job they should be doing anyway, to buy a sack of rice for an abandoned wife and her children, to pay the debts ... read more

There's something reminiscent of my boarding school days in this dilemma. I have on the table before me three freshly baked baguettes and only two small portions of butter. The choice as I see it is to either spread each bread so thinnly with butter and taste nothing, or slap the stuff on one piece and enjoy it? If this decision is to be my greatest challenge of the day, I'll be laughing! 5pm: Of course that wasn't to be the case. I waddled into Terres Rouges with clothing stiffened by the red dust and a hacking cough, took a shower fully dressed with the intent we would all come out a little cleaner than when we started, and now sit in the evening light trying to make sense of my day. A phone call in ... read more

Mating behaviours of the lesser spotted ...Khmer? No outward physical sign of intent is permitted to be directed towards the female, no matter how drunk a man/group of men become. Public hand holding is never seen outside of the main cities, and even then is rare. Crude conversation amongst groups of men in public is tolerated when drunk (the khmer male is usually drunk on a daily basis, any time of day in the countryside, but usually nightime). According to my surveys in provincial Cambodia,sex isn't asked for among the less sophisticated and happens quickly, and in the dark and not naked and never anything but missionary. It is an immediate need for relief and not a pleasure as we know it to be. They never kiss and considering the state of their mouth/teeth hygiene even ... read more