don´t know - now reality comes to me - met some friends and got nice sms from my loving mister right! ... now i feel that i will depart very sooooooooon! [View Full Entry]

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TOMORROW!!!! the word - no, the day I have ever dreamt of!! Within the next 26 ours I will leave my flat for a looooooooooong time to make my life in AFRICA. All of my visions have come true. Okay, not even all but most of them. It was so hard to find the way over there but now, it will be true!!! packed my things yesterday...in and out...had too much weight... had to throw out things but now, it seems to fit! for that little time I will only rest here, I am really calm today. But maybe the reason [View Full Entry]

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i am really excited!!!!!!!!! i am nervous...feeling strange...absolutely enjoyed...unstructured...troubled...anxious...sad...happy...allllllllllllllllll of this in one human beeing! is that possible? can you exist with such huge feelings in you??????? yes, you can. its difficult but it works!!! just preparing the last things. yesterday i had much trouble with my camera equipment and missing features. nothing seems to work but after 1,5 days work and trouble, i got it!!! yesssssssss ... need it! Have to make my room empty, put the things on the roof, pack the rest of my suitcase, clean th [View Full Entry]

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didn´t do much of that things i wanna do. but this is equal for me. i am feeling much more better then the last days!!!! yesssssssss...i am looking forward to my trip to guinea. i am excited!!! warm waves of joy are browsing through the whole body and make me feeling very happy. just missing my sweetheart - didn´t hear from him today because he is "on a mission" ... hope to hear tomorrow... our date won´t be realistic. what a shame!!!! but if it would be true love, we will hold this time and grow up in the meantime. maybe [View Full Entry]

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after laying the whole day on my canapé because i felt very sick, i got an energy flash in the evening. until 3.30 h am i put some things into my backpack and suitcase. tried, how much weight each other. what do i have to take, what can i leave here??? i am getting really really nervous. could only sleep for 5 hours althoug i took some herbs with valerian and some stuff like that to calm down and feel more comfortable. but all my muscles are under pressure so that i am not able to sleep comfortable. wow. what an [View Full Entry]

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i cannot believe that time passes so quick now...!!!!!! i feel excited but not in reality. my blood pressure goes up and down and makes me problems the last two days. too much pressure, too much of all... my personal doc told me to RELAX!!!! yes i will do. arrived yesterday at my home and enoy to be finally here!!!!! there are even many things to do but i feel not well these days. have migraine and lay down on my canapé. just walking to the pharmacy to get some medicaments against. oh my dear. all that quite before i will [View Full Entry]

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the real countdown started - only less than 9 days until departure. i have tons of things to organize and nothing works really today. i have had lots of phone calls but didn´t get the right persons or heard that they didn´t do anything until now!!!! I only have 9 days to finish all that!!! SHIT ... so. my lovely date seems to be invisible...one time, he is super sweet, sends my marvellous pictures of himself and then he doesn´t reply...until now, he didn´t say anything about "say good bye" or something like that. i hope already and try to believe [View Full Entry]

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i am in a great chaos of feelings. was very busy and reached most of my goals on this weekend. today i was a little bit layzy but i needed it very much. wrote with some supernice people via messenger and had a relaxing time just for me while watching "sex and the city". it was a girls´day!!! yeah. rather nice. i prepared my computer for the trip. that for itself needed many hours! i tried to clean up my room and to bring out most of my stuff to prepare for my rental. today i heard from mister right. he [View Full Entry]

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have much things to do at the moment. goals for the day: 1) having phone conf with the guys from guinea 2) renew my notebook and install all necessary programs 3) write a to-do-list with all important things i have also to do yesterday, i had a nice dinner with my roommate. we had finally time to speak to each other and i told her about my fears and my joy about the trip. had a very bad experience yesterday with a strange guy from conakry who writes to me since a few days and who believes, that he loves me [View Full Entry]

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hello all you around the world!!!! happy valentine!!! i never got some wishes on valentine´s day. but this year i got some!!!!!! nice, very nice. only mister right is silent. but i know the reasons...its okay...heheheh! i decided to look only forward and only positive. there are so much nice things in my live, no reason to be sad or depressive! you can change everything within seconds with a positive view and i will do - no I DO!!!!!! about 2 weeks and i am preparing for my flight!!!! unbelievable. wuaaaaaaaar. 2 weeks with work, waiting, love and saying good bye [View Full Entry]

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