The sweatiest man on earth

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It's now midday in Fort Kochi. And it's bloody hot. And more humid than it is hot. Forget moving - you've sweated your shirt through as soon as you've thought about moving. Evenings are almost unbearable. It's as much as I can do to lift the fork to my mouth.

Probably not going to get a lot of sympathy though, am I?

Anyway, arrived at Fort Cochin via a fantastic budget flight from Mumbai and then an hour and a half journey by cab. More exotic indian driving - one amazing manouver on the way. A triple overtaking. Slow lorry in the left lane, being overtaken by a fairly slow car in the middle of the road, with another one using his superior 35mph top speed to overtake practically in the gutter of the other side of the road. Oncoming traffic was an issue, but nothing fatal, which I think qualifies as an acceptable overtaking manouver.

Fort Kochi is very, very laid back. In two minds about it. Our hotel is amazing - this one is worth photos - will upload later. It's right on the sea, with a beautiful jetty where you can eat the amazing food in the evenings. Something else. One downside is no beer - I think Fi almost had a heart attack when she realised that was off the cards. Not big on beer in Kochi - you have to walk past the beach bars to find something... hissing touts tell you about the fresh seafood and the 'Chilll-ed beersssshhh'. Tried that last night on a beer quest. Bad move. Food looked awful, and the beer (served from a teapot into chipped mugs, so that no one can see it...) was... probably not beer at all. Bitter lucozade with a chemical hit. Shades of listerine, I think. Had a couple of sips, settled up and made it back to the hotel for keralan fish curry, tuna curry and eggplant, followed by coconut pancakes and banana fried in butter and honey.

Great excitement tonight. There's a procession at one of the temples, featuring elephants. Classic example of 'Indian time' though - seems fairly flexible. The travel guy at the hotel says 4pm, the rickshaw driver touting for business this morning says 11.30am, the tourist office says yesterday on the other side of the bay, or maybe tonight on another island, and the woman in the shop near the temple reckons 5.30. Best option is to take an average, and try to rememeber that the rickshaw fare is only about 25p so it doesn't really matter if we have a few attempts at catching it.

More excitement - my shirt was made. 500 rupees - six quid or thereabouts. I could get used to this. In fact, I'm so used to it already that there's another one on the way... Shirts are the way to go - I may as well bin the t-shirts. Too damn hot.

OK, another essay done. Not enough time to talk about the goats wandering the streets, or the way that even in maybe the most touristy town in this part of kerala me and Fi are still noticable enough to have the kids giggling and saying hello as we walk past. Or about the chinese fishing nets - beautiful, and I think lunch today is going to be fish chosen and bought by us straight off the stalls by the net, and then cooked at a cafe a few feet away. Food miles are minimal in Fort Kochi.

Still, no beer... Or at least, no beer that doesn't taste of lucozade and isn't served out of a teapot.

I haven't found my Indian paradise yet...

(Gaz - toilets are fine. And I'm a convert to the Indian way of wiping. But that's probably more info than anyone needed. No rabid dogs yet - loads of strays, but they can't be arsed to foam at the mouth. They just find a spot and crash out. Lots of sleeping dogs to let lie in India.)

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Photos

The 'sculpture garden'
Honestly, I could have stayed at this hotel for the full month and a half...

The 'sculpture garden'
Honestly, I could have stayed at this hotel for the full month and a half...

Comments

[Jamie]

Sounds great
So far so good. Food sounds great. Can't believe there's no beer but I'm sure your natural instinct for unearthing it will win through. Any chance of bringing back one of those shirts? Similar measurements to you, I would say (although without the moobs!) Say hello to Fi. Enjoy!

[Gaz]

I thought that said 'The Sweetest Man on Earth' at first class. That can't be right I thought... Your cats seem fine. Actually forgot to go over on Tuesday night, so went over on Weds instead, and all three bowls were still brimming with food, so I assume they're all ok. I'll have a check again tongiht. BTW your top lock is a bit fucked isn't it? it took me ages of fiddling before i realised that you have to turn the key to the left. Glad you're having a good one, in spite of the heat. It's still only 5 degrees or so back here, and the last few days it's pissed it down.