Fruit smuggling is not big and certainly not clever

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The journey from Mendoza to Santiago takes you through the Andes and is a journey which should be done during the day so you can take advantage of the amazing views. After my experiences of crossing borders, especially from Bolivia to Argentina I thought this would be a piece of cake. During my visit in Mendoza, I had bought a bag of sundried tomatoes, and when I bought them the assistant advised that I wouldn’t be able to take them into Chile. As usual, I knew best and tried to take them across the border, which makes for another story in my quest to offend customs officers in South America. On bus they give you an Affidavit that you have to sign. This declares that you are not taking any produce, meats etc from Argentina into Chile. At this point I still have coffee from Colombia in a rucksack, bottles of wine from Argentina in another bag and some cow skin rugs which Sarah bought in another bag. I didn’t expect that everything would be fine, except the tomatoes. I declared that I wasn’t carrying anything, and didn’t think anything else of the subject. If they found these tomatoes then I could just give them up and then that would be it.

When we arrived at the border, the snow is starting fall and I am wearing shorts and flip-flops. Some of the greatest forward planning ever, considering we are crossing through the Andes. Sarah and I get our exit stamp from Argentina, and then our entry stamp into Chile, so far so good I am thinking. After the stamp I think that we are just going to hop back on the bus and then set off. Oh no. The entire luggage on the bus gets taken off and x-rayed. The whole of the bus is lined up with the hand luggage on a table in front of them and the dogs walk along the table trying to detect drugs. The woman next to Sarah was asked if it was ok if one of the border agents could put a test tube with liquid in, a test for the dog, to see if it would pick up the scent. The dog walks up and down the table and starts sniff around this woman’s bag. Low and behold the four legged flea carrier finds the test tube. I have never seen that before, first time the dog was spot on. I have never thought of smuggling drugs but if the idea even crops into my mind then I will just remember that dog and the thought of doing 20 to life in a South American prison will push that thought right out of my mind. We watch our bags go through the x ray machine. The bag with the wine and the cow skins go through fine. My rucksack goes through fine as well. Sarah’s bag with my coffee in gets stopped, searched and is allowed to go through. My other bag goes through and gets stopped. They find the tomatoes. I tell them that they can take the tomatoes and leave that matter at that. Oh no. They ask my name, and find my Affidavit. Then they ask me to follow one of their agents into a room. This is when I started getting a feeling of déjà vous. The last time I did this I ended up in just my underwear at the Argentine border. At least this time I came prepared and had a small tin of Vaseline in my pocket. The agent sits me down and fills in four forms which detail that I was caught with 400grams of sun dried tomatoes which I hadn’t declared on my form. If I had ticked yes, everything would have been fine, but I had ticked no. Twenty minutes later I get transferred next door, where a guy asked me the same questions and then fills out a computer form. I claimed that I simply forgot I had the tomatoes. The excuse was that I had been travelling for 5 months and had stuff in my bag which I had forgotten about. I just hoped this was going to work, as at this point the Chilean authorities were taking my tomato smuggling very seriously. The agent needed to speak to his boss about where my fate was going to lie. He came back to advise that the punishment for tomato smuggling was $200. I had a Homer Simpson moment where I could just hear a scream from inside my head. I thought this guy was going to sting me for $200 for carrying tomatoes. Luckily he said he was going to let me off this time, to which I couldn’t conceal the smile on my face. The whole while, the rest of the passengers on the bus are waiting for me before they can leave. All in ,it put an extra 25 minutes on the journey, and the Argentine bus driver who was waiting for me outside the office had some choice words for the Chileans as we were walking back to the bus. I am sure he was muttering the same words about me when I was in the room. From the border it was another 3 hours to reach Santiago.

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Comments

[The Shref]

That would have made my day to hear of you being touched up for 200 dollars but even more if you had sampled a couple of chile's finest digits in that booty of yours hahahha

[Mark1981]

Nah Man
Thats harsh Shref. But Chocolate smooth lives to fight another day. The argies cant get me, neither can the chileans. Got 2 more weeks in south america to get touched up, lets see who does it. My money is on the bolivians after I call there president Evo Morales a thomas..