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Published: August 7th 2011
Some weird Brazilian mustard!!
We arrived at Heathrow with ample time to spare, which was lucky really because as we tried to check in we were informed that neither of us had an ESTA (which is basically a visa that is required by all countries before entering the United States) and without it we were not going to be let on our flight! Since when do Brits need a bloody visa to get into the US anyway?!...I contemplated giving the girl behind the desk some abuse about how i wished they had defaulted on their debt and so that when they had all come scrambling to us trying to escape their depression ridden country we could turn them away under the pretenses of not having an ESTA...but instead we rushed to an internet cafe to apply, and pay for the ESTA.
After dragging Hayley away from the duty free we finally got on the plane, to which Hayley exclaimed "this plane is shit!". I thought it was great because we had managed to wangle the 'medical seats' which meant there was waaaay more legroom for 'moi'... and no, I didn't even feel guilty about taking some poor disabled person's seat., they
Christ the Redeemer
always get preferential treatment...gingers need love too.
The change over at JFK was a bit of a mad dash due to the plane being delayed because there was no room to land at JFK which meant we only had an hour to get through passport control, get our bags of the carousel and check onto the other flight. We made it onto the second plane...to which Hayley exclaimed "this plane is even shitter! You don't even get your own TV!".
After a very long, ridonkulously cold and sleepless 10 hour flight we finally landed in Rio. As we walked through the airport we were hounded by 5 rather large ladies trying to sell us a cab. All of the daytime TV i had watched during uni kicked in and I immediately attempted to start a crazed bidding war between them to get the best price (Dickinson'srealdealLAD) but they weren't playing by the rules so i put the luggage trolley into 5th gear and burnt it passed them...stigLAD.
Got a taxi to the hostel called 'Walk on the Beach' in Copacabana. It was nice, staff were really friendly and spoke seriously good English. The best thing about the
hostel was the toilet...the had Bum Guns!!! (Those of you who have been to South East Asia will know exactly what i'm on about, and for those that don't...it is essentially a gun that shoots water up your arse instead of wiping with tissue paper...very refreshing after you've dropped the kids off at the pool).
Even though we were shattered after the plane journey we decided to go to the Christ Redeemer because it was Thursday and it would be less busy than on the weekend. Having waited for 30 mins for the bus and taken the 30min bus journey we arrived at the Christ (or Christopher to his mates) only to be told that we would have to wait for 2 hours before we could go up! So we treked all the way back to the hostel very unimpressed, and after a short game of Uno went to bed.
Got up early and headed back to Christopher, this time we got up there straight away via train. It was fucking impressive to be honest and the views were really cool. I kept taking panoramic shots of the views...it's my favorite thing about my camera.
Next, we headed back down the mountain and took the bus to Ipanema and went to Rodrigo de Freitas Lake. We rented bikes and rode around the whole thing in about an hour, stopping off half way to drink a cold coconut...was bloody lovely!!
After the lake we had plans to visit the Sugar Loaf mountain but the bloody bank had blocked our bloody cards!! Now, i'm not one to name names so i've used a false name 'twat-vest' to hide the banks identity. In order to get my card unblocked i had to buy a phone card to use on the pay phone to call 'Twat-vest', but i bought the wrong card so i had to buy another card which allowed me to get through to the bank but only gave me 6mins of calltime!! luckily I managed to sort it out before the time ran out, but it did mean we missed out on doing the sugar loaf mountain. 😞
In the evening we went to a street party in Lapa. It was awsome! We were drinking Caiprinha's all night, which is just pure liquor mixed with sugar and lime....very strong!! They had loads
of stalls in the street selling food and drinks and a live Samba band. We didn't dance though, we did the typical British thing and just shuffled our feet awkwardly.
Felt pretty shattered from the night before because of all the sugar in the Caiprinha's...felt distinctly like a vodka red-bull hangover (eurrrgh). After getting reading at a leisurely pace we headed to the Sugar Loaf mountain. The sun was out and the views of Rio were incredible! I took some...you guessed it...panoramic shots of the city and then we headed back down to a little beach at the base of the mountain.
On the beach we bought some weird Brazilian biscuits off a beach vendor. The locals seemed to love them but to be honest we thought they tasted like ass.
Headed back into Copacabana and got Hayley's debit card unblocked, we learnt our lesson from before and managed to sort it out with much less hassle!!
We finished the day off by chilling out on Copacabana beach watching the locals play football-volleyball. It's crazy how much control they have over the ball...mad jedi skills.!!
This evening i cooked Tuna Mayo
Of course I cooked a tuna mayo...made it with spaghetti hoops pasta...was a TASTE SENSATION!!
was a Taste Sensation!! We are not sure what we are doing but will let you know!...
ciao for now.
P.s. In a bit to repel the mosquitos I have covered, nay, drenched myself in 100% deet repellant. It burns when you put it on and is so strong that it melts plastic!! Whilst i have been writing this blog Hayley came and sat next to me and unwittingly bit my arm, it's been 30mins now and she still hasn't got the taste out of her mouth!!
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