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Published: November 13th 2008
and so it begins...
I enjoy beer festivals, events or any event where the soul purpose is to get wasted on an assortment of beers. I guess you could say a bar is the same thing, but bars are often filled with lonely souls, kids that shouldn’t be there and predators of both the male and female variety and very rarely are you treated to a deal or a heavy pour. A beer festival is the best event possible, because the people putting it on share the same goal as the people drinking. They just want to get us as drunk as possible and we want to be as drunk as possible.
I started the day with a mission statement, “12 beers, 3 hours, get disgustingly drunk. I attempted to keep track of how many beers and what brand I drank, but by the time I had gotten to drinking a beer made from bananas my itouch notepad made little sense and the built in spell check almost melted down like Lingwo from the Simpsons. Like all attempts to track your alcohol consumption or thoughts on mushrooms, it came to a very short end. The last thing I wrote in it
I go all the way to Ireland, to drink a San Francisco beer.
said, “who doo doos on the walls?” I can only imagine that someone had wiped crap on the walls of the bathroom.
We spent the few hours we had there slugging down beers after beers. It was like they were going to run out and we had to drink them before such an awful event came to fruition. We invented a chip tossing cup game, much like the game Hippy Stick, we play in Seth and Cameron’s backyard in Chico. It gathered quite the crowd and proved once again that team Roaring Donkey knows how to have the best time. My only complaint is that you can’t have an Irish beer festival indoors and only have 3 urinals and one toilet, it just doesn’t work. Towards the end they also wouldn’t let people who went out to smoke and were really drunk, back in. I never understood the concept of making a person drunk and then putting them into public, leaving them angry, feeling scorned and for society to deal with. They should have a happy water and pizza room with movies where you can chill out for an hour or two and score some Tylenol or vicodin for
Hmmmm Duff beer. Hmmm boobies.
us former pill addicts, while your friends finish drinking.
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