Why did I do this

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Christchurch was amazing... I'm now sat in the airport waiting to go back to Auckland, this is the lowest I have felt.
I got there on Friday and waited in the airport to be picked up spent the time reading, terrified at what was happening.
The person I was speaking to before came and picked me up as soon as they did I was calmer.
We talked the whole way back about everything just getting to know each other. I dropped my stuff off at theirs and we then went and got fish and chips. Which were so good. We came back and ate them and I went for a shower and we watched some tv complete luxury for me. We then ending up kissing and stuff it was amazing and cuddles lots of cuddles love that.
They then suggested we go and get chocolate.... I was so happy! That is my kind of person! We went out and got that and went out for a drive where they showed me the beaches of Christchurch and went for a walk along there.
That night was amazing to just sleep and cuddle all night. We stayed in bed until 11:39 the next morning. We went to this classic car auction in the morning then we then went out and went to the beaches for a look around, we did this 2 hour beach walk at the top had all the WW2 artillery machines we talked constantly I felt a connection we then went and got pizza and went and ate it by the bay. They then introduced me to their friends who they dropped off for a works meal and we headed back to their place, their flat mate was there and spent a while talking to them before we spent a few hours just cuddling again so much cuddling!
We then went out on the night with some of their friends, we went to christmas in the park which was a concert and fireworks which was so good and the fireworks was one of the best displays I've ever seen, we picked up alcohol and ice cream and went up to the top of port hills and saw the lights. We then went back to their friends drank for the night listened to music and stopped over their where we stayed in a spare room. I have hickeys everywhere it's disgusting... I have to meet my aunt in Australia tomorrow that won't look good.
We stayed in bed until 11:00 in the morning again and then went back showered changed and met these friends and went to Wendy's the fast food place and looked in this pet shop.
We then had to get back as my flight was due so I packed we cuddled. I am so sad to leave its screwed my head I could have stayed their forever. Christchurch my first impression was nothing there, depressing but we stayed in the inner city last time now when you have a car you can truly appreciate how beautiful Christchurch is. The lights at night were amazing it's such a big place. As weird as it sounds after such a short time I have fallen, on the verge of the L word.
We drove up to the airport and I was so sad I don't even want to to travel on I want to stay with them and it feels like a break up.
I hope one day we will meet again or even live in the same place instead of opposite sides of the world this sucks!
I don't even know how to deal with this, this has been the hardest goodbye so far I never want to go through this feeling again.

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