Rambling

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Kia Ora,

You know what's weird about NZ? No native mammals or any poisonous beasts in the wild. I've just had a nice long solitary walk in a eucalyptus forest (minus the koalas) and am sitting in Kerikeri's super happenin' Internet cafe -- McDonalds.
Let's talk about McDonald's differences, because everyone likes it. The menu here is different from America. (Sorry, no Le Royales.)Everything comes in the form of a sub sandwich with all the naughty fillings inside. Vege, Italian, Beef 'n' BBQ, or, if the customer's really feeling wild, Chicken Tandoori. What happened to the burgers??? I suspect guess the sandwich bread are really just elongated burger buns. The kitchen is totally laid back. No one wears uniforms or latex gloves.
Before coming to civilization, I had a beautiful week running around the Kauri Forest with Isi the German, Alyosha, the Australian psychiatrist and James the American with a VERY loud voice. They were a fun bunch, but the highlight for me, sicko that I am, were the trees. Kauris are absolutely amazing, miraculous, awe-inspiring, etc. If you want to spend hours being a slack jawed yokel*, you ought to see these hunks of wood. They're enormous, ancient pine trees found only in NZ, ranking alongside the California redwoods in size. The biggest one boasts the title of "Tane Mahuta," or God of the Forest, and God-looking it is. He is 2,000 years old. A vast wall of bark six meters wide rises nearly 18m to the lowest branches. Over 30 species of epiphytes (sorta like parasitic species) or plants and animals are festooned in its branches. Its gargantuan trunk barely tapered from roots to crown. Aaooooohhhm. I stared and stared, up and up. I couldn't hug him, so I bowed to him. Wicked, wicked me!
Unfortunately, the Kauri produces beautiful rich wood, which only hastened its demise, dominating the New Zealand economy in the nineteenth century. Needless to say, they're an endangered species.
Back to the human activity, the four of us ended up camping in a run-down cabin the forest, eating pasta and cheese and carrots three nights in a row. We were smack in the middle of Kiwi territory and James came bursting in after sundown saying "Kiwi! Outside!" Ooh, I got excited. We went outside quietly, shining the flashlight around, and...it turned out to me a couple of amorous rabbits. Damn. I'm coming to believe that the Kiwi isn't endangered -- rather, it doesn't, and never has, existed.
Now we've parted ways and I'm "working" at the Farm Hostel until I leave NZ. It's close to paradise. Claes, the Swedish work un-Nazi, is so easygoing that all I do is maybe an hour of work a day.
"Oh, I don't like to push people too hard," he says. "Do you want to go for a bike ride this morning?"
Sweet. All I've done here is suck cobwebs down from the eaves of the house with the vaccuum cleaner. That was a deep thought work in progress. Did the spiders feel pain as they shot down the hose into a bag to perish in a sea of lint, hair and funk? Do they scream inside when we wash them down the shower drain? Oh well, it's just one of the unpleasantries of life to which I shut my eyes and pretend I don't know what I'm doing to the poor creatures.
Two thousand citrus trees make up the property and I went out with a knit sack to pick some this morning. If only you guys could taste these oranges and tangelos. They're out of this world, so sweet and juicy....drool.
Oh, and vaccuuming the floor. It's mostly dog hair all over. I'm convinced that Rocky, Wee-Wee and Maya found a dead possum yesterday and rolled all over in the dead creature's death and decay. They smelled horrible!!!
So that's it for my work here. Pretty legend, eh?
I always forget to share the amusing peculiarities of Kiwi Kulture, but not this time. Drumroll please.
-- They don't call them "zucchinis, cucumbers or peppers." Instead, they're "courgettes, gherkins and capsicums," respectively What the hell?
-- I can't get used to the metric system. In fact, I hate it. Meters, liters, kilos, kilojoules, centigrade. What the heck does 20 degrees mean? Aarg!!! WHY can't I wrap my brain around it all?
-- The clothes in the shop windows are totally ugly.
-- Men don't hold the door open for the women, and vice versa.
-- Kiwi handshakes are firm and honest.

All for now, gotta go! The McComputer ticks away...

Diana

*Amusing phrase borrowed from the Simpsons. Wish I could take credit. Ha!

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Comments

[anonymous]

Hey Diana!
So I guess when you've been on the road as long as you have that "unsanitary" translates to "laid back" :) I think McDonald's is risky enough without the latex! Anyway, as always I love reading about your journeys. It makes for a nice escape. I'm expecting a book to come out of this you know. These blogs are like the trailers at the movies, I WANT MORE :) Keep having fun and be safe! ~AJ - AJ