So you just stand up, right?

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Torquay. Well, it isn't exactly a prime holiday destination anymore. Stuck on the arse end of the UK, filled with coach tours, blue rinse and decidedly dodgy food we have always avioded it like the plauge.

Thankfully when we stepped off the bus, Torquay was almost 12,000 km away and there wasn't a cream tea in sight (Much to nic's disgust). This Torquay is the home of surfing on Victoria's aptly named 'surf coast'. Filled with empty surf shops, closed cafes and a decidedly eerie backpackers (so quiet we ended up checking people in). It is unfortunately off season for surfing as the water is a little bit chilly and the Aussies are clearly wooses. We on the other hand lapped it up and made a be line for the water. After all the castle building we felt the time was right to venture further out into the shark-infested, rip-current filled nightmare with 'Kev' the resident surf coach.

A man who loved the sea Kev was in no doubt that he could get us up and surfing in under 2 hours. A bold claim, but one that for Nic at least was to come true quicker than was to be expected. With her Panda-like reflexes and the balance of decidedly wobbly table she had not expected to achieve much. In fact she was so shocked than when she did finally manage to stand on a board a brief yelp of delight was followed by an even more spectacular leap from the board. She hadn't fallen off she was just so delighted to be standing she completed an acrobatic star-jump into the sea, letting the board continue to surf for her. This was not the last time she was to achieve this feat, however, and with each successive standing display the leaps became even more excited and adventurous. All the way until she got so excited she just stayed on the board and surfed all the way to the beach - magnificent.

I on the other hand have balance, poise and grace. I float like a butterfly, delicate yet deliberate with every step. I can close my eyes without falling over and walk in a straight line, yet put me on a board and I surf like a cow - badly. I slipped and fell, overbalanced and fell, slid-off and fell, I tasted more sea water that day than in a lifetime previously. I even somehow managed to flip the board over and crack the fuins into my head - about the only thing Kev was impressed with that day. But low and beyond, long after my patience had gone and with Kev at odds to explain the obvious lack of any natural ability I stood. For a whole 3.4 seconds the ocean was my play thing and I was its master. Gliding across the surf I mocked bystanders and drifted gracefully, if decidely left, to the sandy shores. Knackered, but very, very relieved.

Our surfing oddessy over we returned to Melbourne and prepared to leave Australia behind. Another country, so little time. What can we say about OZ that hasn't been said before.

1) It's too damn easy - Stuff works, buses leave on time and people are polite and helpful, it's just not the traveller way

2) Chocolate's expensive - no really expensive, like 150p expensive for a Boost. With our habits that's some big spending

3) Not all creatures want you dead - Honestly, it's true. Some just want to be loved (and fed).

4) Anything listed as 'Historic' will be disappointing - If you want old, try Europe.

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Photos

Modern Melbourne
It's much nicer than Sydney