Advertisement
Published: October 31st 2010
Edit Blog Post
Flying over cities in the states you can always count on seeing swimming pools, baseball diamonds and high school football stadiums. It’s funny here because flying into Sydney all you can see is oceans, sailboats, cricket and rugby fields. It’s the strange little things that bring simple pleasure and reminders that you aren’t home anymore.
Sydney is a well put together puzzle. There are a million people and streets and backstreets and alleyways and stairs, but its so easy to navigate everything. The city has a pulse, there’s beeping horns and fast cars, people passing by quickly in a mad pace, but there’s also an alarming amount of calm, ease and friendliness about it. The décor and backdrop to the city is history, tourism and business. All I can think about is all the cool spy novels and movies that could be made here and I’m not sure why more haven’t. There’s just so much to look at and see, you feel your head begin to spin and then someone walks by you and says, G’day or hello and it stops.
That was the beginning of Sydney, it only took one hour to get punched. Yeah, I’m not kidding
you, I got socked in less than an hour!
Day 1
Tara and I got out of our cab, which took forever to get to the hotel because of mid morning and airport traffic. We check into our apartment/hotel which was pretty sweet, dropped our luggage and headed out for a 7am stroll through Sydney. Starving from the plane we attempted to find lunch, but all that was open was breakfast. I got my first inkling that things weren’t cheap in Sydney because a sign read, “Guinness Pints just $6.50!!!” Not a good sign for my wallet. We headed over to the Sydney Harbor Bridge and started exploring. We hadn’t realized it yet but on the way there we kept seeing all these historical points of interests, cool shops and photo ops, taking advantage of every one of them along the way. Later we discovered that our hotel was smack dab in the middle of a historical area.
You Hit Like A Bitch
We’re walking along the Sydney Harbor Bridge and we notice that we may be walking on the wrong side of traffic, though all the Asain people are also walking on the right side of
the path. We decide to kind of straddle the left side and the middle of the giant walkway across the bridge. We notice this 6’6” sweaty Australian guy jogging, but mostly sweating and flailing. I remember thinking he looked like he was about to vomit. All of a sudden he runs into me, or at least I think he runs into me. I go over the incident again in my head and realize the dude had just punched me, Tara turns around to see if he’s ok and he’s running backwards shaking his finger, “no, no.” Confusion abounds. I look down at my shirt and there’s two small blood stains. He did clock me and he split his knuckles open!!! I’ve been in Sydney for less than an hour and I already got punched. The funny part is that I had been making jokes about getting punched in the face here drunk one night. I’m half way there!!! Where the fuck are we that people just clock you at 8am jogging? There was a slight panic that I had gotten stabbed with a needle or something so I took off my shirt to reveal a red swell where I got
hit, I would also like to point out that I didn’t bruise and I don’t hate my life so much that I need to punch strangers on a bridge because I don’t have enough room to flop my arms around like a drag queen on fire, so I’m going to call this one a win for U.S.A. and team Roaring Donkeys. USA USA USA!!!
Tara and I stopped by a local bar for a quick beer and bite to eat. The bars, though ridiculously expensive, seriously, they are fucking grossly expensive. You aren’t supposed to tip here because the tip and service fee and taxes are already included in the drink and food, so everything service related is priced to sell in 2014. Beers and cocktails are half the size and twice the price. I haven’t been able to figure out the size lingo either, but a pint isn’t a pint it’s a schooner or something. We settled in at the bar and the bartender explained the tricks of the trade to us. We tried our hand at Keno and came up real short. Every bar here has some form of gambling to it, whether it’s horse racing, keno
or slots. It may be the booze talking, but I’ve already felt like I’ve adjusted to time change. We ended up eating calamari a quarter inch thick and delicious as hell while drinking 7 different beers on a rooftop overlooking the bay. Despsite the Knuckle Jogger, people here are fun and nice.
A lot of Station House regulars and family all treated Tara and I to dinner in Sydney so we decided to lump a lot of that cash together and go big. I didn’t realize how big tara had in mind but we took a picture of the bill and it should be in the pics below. We went to the number one rate restaurant in Australia called, “the Quay.” We started with gin martinis and a bottle of Madhatter Cab Shiraz. When I saw the menu, I got confused, first by the prices, secondly because I had no fucking clue what anything was. I decided to say, “fuck it,” and just started ordering the things I knew the least about. Let me say this, I have never eaten food so good in my life, I almost cried like a little baby after each different selection came it
was so good. I squeezed table cloths and stabbed at the table with silverware things were so good. I ate like a god, and felt like one. The restaurant was chocked full of waiters who all looked and dressed like James Bond villains. It’s one of those places where the put your napkins on your laps and there is someone to do everything but chew for you, but I’m sure if I had asked, they would have done it. They had a person for drinks, one for water, one for bread, one for ordering, one for food, one for delivery, one to check in on you, and someone for silverware and bussing. 9 million people for just our table. All this occurred while staring out the window at the Sydney Opera house. It’s by far the most romantic and expensive date I’ve been on, since we killed that hooker in Vegas. We polished the night off with a finely wrapped Cuban cigar, it’s funny that Tara’s first cigar was a Cuban. It took her about 6 minutes to light and I still had to help. We made friends with the people next to us and Peter told me he was
proposing on the outside balcony to his girlfriend. We sat and watched the whole thing go down like a couple of wedding creepers while we puffed away on our stogie. Love is in the air.
THe Menu of the Gods
Sea Pearls
Sashimi tuna, sea scallop with shave octopus, crab, smoked eel,
Raw Chinese artichokes, Hiramasa kingfish,
smoked eel, horseradish, nasturtiums, octopus, pickled kohlrabi, egg white & radish flower
Western Australian fresh water marron,
jamon and oloroso juices, young peas and broad beans,
young garlic cream, almonds, pea flowers, rose and vanilla salt
Butter poached coturnix quail breast,
chestnuts, truffle, bitter chocolate black pudding, milk skin, walnuts
Milk fed Suffolk lamb leg poached in salted butter,
slow cooked crisp lamb belly, Pantelleria capers, nasturtiums, purslane, artichoke emulsion, bergamot jam
Roasted wild snapper, smoked butter, celeriac cream
radish pods, hairy melon, kabu turnips, leeks, vongole juices
Eight texture chocolate cake featuring Amedei Chocolate
Preserved wild cherry compote,
coconut cream, chuao chocolate crumble, milk meringue crystals,
cherry juice and chocolate sorbet
Advertisement
Tot: 0.271s; Tpl: 0.017s; cc: 11; qc: 50; dbt: 0.0707s; 1; m:domysql w:travelblog (10.17.0.13); sld: 1;
; mem: 1.1mb
Colin
non-member comment
This made me smile