The Graduate Student Chronicles (Issue 1): It's November?!?

---

Yes, it is November and I have successfully survived two and a half months of graduate school. Whew! It has not been an easy feat though! Well let me start from the beginning: I got my acceptance during a somewhat special week in March. It was a notification via email, but my big fat acceptance letter came in the mail a week or so later. An awesome change to the thin, generic rejection letters I had been receiving. At the time, there was so much other stuff going on that graduate school seemed so far away.

Well if you read my last couple blogs, you know that I left Alaska and wound up in Lansing, Michigan. My first few days of graduate school consisted of me wandering around aimlessly with a campus map wondering how I was ever going to figure out the little trails. I still have gotten lost on campus up on the East Circle and the numerous sidewalks still confuse me up there. The south is a little more spread out and one main road tells you where you're going. No worries! I will figure it out one day.

Well I've been asked a lot about what graduate school is really like and this is what this little blog entry is going to tell you. I labeled it "The Graduate Student Chronicle" because technically I am not traveling, but I am in a whole new world learning how to live. So in this issue, my first issue straight from East Lansing, Michigan, the home of the MSU Spartans, we have the basic coverage of the last couple of months.

Our first story: The Cohort. This is the group you matriculated in with. They are going through the same thing as you: they have crinkled campus maps shoved in their backpacks for the first two months, they feel like little fish in a big pond, they may be taking a class with you since most first years are directed to the same basic starting schedule, they are learning little things about their advisors, excited to have their own "office," have a million keys on their keyring which they have yet to figure out which goes to which door at whatever building, and like you...they wonder what they are doing here. About a month after the 2010 cohort at MSU came in, a few of us were sitting around and all came to the same conclusion during our first day of graduate classes...I know absolutely nothing!

And we were all reminded of the Grey's Anatomy quote (with a little bit of rewording to make it more fitting): You're first years, grunts, nobodies, bottom of the graduate school food chain...Yes, that about sums it up. We're considered more professional than undergrads (even though most of them are the same age as us), but we don't have the intelligence to know what we're in for (aka many late nights), what a drag Lansing kind of is (because it's still all new and sparkly to us), and the flaws with our advisors (what...how they can flawed. They're brilliant)! But these lessons we are all quickly learning!

Story #2: Beware of the A.O.! Well...there are just so many things that could be said about overly-anal people. My recent confrontation has persuaded me to find my own space, own routine, and own place next fall. Yes, if you have even the smallest hint that one is coming your way. RUN! Run far away from the Anal Ones.

Story #3: When you are lost in your classes or where to start your proposal writing, resort to PhD Comics for a nice little pick me up. This website has comics that are not only geeky and hilarious to scientists, but pretty equivalent to what grad school really is like. I have a few lining the walls of my cubicle including one that shows the weekly fluctuations in grad student productivity. Only with me, one of my high/low points is the meeting with the advisor on Friday afternoons.

Story #4: The Friday afternoon meeting with the advisor. Kim and I meet on Fridays right before my stats class and it's both good and bad. If our meeting goes well (which most do right now...probably because of reasons highlighted in story #1) then the weekend starts awesome and I have a beer and relax Friday night and get excited to work the entire weekend. If they go bad...well...usually a beer is still had but much more down time in bed wondering where to go from here is had and my weekend is much less productive. Therefore, pick the right day for meetings with your advisor so you can still be productive. Either that or get some awesome friends (and I've been pretty lucky in this regard) that support you and remind you that you're here for a reason even if the advisor seems a little disappointed at the moment.

Story #5: Take the time to enjoy little side ventures. For instance, I was having a pretty busy week but one night after teaching, a couple grads and I attend the Wine & Stein at the Potter Park Zoo. Probably not the best idea letting young scientific intellects lose at the zoo with alcohol in tow, but we had a lot of fun! We wandered around trying good drinks and good finger food before going to see the various animals and remarking on the things we know about them. How cool the kangaroo is that it sits on its tail but it can pull its feet up and knock you down like a boxer. The way the big horned sheep stand on the tiniest of ledges, how porcupines are a little intimidating, how baby pigs make quite a bit of noise but are very cute, how goats will eat anything including your paper drink tag if you get too close (yes...one ate my tag as I pet his head), and just how cool the big cats are! It was a lot of fun and now the Potter Park Zoo is free for the winter months. Hope I can find the time to go!!

Story #6: It's all about the title!! As our Professional Development professor (Kay) has taught us, this will make or break you in a proposal, an article, or a paper. So figure out a good one, but make sure it's not too descriptive. As Kay pointed out, she was going to study the relationship dynamics of hyenas and after it was funded, a newspaper article showed up saying how the government was paying $45,000 just to study the love triangles among hyenas and what a waste it was. So her advice, pick a good title and don't include the study species name (just the general category like 'vertebrate') in your title. That way if bigwig political campaignists write up articles on government funding, they have to dig much deeper to figure out what your project is on.

Story #7: Stats cow man is fun but...perhaps not so informative! Statistics is a difficult language and picking a good teacher is a gamble. So while a man who lectures with cow examples is entertaining, some times...it just doesn't get the point across or highlight which techniques you should use on your own research animal.

Story #8: Proposaling has become an adjective to describe the hectic weeks and deadlines coming up for graduate students. I know I've been doing quite a bit of "proposaling" lately. You can also tell when your cohort has been partaking in "proposaling" given that half of my Prof D class has looked extremely tired, bug-shot eyes from reading so many science articles, some of them are even clutching their coffee cups given that it's all they've 'eaten' in the past 24 hours (okay, maybe that last one is just me), and many have the deadlines written on their notebooks, on calendars in their office, and programmed into their phone constantly reminding them of what lies ahead. Nevertheless, proposaling has been quite the task this past month and with the EPA one turned in just 2 days ago, I only have one more big one then some decisions to make about the other few I want to apply for. We'll see how it goes.

Story #9: The Service section of the CV can include just about anything. Well a lot of us attended the Thrill the World event the weekend before Halloween which was such a blast. After a few practice sections learning the stops and repeating the choreographed words in our head to MJ's Thriller, we dawned some zombie gear, took a break from our proposaling, and danced at the event. IT WAS AWESOME! Then we scared some people by going to a couple different bars with our zombie get ups on. And at the end of the night we all agreed, this is definitely going under our 'service' section given that we donated food to the food bank at the event! SEE OUR THRILLER DANCE AT:

Story #10: Developing the committee. Well a first year's biggest task besides trying to get funding and coming up with their dissertation research is to develop their committee. You have a HUGE selection and must narrow it down to 3 and your advisor with 1 outside of your department. And you have to match people's interests with yours without being too close-minded but also not being too broad. Well my attempts have worked out pretty well besides one ridiculous meeting that I hope never happens again And as of now, I have: my advisor (Kim), 1 confirmed member (Jenny the stickleback lady), 1 possibility (Gary who is currently on sabbatical but has been a big key in many of the sturgeon student's committees), and 1 uncertainty (I need a modeler but my attempts to find the right one have not yet worked). It is a task I'm still working on...

Story #11: Teaching the undergrads. hehe. Well I've had a blast teaching. I love how different my two groups are from one another. Tuesday wants very little help, Thursday constantly wants help, and my labs have some of the highest scores because I'm not that harsh of a grader and usually give them the benefit of the doubt. They keep me on my toes asking every possible question they can (including even personal ones like Kari, do you have facebook?). Yes, beware of the charmers! I'm smart enough to know when a good looking student is just trying to get their grade enhanced and it's kind of flattering but you got to keep your ground, pretend it's annoying, make fun of them, and put them in their place. That way, you maintain control of the classroom! And if there's one thing to learn it's you have to walk into the classroom like you own the place, you run it, you control what time they leave, but you don't treat them like little kids. Most of them are just about my age and I don't know more, I just have a little more experience. But this semester as a TA has definitely re-iterated my hopes to be a professor! I really love it even if it completely wears me out! 😊

And our 12th and final story of this issue: Modeling. If you include a way to model your study and apply your research to other systems, you are a much more attractive student to funding, your skills, and your future job perspectives. So, I am going to join BEACON: the Evolution in Action program here at MSU. It's going be awesome and I'll have my first class next semester which brings together evolutionary biologists and computer scientists for one common goal: modeling research! I'm going BEACON!

Well that concludes my article. Yes, I am a graduate student and I have no idea how I got here, but I'm excited to see where it all leads!

---