RIHLA #23

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Dear RIHLA,
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At first, my belief was revenge. Every time someone did something to me, I would get back at them. This made all the boys fear me.I grew up with an older brother and older sister, making me the one to be influenced the most. I became immune to my brother’s punches and harsh ways; I grew attached to them. I soon found myself looking a lot like my brother. Not that I blame him, he had it hard when he was small. I really hate restating the things that happened to him when he was eight years old. He was scarred for life after that moment.

Usually when something horrible happens to someone, they feel like a prey, very weak. This was how my brother felt; this is also why he would hurt others including himself: made him feel stronger. Of course, none of us realized what had happened to him the he did terrible things to those in the family. The problem did not come out until the summer of 2011 when my cousin told her parents of what my brother and her did when he stayed over my uncles house after running away, probably for the tenth time. The night still haunts me when my parents argued with my aunt, uncle, and their three daughters. I became filled with confusing and anger that I ran out of the house cursing at my uncle and my cousin. That night was when I finally broke into pieces. After that day, I never smiled. I could not even talk, I was split into two pieces that I knew were wrong: hating my bother or hating my cousin. It was very confusing. I cannot describe the feelings. It was after this incident that brother began to take actions. He had written a note to my aunt and uncle, he went to confess to a priest, and he began to change his ways.

It is very difficult to change a habit once you have done it for a very long time, but people manage. That is why I believe in forgiveness. My uncle did everything to humiliate my brother and my family. My aunt even wrote a long email and sent it to all of my other family relatives just to see what a “Monster” my brother was. I could not believe the things my brother and my uncle were putting us through, but I understood. I would have killed the man, just like my uncle had told my dad that night. That is why I changed my way from revenge to forgiveness, because revenge will not make you any better than the other person who did wrong. Despite everything, from not being able to see my cousins, not being invited to my family relatives’ parties, and hanging out at the park, I still long to see my cousin, aunt, and uncle.



Maritza Alvarez

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