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Published: June 19th 2019
Friday June 7:
We’re on our way! EL and HM arrive at O’Hare via Uber. Helens first Uber was smooth! Although nervous about their luggage weight ( I know insert weight jokes here) they were pleasantly surprised that they squeaked by the 40 lb limit set by Spirit Air. They actually encountered the ONE nice Sprit employee. A lunch followed and the wait begins for the Schmitty gals and ND! Once reunited the cattle call to steerage begins. Strapped into their cardboard seats they are about to embark on one of the bumpiest air flights ever! As the kids say it was Bumpy AF!!! Finally off the death bucket it’s car rental time! Our consumer savvy girls get their “Costco” cars and off they go! Time to hit everyone’s favorite Florida hotspot.... Sam Club! Our hangry crew get booze , water , half n half ( not enough) and snacks. Ok FINALLY GET TO CONDO!!! unpack quickly, head to dinner. In a revelation to NO ONE Friday night at Indian Shores restaurants are CROWDED! Finally find a new BBQ place close by AND they have sassy sauce for our very own sassy pants ND! It really was good and
with everyone fed it’s time for WinnDixie! ( I swear we do more than shop and eat ohhhhh wait nope nope we don’t!) Night night ohhhhh wait HM and EL head BACK to airport to get our last group member AB! HM is a great driver and we find AB! Back to condo, chit chat on front deck hit the hay around 1:00 AM!! As we drift off to sleep we dream of the hot sun and sand and sunny Florida weather!
KEEP DREAMING!!! Ain’t no damn sun here! EL is up first not letting a howling wind and rain hold her back. EL, MS and HS head to the flea market. Guess what??? It’s HOT HOT HOT there! Fighting dehydration the girls shop, get some bargains and head home! EL befriends some lovely Hispanic ladies and after a hug and a kiss now has a permanent home in Florida!! As will become a pattern we headed to the pool but we’re chased away by a 2PM thunderstorm. Tonight was stay home night while LS and HM prepared a grilling feast of burgers hotdogs and salads. After many failed attempts to light the grill LS & AB
persevered and seriously one of our best meals was served! Well time to shop! ( yup eat and shop our theme) we were NOT passing up our 25% off coupons at Bealls. A few of us found stuff but in the words of HS some found “ shit” ! Big storm hit that night leaking into condo via kitchen window! Lots of towels later a flood was avoided. A new game to some of us Skit Skat was played. Our big winner was HM! She’s $7 richer soooo next dinner on her???
Another cloudy day as all girls gather at table for chit chat time. MS comes up with smartest idea to have a “kitty” with everyone chipping in $20 for essentials. Sun seems to be making an appearance so it’s to the beach. Poor Helen is having sleep issues during the night but NOT at the pool! As a matter of fact she sleeps so soundly that when a car hits the fencing right in back of her she never blinks an eye! In spite of clouds our girls are getting sun. No surprise who is getting too much (EL), and yes she’s using sunscreen. ND
is the most conscientious with visor, sun shirt and applying sunscreen! Pretty sure HM and AB not using sunscreen at all (???) tonight’s dinner at Salt Rocks ( early bird of course) view of the water and I guess Some very good looking guys that really distracted Helen but not quite enough because she tasted sand in her scallops!!! Tonight’s adventure was Johns Pass! LS had best ice cream at Kilwins (Chocolate coconut) which she graciously shared with MS and ND. EL, HM and AB had worst custard soft serve!!! As HM said it was actually warm!!!( and awful) The Equinox car made fatal mistake of taking HS home but not before a stop at CVS ( please reference HM sleep issues) HS VERY UNHAPPY with this change of course and ohhhhh boy we heard about it! Finally home and onto a new game. Probably more for the millennial crowd but HM was voted most likely to cuddle and she is now Cuddles!
Monday June 10:
Wow is it windy!!! Lots of kids at condo this time of year! Lots of adults too but they’re not watching the kids that’s for sure! Getting our morning sun/swim in before
our afternoon trip to Tarpon Springs. Kids in pool all have mini boogie boards that are blowing all over the pool and deck! The girls are dodging the flying objects fairly well but AB gets hit with a flying football no injuries sustained! Time for Tarpon! Annual trip to Hellas results in the continued controversy of potato salad / no potato salad in the Greek salad. Our resident true Greek says NOOOOO!!!! with our stomachs full we’re off to the shops! Sponges and shells galore but not much purchased. We could not convince HM to get the belly dancing swimsuit even though it was awesome!!!
Ohhh a surprise awaited HS at Hellas as she met an old friend from her days at Kohl’s!! Who’d a thunk it??? This friend always called HS “Hertie” or is it “Herdie” but the name stuck and she’s now ( phonetically) hairdee
Return to condo snacks and games await!
Tuesday????? Sorry no memories!????
The girls continue their sun/ no sun swimming, beach holiday! For those in the know the worst sun burns come from cloudy skies and AB is feeling the burn! Literally, she’s burnt! But today is her last day
so soak up the sun/ fun she does!! After a lesson on how to use Uber app AB is on her way! Remaining guests decide on evening plans. After dinner at Dockside Daves, fried food heaven, it’s another jaunt to Johns Pass. Ohhhh did we say AB had left for home??? FALSE!!! Bad weather in Chicago gave her the opportunity to RETURN TO CONDO!!! We rendezvous at Johns Pass!!! Many of us found a cute shop where for the low low price of ohhh say $40-$50 or more we got a free reusable bag!!!! Suckers!!!! Time for another ice cream stop and into our cars for the ride home!
EL,HM and AB arrive first hmmmm did the other gals stop for more ice cream? Snacks??? Wellllll not quite, ND was pulled over by the cops! Nooooo she did not make the illegal left turn out of condo.,. apparently the headlights were not on! Luckily after much ado she was let off with a warning. Much spirited discussion on auto vs not using auto on the lights ensued. In the end we played games till bed time!
AB ( now known as Natalie) Herty thinks she’s more a Natalie vs.
Annette... is enjoying her second last day. Cloudy as usual which is good because Nat has some very burned tops of her feet!!!! A crisis has occurred HERTA LOST HER GOOD BEACH EARRING!!! Darn if only we would have bought a metal detector at the flea market!!! By the way for future trips KEEP AN EYE OPEN FOR THE EARRING!!! Beach and pool again! LS had an encounter with a CRAB!!! Yup bit her right on the hand while swimming in the gulf! OUCH!!!! She’s got the scar to prove it! That pesky crab comes back on Friday and gets her foot too!!!! LS may not be man bait but the crabs LOVE HER!!!!
Good news for HM not only has she finally slept through the night she also is able to “ do her business “. Luckily she uses her own bathroom as EL’s is clogged!!! ( pretty sure not by EL) after trying to use the first plunger ever made , Gina saves the day with a workable one! No torn rotator cuff stops EL from plunging her toilet clear!!! Dinner Thursday was Conch( I think) more gripping I mean grouper for some and we are all swearing
off fried fish for a very very long time!!! We taught the gang to play double hearts and since Gina joined us we could play! Many losers in that game! Maybe LS won( can’t remember)! Time for bed to savor our last day on Friday.
Many gals up early and lo and behold the waves and beach are calm! We say goodbye to Nat once more and EL ventures into the gulf!!! Her loyal friends help steady her and yup it’s perfect!!!! HM gets seasick on raft and heads upstairs for a nap. The rest of us stay outside until after 4 or should I say After the early bird specials!!! Finally head to our final dinner Seabreeze the girls have a pretty long wait but are able to wait at the bar! Sassy pants buys us all pina coladas as we ponder the menu. Our name is called and we head to outside seating. It really was nice not too hot and no bugs! We were “ entertained “ by a woman playing literally the SLOWEST covers of songs. You’ve never fallen asleep to Bad Bad Leroy Brown but we almost did. Time to head back
to the dreaded job of packing and checking in at Spirit air or of course they charge you! EL had some “ spirited” words with a Spirit rep as they claim she did not pay for seats or luggage ( case still pending) seriously I’m still arguing with them even after showing my receipt! They are “ getting back”.
Boo hoo time to go! EL and HM leave early! Gas and car return is smooth, luggage weight not so much! That Spirit Air knows how to get every extra penny from customers!!
All girls arrive at gate, quick breakfast and loaded onto tin bucket to get us home. Apparently HM still sleepy as she falls asleep on lady to her right, EL is on her left. Guess lady not too thrilled to have Cuddles on her shoulder as she gives HM a nice poke to wake her up! HM manages to doze sitting up for rest of trip!
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