Fernie - weeks 8 to 11

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Hey y'all!

I know I know - but things have been a little hectic around here these last few weeks. The season went from casually ripping up the slopes and drinking beer to full on revising and practicing. It's been like Snowboard University. I'll even go so far as to say that a little of the same kinda stress from my Uni days was present before exam day, but more of that in a bit.

So, week 8 and we all went off to another resort called Red Mountain near the US border. This was a full on r&r weekend staying in luxury condos on the hill, riding the fresh dump of powder, and drinking cocktails in the hot tub. And man did we make the most of it! I spent so long in that outdoor hot tub that I was an albino raisin by Sunday. And I loved every shriveled minute of it!

We also managed to squeeze in a quick trip to the Kokanee brewery which brews the most popular beverage in British Columbia. It only seemed right to see who was responsible for the many appalling hangovers I've had in Canada (I went armed with photographic evidence of it's effects with the intention of suing, but came away with another six pack of the stuff. Dammit). Anyway, the whole weekend was going swimmingly until the coach journey home.

We'd braved an isolated mountain pass on the way there, getting caught in a snow storm with our wheels spinning uselessly. So it was decided that the return journey would be a slightly longer but safer route home. And all was going well until the driver started going a bit too fast around some of the corners. As we shouted for him to slow down we banked around a bend so hard that bags and jackets fell from the overhead lockers and people were thrown into the seats opposite. Then the driver yelled that the brakes had failed.

We spent a few more miles of going around corners with the wheels leaving the ground before racing into a small town with the horn blaring. The driver avoided most of the traffic before ramming a jeep off the road which slowed us down, and eventually we came to a stop by scraping the wheels along the kerb and hitting a lamp post. Cops, ambulance, fire crew, reporters, the lot. Despite a few jangled nerves the passengers of coach 104 Red Mountain were scratch free, and we later found out that the passengers in the jeep were all OK too.

After police had taken statements we were put up in a local hotel, and when we finally got back to Fernie the next day we all decided to take a day off to phone parents and chill out in town. Funny how these things can suddenly change the dynamics of a group. The thought of what could've happened if we'd've come home along that same snowy mountain pass brought everyone on the course that little bit closer.

Anyway, back to the exams.

Within a couple of days of our "Speed" experience, it was time for the Carving Instructor Course. I've probably already described this once, but just in case - "carving" is using the radius of the board's natural edge to turn. There is no sliding involved so you end up going pretty fast, but it's such a rush on freshly groomed slopes. The exam took two days, with riding assessment on the first day, and teaching on the second. And get me - I passed! Anyone wants to know how to carve, let me know!

Week 9 and next up was the Park Instructor Course. This was as far from carving as you could get - hitting the boxes and rails in the park, spinning off the natural jumps off piste, and then learning how to teach these skills to intermediate snowboarders. The rails and the park etiquette was no problem, as was the teaching part. But when it came to spinning a "backside 180" off a jump, it just wasn't happening. Arse! Frontside 180's and even frontside 360's not a problem. I just could not land my backside jumps cleanly - I get "the fear" when I can't see my landing! And so, despite bruised ribs and being constantly covered head to toe in snow, I didn't get the pass. All this jumping is a young man's game I reckon. I'll stick to the carving.

Later that week we arrived at Fernie mountain to see the aftermath of one of the biggest avalanches I'd ever seem. This thing had broken off half way down the "Face Lift" at the top of the resort, and slid down past the top of a chairlift, across a cat track and down into one of the runs. It was huge, leaving behind massive chunks of snow and ice. Despite the patrol's best efforts to keep the hill safe, these things happen a lot here and it's all very sobering. All I could think about was that we'd been riding the very run now covered in avalanche debris only the day before.

The weekend and guess what? More dressing up! Lovely. I really love dressing up.

"Hot Dog Day" is based on an 80's ski film of the same name, and for a couple of surreal days the hill goes back in time. People sip beer in bright flourescent jackets and tight fitting ski pants. Thirty year old Burton snowboards are dusted off and admired. Bon Jovi and Guns n' Roses blare out from every outdoor speaker system. It's all actually very funny - people even ride as they did in the day - bring on that counter rotation! The weekend climaxed with an big kicker being built next to an ice bar half way up the mountain. Probably not the best idea in the world, but I'm happy to report that despite hitting the jump a couple of times the only headache I got that day was from all the flouro jackets. Oh, and from that bloody Kokanee...

Week 10 and I decide to do the Level 2 Instructor Course early. I wanted to get "The Big One" out of the way so I could enjoy my last few days in Fernie relaxing. I knew that there was a big leap between Levels 1 and 2, but I had no idea just how intense and demanding it would be. Just two of us did it early from the Nonstop Course, the rest of the group was made up of people who had trained in other resorts, or were doing re-takes.

Level 2 (of 4) is a four day exam; the first day concentrating on riding skills, the second and third days doing intense carving and advanced sliding turns, and the fourth day with teaching evaluation. The lesson format for Level 2 is based on a "hole part hole" scenario. Start by riding with an intermediate to advanced group, watch them for a bit and see which part of their riding they need to improve on (spotting the "hole"). You then use various tactics that isolate the area they need to improve on, for instance their balance, or their steering (the "part"). Then you finish off by getting them to put those tactics back into their riding (filling the "hole"). The trick here is learning the spot the problem. Easy with beginner riders, but when you're watching advanced snowboarders on black runs the problems are a little harder to spot.

After a nail biting wait in the bar upstairs we were finally called down for our results. And much to my amazement I got "above standard" for the teaching, and after a little more work on my advanced sliding turns (goddamn picky assessors...), I was handed my CASI Level 2 Instructor badge! Oh yeah baby! LEVEL 2 NO LESS! This my friends is a really big deal and the chances of me getting a job in December have just doubled. At the risk of being ridiculed by my Canadian friends, I am very, very "chuffed".

And so, free of the pressure that comes with lessons and exams, I went riding with Steve, the Freestyle Instructor yesterday. It was nice not to think about my riding too much, and just hit jumps and learn silly little tricks on the mellow slopes. And I loved every bloody minute of it.

"Hey Paul - what the fuck is up with you?" says Steve standing in line for the bar at the end of the day. He says 'fuck' a lot.
"Wish I'd stomped my backside 180's like that last week" I sigh.
"Suck it up princess," says Steve. "and get you're ass up here".
"You short for cash?" I ask.
"No you shit fuck, I'm buying you a shot. I delayed sending your assessment form off to CASI and I'm totally giving you your Park Cert."

And that was how I finally got my fourth and final Instructor Certificate. A surprising and pleasant end to a stressful and very exhausting week.

So, Week 11, and my season is rapidly coming to an end.
The rest of the Nonstop group are now half way through their Level 2 assessment while I ride around the mountain without a care in the world. I write this now sat in my living room, the view of the snowcapped mountains through my window. I will miss this place a lot. For the past three months I've considered it my home and in two days I will wave goodbye to my new friends as they fly home, and I head off to Lake Louise in Banff for a bit more riding. With all my new qualifications the chances of getting sponsored now are pretty good. I love Fernie and it would great to come back here in December for my first season as a Level 2 Instructor, and work with the people who helped me achieve it. We'll see.

Right, I'm off out for margueritas, fajitas, and a spot of skateboarding, and to catch up with the guys and gals doing level 2 today, see how they're getting on.

And tomorrow?
Mmm. Think I'll go snowboarding.

Lapster.

Level 2 Snowboarding Instructor
Level 1 Park Instructor
Level 1 Carving Instructor

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Photos

A touch of luxury.
View from our condo in Red Mountain. I could so get used to that.

Deadly Koknaee beer.
Somebody stop them making this stuff! It's killing me!

And, relax.
The coach finally comes to rest just before a bridge over a large river. When this was taken everyone was off looking for a bar.

Chairlift studying.
A last minute check on my tactics, and which terrain to use for my lesson. I find it better to leave it 'till the last minute.

Snake Ridge.
Hiking in search of deeper powder. If I'm to do bigger jumps I want softer landings thank you very much.

Hot Dog Day!
Nice! Glen and Ryan show off their outfits, and some. (Glen! What the..!)

Airtime, 80's style!
A retro skier shows how he did it back then. And no, my jump was not quite that big.

The Hair Bear Bunch!
Three months worth of hair is displayed with pride!