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Published: March 27th 2006
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Bicycle
Bicycles - just as dangerous as cars if you ask me. If you’re expecting tales of drugs, sex shows and drunken debauchery from our trip to Amsterdam, I’m afraid you will be greatly disappointed. The closest we got to experiencing the ‘naughty Netherlands’ was a severe overdose of Gouda, a brief run-in with a goat, pea soup and a Night-watchman.
We headed to the Dutch metropolis the last weekend in February to celebrate Jon’s birthday. Flying with KLM, we were very excited about not having to rush for our seats a la' RyanAir and EasyJet (like JetStar for those at home). I was very excited by the fact that the flight involved us literally taking off and then landing - altogether 45 minutes flying time.
We arrived in Amsterdam about 11pm, after a brief train ride from Schipol. With neither of us speaking Dutch (every time I tried I ended up speaking German, while Jon believes that English should be the mother tongue of all people), we decided to avert a tram ride until we had our morning eyes and took a cab to our hotel instead. We stayed at Hotel Piet Hein, which is right on the edge of the main park, and I have
Canal cruise
A beautiful way to see the city.. to say a rather good choice on my behalf (I have picked some doozies lately). Our room was cosy, clean and overlooked the park, however they didn’t seem to like the idea of a shower door and instead put a small levee bank on the bathroom floor which fills up like bath tub every time you shower. I guess it was fun paddling around.
We arose next morning and jumped on our first tram, fine for those of you living in Melbourne, but with these things driving on the opposite side of them road and names like ‘Mechelsesteenweg’ as destinations, it was a little challenging for us. First on the agenda was Anne Frank’s house. A queue ensued, but it was well worth the wait, and I found the experience of being in her hideaway room and seeing her REAL diary quite moving. To recover, we headed to the nearest brown café (an Amsterdam institution without the wacky ‘baccy) and indulged in coffee, pumpernickel and pea and ham soup. Very yummy and warming, as it was freezing outside.
Next was the Bloommarket. Shops upon shops and rows of tulips and flowers and other things
Clogs
Funny shoes - don't quite look as comfortable as gum boots though. you can grow in your garden. We discovered the Magic Mushroom Gallery here and popped in to see the pre-packaged funghi (for your convenience). I decided to buy some bulbs instead, tulip bulbs, that is. Our last stop for the day was the Heineken Brewery. After travelling inside the journey of a bottle of Heineken from wheat to gullet, we were rewarded with a few complimentary pints at the end of our visit. What a perfect way to prepare for the evening! We headed home to don our evening gear.
The Dutch are not renowned for their cuisine, but do great renditions of every one else’s. We headed around the corner to a little French bistro and decided to partake some of Amsterdam’s finest cheese. We were brought a plate piled high with the very best. I never realised how hard it was to eat cheese by itself, and after running out of saliva we called in the help of a fruity little bottle of red to assist us. After a scrummy dinner, our intention (well, mine) was to head to the infamous red-light district and see some naughty goings-on, namely a live sex show. We wandered
Mmmm...beer
Heineken - wheaty goodness. along the main strip and upon sight of my first close-up window girl I became Peter Piker once more. (Window-girls line the streets of this area. They sit all night in a small room with a glass door looking onto the street. Rather scantily clad and seemingly enjoying themselves in there, you are welcome to knock on a ladies’ door, where you are then dragged in and the curtain closed. I found out for around 15 minutes of fun you can expect to pay from €50. Bargain). Jon decided that seeing people rockin’ and rollin’ on stage was not something I was ready for (ever) and we decided to check out a sex shop instead. Such a large, diverse range of DVDs! Starring everyone (thing) from girls to boys to ‘its’ to meat to goats to Paris Hilton! We left and went next door to the Erotic Museum. Very educational (see pictures) and surprisingly housing original John Lennon drawings. We went back to the hotel only slightly disturbed.
Next day we headed for Museum alley. We went to the Rijksmuseum to check out Mr Vermeer and Mr Rembrandt’s work. Well worth a look if you are in
He's so sexy
What a pretty boy!! town. We then strolled to one of Amsterdam’s many canals and hopped aboard a tour boat to see the city from the water. Absolutely beautiful! Our time to leave this laid-back town was drawing nearer and so we quickly popped into the Bulldog café to see what all the fuss was about. A thick, dense cloud of smoke hung around the ceiling. A funny, sleepy feeling came over me. Reason told me that trying to catch an international flight would grow more difficult the longer I stayed in this cafe, so we left. The snow outside woke me up instantly.
Amsterdam is such a beautiful, casual city - and not just because of all the stoned hippies running the place. We had such a relaxing time and still managed to see so much. I would love to go back when it is warmer to enjoy more of its offerings. Cultural offerings, that is.
Looking for fun and feelin’ groovy….
Love Jude.
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