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Published: October 12th 2008
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Sunrise at Sorrento
Photo doesnt do it justice... I was up at 06:30 after a relatively sleepless night, thanks to a deluge of American exchange students. The ferry to Amalfi left Sorrento at 07:30. With a 40min walk ahead I was cutting it pretty fine. On the way, I realised I needed cash for a ticket. Unfortunately, cashpoints which accept my card are suprisingly hard to come by. Every one I tried returned it - usually after several minutes of whirring and beeping. Stress levels were slowly rising as was my body temprature. 15mins until ferry departure and still had to get cash and descend to the port. I ended up bounding down the stairs like a mountain goat, only to find the ferry was running late - fecking Italians.
What a beautiful morning to be on the boat though. Just as we were leaving, the sun broke from behind the cliffs at Sorrento, casting a single ray miles out to sea. That alone was worth the early rise. I had the boat to myself until we hit Positano, where I mistakenly tried to disembark - well, it looked exactly like the photos I'd seen of Amalfi....Luckily, one of the guys on the gangway shouted "Attenzione - questo
Ferry to Amalfi
About 730am - nice light Positano!" Or I may have spent several confused hours trying to work out where I was. Amalfi is only a short distance further down the coast, outwardly it's not quite as impressive as Positano, being somewhat smaller. This is all relative though "can't believe i'm on the Amalfi coast" kept running thorugh my head, and not for the last time that day...
Theres a tourist info office directly opposite the port, staffed by the Viz's very own "Lazy disenterested shop girl" why do sour-faced-fat-rides readily find employment in jobs which require people skills? Makes you wonder. I asked her several times which bus I should take if I wanted to do the path, receiving a curt reply in unintelligble Italian each time . I walked out before I lost my temper and went for a wander round Amalfi. One piece of information I did get from her was the time of the bus - 1015. Leaving me two hours to explore. Amalfi is really tiny, pretty, but not much to see. I wandered a bit out of town and watched the road cyclists descending the hill before confronting the psycho hose beast again to buy my ticket. The duration
of the winding bus journey saw me on my back on the back seat, staring at the ceiling. I'm sure the scenery was marvellous but a cursory glance was enough to make me ill. I still didn't know which stop I was getting off at. From the appearance and regular consultation of massive OS type maps I surmised a bunch of German guys had similar plans to me, when they got off I quickly followed. My map was in leaflet form, issued by the tourist office. I felt slightly inadequete....
The start of the path is relatively easy to find with a large sign in English/Italian detailing it. Leaving the Germans to set off I took a seat in a little bar and ordered a large Peroni, quickly followed by another. 20mins later I set off, a spring (perhaps a stagger?) in my step. With grim determination I adorned myself in a skin tight Helly Hansen and set off to teach the foolish Germans a lesson. The path is almost immediately beautiful, even at the lowest point it's still very high above the glittering azure sea below. A sense of calm is everywhere, the only noise coming from local
farmers and occasional livestock. It all adds to the atmosphere and feeling that one (yes,
one) is in Italy. 30mins in I had the enemy on the horizon. I redoubled my pace catching them at luncheon on a crossroads. Smirking knowingly to myself I puffed my chest and set on up the hill, pretending I wasn't expending the least amount of effort. A talent gained from years of road cycling. I imagined my conquered foes mid mastication:
"Did you see that guy? Wow, he was pure pishing aw oower the path man"
"Aye, did ye see tht top man? Skintight tae fook - bawbag must bee a pro.." I paused briefly, dragging my skintight ass up the side of a scree cliff for a photo opportunity. The path was about 80 feet below me and I soon had a crowd of walkers pointing at my stupidity as I fannied about trying to do a self-timer shot. After getting this photo I skillfully descended the cliff, on my arse, at high speed, just as the Germans were passing. I'm sure I caught a slight smirk on one of their faces so I hung around for a second, letting
Amalfi coast
not sure which town though them pass by so I could blitz them once more. This time giving a running commentary - Murray Walker style, just in case they didn't appreciate their complete inadequecy. Now, this may seem to be "Not in the spirit of a gentle stroll on the Amalfi coast" but you would be wrong....
Allow me to quote the great D.H. Lawrence:
"There kin be nae greter joi than walkin' pure high up on the Amalllfi caist, donning a skeenteet top, and pishin aw oooer whitever dobbers ye meet on yir trevels. Eshpeshially if thir Germans - the b******s"
The next two hours flew by, weather was perfect. Felt very warm, especially once I hit the end of the trail. It descends via 1500 steps through several small villages before finally ending on the road to Positano. I walked into the town and treated myself to a surprisingly cheap beer before a quick change in the toilets - everyone in Positano was impeccably dressed and I felt like a bit of a skintight pleb. Positano is much more upmarket than Amalfi with many designer shops. I walked around for a couple of hours, drawing some strange looks with my beanie hat and wayfarers on. At 4.pm I was starting to get a tad hungry and decided to head back to Sorrento for a dinner that didn't cost a days budget. I bought my ferry ticket
Reflections
on the water and stretched out on the beach for 45mins before enjoying the extended (it was a slow boat) but relaxing trip back to Sorrento.
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mam
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Positano.....gasp..sigh..Sooo beautiful. Pleased you enjoyed it. As for the blog... "I imagined my conquered foes mid mastication" and "pishin aw ower the path man" ! Am re applyin mascara as we speak. Sooo funny. You are so talented as a writer. Wish I wis laffin aw the way to the bank!!!! Keep up the good work! xx