TAKEN FROM MY JOURNAL: So its 04.30 the feelings are so intense and confusing - I don’t think I’ve ever felt these emotions before and it's hard to put them into words. I'm shattered but there's no way I’m sleeping tonight, far too many things going around my head; going over things I haven't done, whether I’m doing the right thing, how much is going to change in my absence...... Physically I feel so sick my stomach is turning over and over and over.... I'm having really bad hot flushes, hands pouring with sweat and my breathing....well it's just really hard to regulate it and breathe normally, I’m having to think about every breath I take...... So feeling an emotional wreak the time came to say goodbye to Andi and get going, that just set me
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